Women are crazy. Interpret this text exchange for me, please

Jack21222

Yes, I absolutely would, and often have. I don't think it's poor etiquette to ask what I'll be eating before deciding whether to go. Surely it would be MUCH WORSE etiquette to accept the invitation, and then refuse to eat because I don't like what they made.

About an hour passed between when she told me what she was making (which I do generally like) and when the quoted conversation in the OP took place. The logistics were the only thing that played into my decision once I had time to think about it.

Anyway, I just texted her to make sure we'll still going. I'm leaving in 10 minutes if so, and I'm still not dressed yet.

rhody

Pengy,

I agree with you, Borek, and Evo's comments, text messages don't lie, the evidence is there for all to see and review. Insecure and controlling are appropriate word's I would use as well.

On a positive note, sometimes instead of being the vehicle to highlight a problem, text's can actually be used to work through problem's in a relationship, because, first, they take longer to communicate than speech, you can carefully consider and pick your words carefully to deliver your message with great clarity, no room for interpretation, if there are nuances during the session, you can correct or clarify to the other party. It worked for me recently and my wife agreed it was better than talking in elevated tones filibustering one another, plenty gets lost in that exchange, let me tell you. But not with the slower pace of text's.

Peng, I hope you didn't take my comment in the chat quiz seriously, it was all good fun, I love you wicked sense of humor, and imitation is a form of flattery, eh ?

Rhody...

PBechthold

Ya. Your feelings are valid. But it isn't really a "playing a role". It is more of an understanding of what your partner is like and how to make them happy. Also, I don't know a married man to date that doesn't believe in "Happy wife, happy life"

But I do get your comment.

rootX

I thought he over-interpreted what she said and making big deal out of comments like "Thanks alot I won't offer anything ever again" and escalating it to a serious fight But your post makes much more sense!

cmb

As far as I can tell, this is fairly normal behaviour for neuro-typical humans, male or female. No good turn deserves to go unpunished.

I have made only one conclusion in my 20 years of relationships; to have no wife/girlfriend is to have too few of them, to have one is too many.

nucleargirl

lollollol... this is totally something I could see myself doing...

Basically, she wants to see how much you want to spend time with her and enjoy her company! So if she was a super hot girl and you just met her last week, if she offered to cook you breakfast and you guys could eat together before going to the fair, you'd totally say yes right?! cos you are super attracted!

But now you know her for a while, you see her all the time, you stop feeling like she's so special and you cant be bothered to get up one hour early to see her. you'd rather sleep.
Well, this doesnt make her feel very good! she wants to feel like you are just as attracted to her and likes her just as much as before!

I guess its a little unrealistic of her to expect that... but if you love her, you could make a bit more effort! come on, its one hour of sleep. go to bed one hour earlier and go to her house with a flower in your hand and she will be super happy! and so will you.

Pengwuino

$10 says you are the girl in question

Jack21222

Wrong

A little more effort? I just spent almost 14 hours with her. Surely that's enough.

I really don't think I would be "super happy" about getting there early with a flower in my hand, anyway. That just doesn't sound like something I'd do.

DaveC426913

You people are brutal. And you judge like none of you have ever had a misunderstanding via electronic messaging.

"I'll pass. Thanks anyway" is quite terse and can be construed to be quite a cold rejection.

Granted, she may have overreacted. But it could have been easily rectified by acknowledging that she wanted to do something nice, but it would be awkward for your schedule, and there's no sleight intended. Instead you act like her feeling sleighted - even for the moment - is "crazy". There is no empathy here for her feelings. It was just an ember, but you threw gasoline on it.

This is a classic case of mutual escalation. One steps out of line, even momentarily, and the other, rather than cajoling the two of them back to centre with a calming word, pushes it further from centre. Spiral downward guaranteed.


You guys might be both better off apart.

Evo

My *crazy sensor* has never been wrong.

Pyrrhus

Hmmm, I would have probably ignored her response about you rejecting the offer, and just tell her you'll see her at the pick up time, and move along.

I like Serena

Uhh...

Could you elaborate?

Phrak

Crazy. Under reacting. Over reacting.

These don't say much.

The woman wants some romance out of you and you are not responding correctly. Romance means worship. She does some small thing, like making bacon and eggs, and you are supposed to go gnumb with appreciation and faun all over her and treat her to extravigant gifts, treats and delights.

You are not living up to the romance novels. Get with it shipmate.

--or just use, abuse and dump her; she's crazy.

MarcoD

Yah, that's what I think too. Girl wants some romance, and he probably always wants to drive. Nothing happening, totally normal relation.

Man, two 'crazinesses' in three months. Last relation I had saw tree mood swings a day including the aggressiveness and throwing with stuff. Couldn't get it to work, that's the only thought I have on the whole subject.

DaveC426913

Wow.

You single?

256bits

This may tide Jack through life ( and the rest of us dumb males ) who find the woman's mind a mystery.
http://funny2.com/whatwomenwantinaman.htm

What women want in a man at age 25:

1. Handsome
2. Charming
3. Financially successful
4. A caring listener
5. Witty
6. In good shape
7. Dresses with style
8. Appreciates finer things
9. Full of thoughtful surprises
10. An imaginative, romantic lover


What women want in a man at age 35:

1. Nice looking (preferably with hair)
2. Opens car doors, holds chairs
3. Has enough money for a nice dinner
4. Listens more than talks
5. Laughs at my jokes
6. Carries bags of groceries with ease
7. Owns at least one tie
8. Appreciates a good home-cooked meal
9. Remembers birthdays and anniversaries
10. Seeks romance at least once a week

What women want in a man at age 45:

1. Not too ugly (bald head is fine)
2. Doesn't drive off until I'm in the car
3. Works steady - splurges on dinner out occasionally
4. Nods head when I'm talking
5. Usually remembers punch lines of jokes
6. Is in good enough shape to rearrange the furniture
7. Wears a shirt that covers his stomach
8. Knows not to buy champagne with screw-top lids
9. Remembers to put the toilet seat down
10. Shaves most weekends

What women want in a man at age 55:

1. Keeps hair in nose and ears trimmed
2. Doesn't belch or scratch in public
3. Doesn't borrow money too often
4. Doesn't nod off to sleep when I'm venting
5. Doesn't re-tell the same joke too many times
6. Is in good enough shape to get off couch on weekends
7. Usually wears matching socks and fresh underwear
8. Appreciates a good TV dinner
9. Remembers your name on occasion
10. Shaves some weekends

What women want in a man at age 65:

1. Doesn't scare small children
2. Remembers where bathroom is
3. Doesn't require much money for upkeep
4. Only snores lightly when asleep
5. Remembers why he's laughing
6. Is in good enough shape to stand up by himself
7. Usually wears some clothes
8. Likes soft foods
9. Remembers where he left his teeth
10. Remembers that it's the weekend

What women want in a man at age 75:

1. Breathing
2. Doesn't miss the toilet

Phrak

No, I'm married. And the default state of toilet seat covers is up, of course.

You?