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Omg, I cant socialize

by Physics is Phun
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Physics is Phun
#1
Feb7-06, 07:13 PM
P: 94
I'm gonna become an old, wifeless, friendless, cat-ful man before I know it. I can't seem to form meaningful relationships with anyone. I'm not really introverted, I can meet people, and small talk all right, but I can't seem to get into a real conversation with anyone. Often, if I see a friend on the street, I don't say anything cause I just think to myself, what would I say that isn't stupid. I don't know, but I have to do something to change before it's too late. Do other people feel this way? or am I just a not so smart nerd that is never gonna be able to have a relationship with anyone ???
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jimmy p
#2
Feb7-06, 07:25 PM
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Oh, you are talking my language. I have recently discovered the joys of going out (it's taken two years to go out and enjoy myself and not get horribly drunk), I go with my cousin, and occasionally one of the members of my band (). We go to a rock club. My cousin and the band member know people so go off and chat with them. I can make small talk with their friends which usually is "where is x?" and then I have nothing to say to them. I know no-one in the club, and as it is a small place, everyone else seems to know everyone, apart from me, and I don't know how to get into these social circles. Hanging around and being someone who tags along doesn't really work, but I have nothing to say to them. I haven't made any contact with girls in over 6 months, as in I haven't talked to a girl I don't know.

At my age, my parents were married, and while I wouldn't want to be married at 20, it does nag at me a bit that their generation seemed to find happiness, love, friends and careers at a young age, and all I have is friends at the moment.

But then again there is something exciting about growing old and being cat-ful.
TheStatutoryApe
#3
Feb7-06, 07:34 PM
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I find I generally don't know what to say myself. I think it's mainly because my life is really boring at the moment and most of the people I know aren't very interested in those things that I am interested in.

Physics is Phun
#4
Feb7-06, 07:35 PM
P: 94
Omg, I cant socialize

It's not just a girl thing for me. Infact, I might ever go as far as saying I am better at talking to girls. Atleast they have stuff to say... usually.
I'm not really into sports, not anything people talk about anyways, I don't specifically like any music genre, I listen to music alot, but I don't really 'know' music, and can't talk about it much. I can have the odd convo about movies here and there. but other than that, I have nothing to say!!! What the hell is wrong with me???
Physics is Phun
#5
Feb7-06, 07:37 PM
P: 94
TSA are you OK with that? I just don't know. I'm 18 and i'm starting to realize my life could become extremely boring unless I make it otherwise, it's not gonna happen on it's own, but I don't know what to do to keep it from happening.
TheStatutoryApe
#6
Feb7-06, 07:46 PM
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Quote Quote by Physics is Phun
TSA are you OK with that? I just don't know. I'm 18 and i'm starting to realize my life could become extremely boring unless I make it otherwise, it's not gonna happen on it's own, but I don't know what to do to keep it from happening.
I think that my life is currently boring mainly because my job is really boring. I'm actually really embarassed about my job and lack of income which makes it somewhat difficult for me to socialize. I also came into a pretty long running slump being depressed and haven't been able to pull myself out yet. I think I'll eventually get back into the swing of things but for the most part I will still probbaly have little to talk to most people about. There are definitely people out there though that are interested in the same sorts of things I am, they're just hard to find. I'm sure that you'll find there are actually people out there that you can find something to talk about with too.
rachmaninoff
#7
Feb7-06, 07:53 PM
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Quote Quote by jimmy p
...Hanging around and being someone who tags along doesn't really work...
Yes it does. You're not doing it right.
jimmy p
#8
Feb7-06, 07:56 PM
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Quote Quote by rachmaninoff
Yes it does. You're not doing it right.
There are ways?
CosminaPrisma
#9
Feb7-06, 08:07 PM
P: 96
Yeah, just go along with what the group is doing, ask questions & act interested, expand your horizons...you'd be suprised.
zoobyshoe
#10
Feb7-06, 08:16 PM
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Quote Quote by Physics is Phun
Often, if I see a friend on the street, I don't say anything cause I just think to myself, what would I say that isn't stupid.
Conversation isn't about avoiding saying stuff that's stupid. 80% of most conversations probably qualifies as stupid, in that no one is saying much profound, intellectual, or of any real importance in the grand scheme of things. People are just checking in with each other, passing the latest info, no matter how boring or unimportant it probably is.
ShawnD
#11
Feb7-06, 08:33 PM
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Quote Quote by jimmy p
Hanging around and being someone who tags along doesn't really work
Admitting that tag alongs are jackasses is the first step towards being a better person.

It's ok to say stupid things as long as it's sort of understood that you're not serious.
Pengwuino
#12
Feb7-06, 08:44 PM
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I'm a tremendous socializer. I have many friends, they are awesome, i am the center of attention.
Evo
#13
Feb7-06, 08:49 PM
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Quote Quote by Pengwuino
I'm a tremendous socializer. I have many friends, they are awesome, i am the center of attention.
Did you get the keys to the contributor's hottub and there is a Ferrari for you guys, you know. Check with yomamma, he's the last one on the log.
Pengwuino
#14
Feb7-06, 08:52 PM
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Quote Quote by Evo
Did you get the keys to the contributor's hottub and there is a Ferrari for you guys, you know. Check with yomamma, he's the last one on the log.
What a life I lead
franznietzsche
#15
Feb7-06, 08:57 PM
P: 1,783
Quote Quote by Pengwuino
I'm a tremendous socializer. I have many friends, they are awesome, i am the center of attention.

Read: "I'm an attention whore. Hey why aren't you listening!!! LISTEN TO ME!!!"


I'm easily bored by most people. Really. 80% of my friends are other physics majors now. And the few that aren't just happen to be major geeks.
jimmy p
#16
Feb7-06, 08:57 PM
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Quote Quote by ShawnD
Admitting that tag alongs are jackasses is the first step towards being a better person.
I like that, it makes sense!
Physics is Phun
#17
Feb8-06, 06:45 AM
P: 94
lol. I am such a tag along :P I always feel like, if I wasn't here right now, no one would care, or miss me.
OMG, I'm off to the pound... gotta get me some cats :)
CosminaPrisma
#18
Feb8-06, 07:41 AM
P: 96
How do you stop being a tag a long and find friends where you aren't a tag a long, I've had this problem at points in my life too....


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