God man, if you're still messed up, or close to that, I wouldn't do it. If you're still messed up I wouldn't date, period. But the age difference?
I don't know a lot about the US but, uhm, presidents: Clinton and his lover, JFK and his eighteen year old lover. Then Elvis with his 22 year old bride, Demi Moore who married at 18 with someone fifteen years older, Anna Nicole Smith who married out of love? Even the list of stars dating stars twenty years younger is endless.
9 years difference at 21-30? Man, study Bruce Willis' love life for a second and you'll laugh about it.