Collection of Lame Jokes

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In summary: It's a humor that relies on absurdity and unexpectedness. It's not for everyone.Not a fan of surrealism, I take it?In summary, surrealism is an art form that relies on absurdity and unexpectedness, often producing incongruous imagery or effects. It may not be appreciated by everyone, but for those who do, it can be quite humorous.
  • #3,431
mfb said:
If you make one out of actual pie, it is a large collection of electrons, protons and neutrons.

The world is made out of ##4## fundamental particles: protons, neutrons, electrons and morons.
 
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Physics news on Phys.org
  • #3,432
Does the world operate as moron collider??
 
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  • #3,433
AlexCaledin said:
Does the world operate as moron collider??

That might explain a lot of conflicts!
 
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  • #3,434
AlexCaledin said:
Does the world operate as moron collider??
Many, but using that name for them is not politically correct.
 
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  • #3,435
Bogs Bunny would use the word "maroon" instead.
 
  • #3,436
fresh_42 said:
Nope. As far as I remember, this was Incontinentia
Incontinentia Buttocks.
 
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  • #3,437
DaveC426913 said:
Incontinentia Buttocks.
She has a husband, you know...
 
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  • #3,438
IMG_1488577361.705824.jpg

But, can it pass the IKEA test?
 
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  • #3,439
fresh_42 said:
I knew it. The moon landing was a hoax!
The footage was faked on Mars.



 
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  • #3,440
mfb said:
The footage was faked on Mars.

you didn't see that one at the top of the page ? :wink::wink:
 
  • #3,441
16904647_10212209430490907_1669985016665345362_o.jpg
 
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  • #3,442
davenn said:
you didn't see that one at the top of the page ? :wink::wink:
That?
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  • #3,443
mfb said:
That?

yes that :smile:

davenn said:
this is too funny ! ...



maybe something weird with your browser ??
 
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  • #3,444
davenn said:
you didn't see that one at the top of the page ? :wink::wink:
I think he meant the moon footage was shot on Mars.
 
  • #3,445
DaveC426913 said:
I think he meant the moon footage was shot on Mars.

going by his quote it appeared that he didn't see my video

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  • #3,446
mfb said:
Better learn what dementia is before you get it.
What's the use? He won't remember after anyway ...
 
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  • #3,447
Things that you learned earlier tend to be available longer.
 
  • #3,448
If Mickey and Minnie ever pass away (perish the thought!), where will they be interred?

In a mousoleum.
 
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  • #3,449
jtbell said:
If Mickey and Minnie ever pass away (perish the thought!), where will they be interred?

In a mousoleum.
... and Donald will never see the money bin :biggrin:
 
  • #3,450
So True !

upload_2017-3-6_3-12-52.png
 
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  • #3,451
EnumaElish said:
It sounds like the name of a Latin woman who would blow one's mind off.
And she has a grandmother ... Senility ...
 
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  • #3,452
President Trump was taken on a tour of the Keystone Pipeline area in a small private plane by a friend of his. On his return he commented on how friendly all the waving Native Americans had seemed. “They love me”, he said.
trump visits pipeline area.jpg
 
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  • #3,453
peeling potatoes.jpg
 
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  • #3,454
davenn said:
... No matter what men do ...
A young Californian skateboarder found a bottle at the beach, picked it up and all of a sudden a Jinn appeared to offer him three wishes.
"Wow", answered the young man, "I want to be rich, beautiful, and ... let's see ... uhh, yes, I want a half-pipe from here to Honolulu."
"O.k.", said the Jinn, "money and beauty aren't a problem, but how on Earth should I build the pipe? Do you have any idea, how much planning, what terrible amount of concrete, unbelievable long piers deep in the ocean and many other things I would need? Not to mention the earthquakes. Come on, pick another wish!" The young man thought about it for a while and replied: "In this case, I want to understand the girls." - "Let's get back to the pipe. Which surface do you want? Is Italian Marble o.k. to you? Do you need some recreation areas along the way ..."
 
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  • #3,455
fresh_42 said:
A young Californian skateboarder found a bottle at the beach, picked it up and all of a sudden a Jinn appeared to offer him three wishes.
"Wow", answered the young man, "I want to be rich, beautiful, and ... let's see ... uhh, yes, I want a half-pipe from here to Honolulu."
"O.k.", said the Jinn, "money and beauty aren't a problem, but how on Earth should I build the pipe? Do you have any idea, how much planning, what terrible amount of concrete, unbelievable long piers deep in the ocean and many other things I would need? Not to mention the earthquakes. Come on, pick another wish!" The young man thought about it for a while and replied: "In this case, I want to understand the girls." - "Let's get back to the pipe. Which surface do you want? Is Italian Marble o.k. to you? Do you need some recreation areas along the way ..."

hahahaha
 
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  • #3,456
Artman said:
Where do you find a turtle with no legs?

Right where you left it.
LOL
 
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  • #3,457
16996239_1825877674348485_4692493552289202215_n.jpg
 
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  • #3,458
davenn said:
16996239_1825877674348485_4692493552289202215_n.jpg
:oldsurprised: What is this sorcery ?

When I put up one finger and five fingers I get six fingers, where did all of these hands come from?

We should get Costello to teach them some maths
 
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  • #3,459
davenn said:
dedicated to all our northern hemisphere members
have a wonderful and snowy Christmas :smile:

View attachment 110659
Warning (to all our southern hemisphere members, from the north ones):
The sun is now moving this way ... so soon watch your ass! ...
 
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  • #3,460
Stavros Kiri said:
Warning (to all our southern hemisphere members, from the north ones):
The sun is now moving this way ... so soon watch your ass! ...

I don't see snow where I am from in Australia :frown:
 
  • #3,461
davenn said:
I don't see snow where I am from in Australia :frown:
Well, never say never ... , but the good news is you still have time to prepare ... just in case!
 
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  • #3,462
davenn said:
I don't see snow where I am from in Australia :frown:
Could at least see Tasmania from where you live? Like some could see Russia from where they live. :wink:
 
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  • #3,463
fresh_42 said:
Could at least see Tasmania from where you live? Like some could see Russia from where they live. :wink:
... with live web camera ...
 
  • #3,464
fresh_42 said:
Could at least see Tasmania from where you live? Like some could see Russia from where they live. :wink:

is that like the two blondes in Kansas, one blonde talking to another saying " the moon is closer than Florida, because I can see the moon but not Florida " ? :wink:

On occasions we do get snow up in the mountains to the west of Sydney. Took my Filipino wife up there 8 years back for her first play in snow ( it was very light, hardly covered the ground LOL ... but she loved it)

The best snow she has yet been in is in the USA ... once at Mt St Helens and then a week later in Yellowstone NPDave
 
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  • #3,465
davenn said:
is that like the two blondes in Kansas, one blonde talking to another saying " the moon is closer than Florida, because I can see the moon but not Florida " ? :wink:
O.k., Sarah isn't blonde but despite of this ...

If it comforts you: I have an equivalent (personal) pity to your absence of snow also due to the fact that I'm living almost on the exact opposite place on this rock than you. I mean, they released raccoons, greater rheas and Alexandrian parrots (accidentally) into the wild. Hell, even some red-necked wallabies made it into the wild and survived at least a couple of years (>4, but haven't heard of them for a while now). And the only animal that wouldn't have any climatic problems at all over here, one of my absolutely well beloved dudes - they of all beasts didn't escape anywhere: Keas. :cool:
 
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