What is wrong with men?!?


by honestrosewater
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honestrosewater
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#307
Jan25-06, 10:59 PM
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Quote Quote by Schrodinger's Dog
Well to be honest people who ask the question: what is wrong with men?: usually should also ask in equal measure what is wrong with themselves
By the way, the title was just a joke, in case anyone missed that.
Astronuc
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Jan25-06, 11:35 PM
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Quote Quote by honestrosewater
By the way, the title was just a joke, in case anyone missed that.
I would hope by now it's obvious the title was tongue-in-cheek.

Schrodinger's Dog has a good point - what is wrong with themselves - but the important questions are: 1) what do I want in a relationship, and 2) what do I have to offer and will offer in a relationship. One must be congizant of one's needs and wants, and also what another's needs and wants are.

The needs and wants also change with age.

Teenagers are in the stage of going from being fully dependent children to independent adults, while simultaneously dealing with the development of sexuality. And therein lies many of the problems.

Young adults are either starting jobs or obtaining advanced education leading to better careers. Still they are dealing with issues from childhood and sexual tension. Then there is the issue of teenagers having children.

At some point, adults get married and that often leads to children. Here a secure relationship is vital - and unfortunately 60% of first marriages fail. It is more troubling when children are involved, because one spouse, usually the mother is left struggling to raise the children.

Even if a marriage is successful, once the children are nearing maturity, adults find themselves older. In relationships which have deferred issues to raise the children, old problems arise with new ones, and needs and wants may have changed.

Then the children leave, and two parents are again alone, 20+ years older than when the children were born. It takes a good relationship from the very beginning to sustain a long term marriage.

Also the needs of men and women vary with age. Older men wanting children for the first time, will want younger women. Older women beyond a certain age may not want children, or face increasing health risk if they try to have children. And then there is issue of an older parent raising an infant and young child. It does happen, and it can be successful.

Men and women in their late 50's and on may simply be looking more for companionship, and perhaps there are still those who still need 'someone to take care of them.'

Just some thoughts to consider.
Schrodinger's Dog
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Jan26-06, 03:07 AM
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yeah I see it as being jokey but at the same time if you're are asking that question even in jest (where many a true word is spoken) then as is so often the case with loaded questions your gonna have to ask yourself why you asked it in the first place. As far as I see it(no expert in relationships myself by a long, long shot) most people start off with preconcieved notions of what they want out of a man or a woman that a man or woman never lives up to. We learn slowly to accept that our true love is not going to wander into our lives every day we feel lonely.

Relationships are about compromise as I said before. Finding that perfect match takes alot of hard work for most, sometimes Juliet or Romeo wanders into your life and you get married age 14 and sometimes you get married age 50. Just seems to be the way it works.


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