What do 'nerdy' guys like in girls?

  • Thread starter MissSilvy
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In summary, the conversation is about what qualities nerdy boys like in girls. The group discusses the challenges of dating nerdy guys who are often shy and give mixed signals. Some suggest that nerdy guys may appreciate a direct approach, while others mention qualities such as intelligence, ambition, and being an atheist as attractive to nerdy guys. The conversation also touches on the importance of physical appearance and having a good sense of humor. Overall, the group agrees that nerdy guys have high standards and are looking for someone who is intelligent, accomplished, and kind.
  • #1
MissSilvy
300
1
Let's turn the tables for a second: what qualities do 'nerdy' boys like in girls?

I love 'nerdy' boys and I'm very lucky that my school is quite science and tech focused. However, a lot of them are incredibly cute and endearing but very shy and give off mixed signals. With other guys, it's fairly straight forward but I know quite a few self-professed 'dorks' that I would go out to dinner with if only they'd ask.

There have been numerous threads on what girls like in guys, but now I'm asking the opposite question; what do smart guys like yourselves like in girls? If possible, I'd be interested in opinions on or from college-aged guys. Thanks!

('Sex' is not an answer. Nice try, PF but I'm looking for more subtle points :))
 
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  • #2
I always had to ask the nerdy guys out myself. I would just go up to them and ask "where are you taking me Friday night?" It always worked. You will find that nerdy guys will answer a direct question.
 
  • #3
I figured I'd have to do that, good idea :) I was just curious about which qualities the guys find attractive in girls.

Nice line by the way!
 
  • #4
MissSilvy said:
I figured I'd have to do that, good idea :) I was just curious about which qualities the guys find attractive in girls.

Nice line by the way!
I'm interested too, glad you started this thread!
 
  • #5
Evo said:
I would just go up to them and ask "where are you taking me Friday night?"

If this ever happens to me with a girl, I think I'll mary her. 3 X Horray for a women's initiative! :smile:

Well, joke aside, in general, it seems to me that the more intelligent a person is (no matter of which gender), the more the person seeks in another person. More specific, the importance of physical appearance will decrease (although it's disputable by itself - beauty is an absolutely subjective category, and I hate persons who avoid to admit that!), but I don't believe much.

If by "nerdy" you mean intelligent, that opens another debate, since there is something called emotial intelligence, and it definitely doesn't need to appear in pairs with (let's say) non-emotional intelligence (let's say you're a physics genious or so).
 
  • #6
Since I'm not a nerd, I really don't have any first hand advice for you. However, I asked my wife, just in case she had any experience with nerds. It turns out that she's had plenty over the past 20 years with one nerd in particular whose name she did not reveal to me. It turns out that nerds are looking for women that are clever, beautiful, accomplished, and generous. In short, they're looking for my wife. She's lucky she got me and not one of them. If you persist in looking for one of them, then as Evo suggests, give them no room for maneuver. Given a choice, they wilt.
 
  • #7
Evo said:
I always had to ask the nerdy guys out myself. I would just go up to them and ask "where are you taking me Friday night?" It always worked. You will find that nerdy guys will answer a direct question.

Let me guess, they took you to see their new cool hacks in c64?
 
  • #8
MissSilvy said:
what do smart guys like yourselves like in girls? If possible, I'd be interested in opinions on or from college-aged guys. Thanks!

I'm waaaay past being college age, but back in my day, it was kidneys.
 
  • #9
jimmysnyder said:
It turns out that nerds are looking for women that are clever, beautiful, accomplished, and generous. In short, they're looking for my wife. She's lucky she got me and not one of them.

:rofl:
 
  • #10
I won't ask a girl out unless I'm really interested in her, and that happens quite rarely. It's hard to say what exactly I'm looking for, but the last girl I was really interested in was brilliant, witty, gorgeous, fun to be with, and had a charming accent.

On the other hand, I would be willing to date pretty much any girl that's pleasant to be around, were they to ask me out. (although I wouldn't expect it to last more than a few dates)
 
  • #11
Hurkyl said:
I won't ask a girl out unless I'm really interested in her, and that happens quite rarely. It's hard to say what exactly I'm looking for, but the last girl I was really interested in was brilliant, witty, gorgeous, fun to be with, and had a charming accent.
So nerdy guys have low expectations. :biggrin:
 
  • #12
I am a nerdy guy who is 23 and in college. I have 3 qualities that I look for in a girl.

1. Intelligents
2. Ambition
3. Atheist

Intelligents is a big one for me. I'm not talking about 35 on the SATs smart, but actual intelligence like to be able to comprehend things that most people cant. I also like a girl who has ambition in life, for example pursuing a PhD or wanting to become a research scientist or doctor or something of the sort. And last, she has to be an atheist or at least agnostic. This one really disqualifies most girls but I can't deal with the religious propaganda anymore. I honestly have never met a girl that met all three of these qualities, which is why I haven't had a gf in the past couple years. If I met a girl that did, chances are that I would marry her.

As for other not as important qualities, I like girls that are kind of shy and have a good sense of humor. Also, a girl that doesn't drink and isn't afraid to tell people what she honestly thinks is a big plus too.

On the other hand, I would be willing to date pretty much any girl that's pleasant to be around, were they to ask me out.

I'll go out with any girl at least once if she asks. Although that last one that asked me out was pretty far out there. :uhh:
 
  • #13
My experience: Nerdy guys like girls who wear glasses. :!) Unfortunately they usually also wear glasses, which makes for clunky kissing (imagine the stereotype of braces linking together!). :rofl:
 
  • #14
Topher925 said:
And last, she has to be an atheist or at least agnostic. This one really disqualifies most girls but I can't deal with the religious propaganda anymore. I honestly have never met a girl that met all three of these qualities, which is why I haven't had a gf in the past couple years.

Well, not all "religious" girls are necessarily religious fanatics too, right?

I don't believe that this would really disqualify a girl. If so, you probably won't have a gf in the next couple of years, either. :tongue:
 
  • #15
Topher925 said:
I am a nerdy guy who is 23 and in college. I have 3 qualities that I look for in a girl.

1. Intelligents
2. Ambition
3. Atheist

How can an intelligent woman be a believer? What does the previous statement imply?
 
  • #16
misgfool said:
How can an intelligent woman be a believer?

In a way, I agree, but let's just not overdo things. :wink:
 
  • #17
MissSilvy said:
Let's turn the tables for a second: what qualities do 'nerdy' boys like in girls?

I love 'nerdy' boys and I'm very lucky that my school is quite science and tech focused. However, a lot of them are incredibly cute and endearing but very shy and give off mixed signals. With other guys, it's fairly straight forward but I know quite a few self-professed 'dorks' that I would go out to dinner with if only they'd ask.

"...if only they'd ask." I think that is the main problem that you will run into with any guy, but probably a little more so with nerdy guys. Nobody likes rejection, so until they learn that it's not the end of the world if a girl says no they will always be hesitant to approach someone they like. It is probably a little more of an issue with nerdy guys because it is likely that growing up they were not as accepted socially as some others.

Life is too short, so if there is someone you'd like to go out with I'd just ask them out (that goes for everyone). In the end I'd rather take the rejection than regret never asking. If they don't want to go out with you it is their loss.

As for what nerdy boys like in a girl I'd say intelligence, sense of humor, and someone that likes them for who they are.
 
  • #18
misgfool said:
How can an intelligent woman be a believer?

Or nice people atheists?
 
  • #19
How can an intelligent woman be a believer?

My opinion is mutual but I can't really afford getting any more infractions so I'm not going into it. :smile:
 
  • #20
Hurkyl said:
It's hard to say what exactly I'm looking for, but the last girl I was really interested in was brilliant, witty, gorgeous, fun to be with, and had a charming accent.

How do you know I've got a charming accent? :wink:

oh, I'm bad :rofl: (runs away, really fast)
 
  • #21
Monique said:
How do you know I've got a charming accent? :wink:
:rofl:

oh, I'm bad :rofl: (runs away, really fast)
You know, that just makes me want to chase... :wink:
 
  • #22
It's amazing to see how fast this thread is gathering replies...

Well, firstly, I think most people will classify me as ultra physics nerds (even among my physics nerdy friends), since I study Saturday - Sunday and loves to talk about physics all day. So I'll be in a good position to answer this question.

To be honest, whoever likes me for who I am and are intelligent are good enough. It doesn't have to be ultra intelligent... being able to understand physics jokes would be an extra plus. Also, I don't like the propaganda religious type... for obvious reasons.

Edit: thinking about it a bit more (expanding my mind to include all kinds of people)... that person also needs to have an open mind, have an interest in general knowledge and the world around us. Being humanistic sums it up I think.

(man...when my friends find out this reply, they'll surely make fun of me. Sometimes I regret making my user-name too explicit.. )
 
Last edited:
  • #23
misgfool said:
How can an intelligent woman be a believer? What does the previous statement imply?

Myopic, much?


I really can't describe what I'd find in a girl, neither can I really describe myself as a nerd. However, if it mattered, someone who isn't myopic and can focus on a conversation and be somewhat empathetic to me. Oddly enough, this disqualifies every girl I've been interested in!
 
  • #24
If a girl asked (nerdy me) in engineering school, "what do you want in a woman?" the literal answer would have gotten me a slap or a quick date...
 
  • #25
turbo-1 said:
If a girl asked (nerdy me) in engineering school, "what do you want in a woman?" the literal answer would have gotten me a slap or a quick date...
:rofl: Funny, that answer occurred to me too, but she said no.
 
  • #26
1. Intelligence
2. Humor (Sarcastic, Dark, Nerdy/Quirky) ( No slapstick or stereotype jokes)
3. Self Assured
4. Appearance ( not obese, doesn't have a manly jaw (lots of American Women have manly jaw lines for some reason), and no lemon blond hair)
5. No pointless bitching. I've noticed a lot of dumb people like to do that. Whether its at work, school, or social settings. People just like to *****. About professors, classes, work shifts, term papers, relatives. They complain about the same things over and over and over, p***es me off.

The rest of the criteria are too broad and vague for me to be able to consciously write them down. And would probably differ from nerd to nerd very much. It is just a hunch of mine, but I would guess that nerds would have the same taste discriminations or list of things that would disqualify a girl but what actually attracts each individual one would be too variable.
 
  • #27
Evo said:
I always had to ask the nerdy guys out myself. I would just go up to them and ask "where are you taking me Friday night?" It always worked. You will find that nerdy guys will answer a direct question.

Are you sure. I thought most nerdy guys would implode when that line was delivered.
 
  • #28
I think approaching the guy initially is the best answer. It doesn't really matter what that guy is looking for (we're all different... honest :uhh:) that's what dating is about, but I suppose the type of man you're after will be shy and unable to ask you out himself.
 
  • #29
Ghost803 said:
5. No pointless bitching. I've noticed a lot of dumb people like to do that. Whether its at work, school, or social settings. People just like to *****. About professors, classes, work shifts, term papers, relatives. They complain about the same things over and over and over, p***es me off.
Me too. I can't stand people like that.
 
  • #30
jimmysnyder said:
If you persist in looking for one of them, then as Evo suggests, give them no room for maneuver. Given a choice, they wilt.

:rofl:

That could prove troublesome later on in a relationship.
 
  • #31
Topher925 said:
And last, she has to be an atheist or at least agnostic. This one really disqualifies most girls but I can't deal with the religious propaganda anymore. I honestly have never met a girl that met all three of these qualities, which is why I haven't had a gf in the past couple years. If I met a girl that did, chances are that I would marry her.

Bit of a high order there don't you think Topher? :eek:

Is the atheist thing set in stone or is a girl who isn't officially atheist but doesn't really believe in god ok? Or a girl who is religious but doesn't throw the "propaganda" at you and keeps it to herself? This is coming from a non-religious guy and in no way is it an attack! I am just kinda curious.
 
  • #32
Kurdt said:
Are you sure. I thought most nerdy guys would implode when that line was delivered.
They always looked like a deer caught in headlights for the first few seconds, but then they'd ask me where I wanted to go.

Except for one, a math nerd at Rice. He was drop dead gorgeous and didn't know it. He told me that he already had plans for Friday, so what about Saturday instead?
 
  • #33
MissSilvy said:
Let's turn the tables for a second: what qualities do 'nerdy' boys like in girls?

I love 'nerdy' boys and I'm very lucky that my school is quite science and tech focused. However, a lot of them are incredibly cute and endearing but very shy and give off mixed signals. With other guys, it's fairly straight forward but I know quite a few self-professed 'dorks' that I would go out to dinner with if only they'd ask.

There have been numerous threads on what girls like in guys, but now I'm asking the opposite question; what do smart guys like yourselves like in girls? If possible, I'd be interested in opinions on or from college-aged guys. Thanks!

('Sex' is not an answer. Nice try, PF but I'm looking for more subtle points :))

i think all you need do is show more than a casual interest. don't play games, just signal your interest with body and spoken language. first of all, smile and make eye contact. start a conversation and feign interest in his geek speak. once you've established he might be interested, break the touch barrier and start using some sexual innuendo in your speech and body language.

you chicks have it a lot easier than you realize, you know.
 
  • #34
Well-prepared women were sweet. There was a very tall, attractive, leggy blonde in my dining hall, who I'd see frequently. One day early in my freshman year (hers, too) I wandered over and asked if she minded if I ate my lunch with her. She pulled out the chair right next to her and said that she had been saving that seat for me. We got so close that we were inseperable. We had similar interests in art , music, poetry, and ended spending all our spare time together.
 
  • #35
NBAJam100 said:
Bit of a high order there don't you think Topher? :eek:

Is the atheist thing set in stone or is a girl who isn't officially atheist but doesn't really believe in god ok? Or a girl who is religious but doesn't throw the "propaganda" at you and keeps it to herself? This is coming from a non-religious guy and in no way is it an attack! I am just kinda curious.

Its a VERY high order. But I'm picky and I don't want to spend the time and the money with someone who I will have no future with again. It just isn't worth it.

Someone who isn't really an atheist and doesn't really believe in god is "agnostic", which I already said was ok. Its sort of like the first step towards atheism. If a girl does believe in god, then personally I believe that she will atomically be violating quality 1 along with quality 3.

I will probably never find anyone and die alone, but at least I will have time for my part time job as an international spy. :cool:

you chicks have it a lot easier than you realize, you know.

You can say that again.
 
<h2>1. What qualities do nerdy guys look for in a girl?</h2><p>Nerdy guys often look for intelligence, a good sense of humor, shared interests, and a genuine personality in a girl. They also appreciate someone who is open-minded and curious about the world.</p><h2>2. Do nerdy guys prefer a certain appearance in girls?</h2><p>Nerdy guys do not have a specific preference for appearance in girls. They are more interested in a girl's personality and shared interests. However, many nerdy guys do appreciate someone who takes care of themselves and presents themselves well.</p><h2>3. Are nerdy guys attracted to outgoing or introverted girls?</h2><p>Nerdy guys can be attracted to both outgoing and introverted girls. It ultimately depends on the individual preferences of the guy. Some may enjoy the energy and social skills of an outgoing girl, while others may appreciate the quiet and thoughtful nature of an introverted girl.</p><h2>4. Do nerdy guys like girls who are into the same nerdy things as them?</h2><p>Many nerdy guys do appreciate a girl who shares their interests and passions. However, it is not a requirement for them to be interested in the same things. They may also enjoy introducing their interests to someone who is open to learning about them.</p><h2>5. How can I attract a nerdy guy?</h2><p>The best way to attract a nerdy guy is to be yourself and show genuine interest in their passions and hobbies. Be confident in your intelligence and don't be afraid to engage in deep conversations. Also, don't be afraid to show your own nerdy side and share your own interests with them.</p>

1. What qualities do nerdy guys look for in a girl?

Nerdy guys often look for intelligence, a good sense of humor, shared interests, and a genuine personality in a girl. They also appreciate someone who is open-minded and curious about the world.

2. Do nerdy guys prefer a certain appearance in girls?

Nerdy guys do not have a specific preference for appearance in girls. They are more interested in a girl's personality and shared interests. However, many nerdy guys do appreciate someone who takes care of themselves and presents themselves well.

3. Are nerdy guys attracted to outgoing or introverted girls?

Nerdy guys can be attracted to both outgoing and introverted girls. It ultimately depends on the individual preferences of the guy. Some may enjoy the energy and social skills of an outgoing girl, while others may appreciate the quiet and thoughtful nature of an introverted girl.

4. Do nerdy guys like girls who are into the same nerdy things as them?

Many nerdy guys do appreciate a girl who shares their interests and passions. However, it is not a requirement for them to be interested in the same things. They may also enjoy introducing their interests to someone who is open to learning about them.

5. How can I attract a nerdy guy?

The best way to attract a nerdy guy is to be yourself and show genuine interest in their passions and hobbies. Be confident in your intelligence and don't be afraid to engage in deep conversations. Also, don't be afraid to show your own nerdy side and share your own interests with them.

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