Patent # 4,669,216

zoobyshoe

"High tech mousing that not only kills but crushes and incinerates the victim is offered in a trap devised by Texan Ted M. Moss. His enclosed apparatus lures a doomed rodent into a cylindrical chamber with bait. An electric eye senses the presence of the mouse and actuates a spring driven vertical harpoon that spears the creature on the spot. Once dead, the mouse is crushed between two flat metal plates to a thickness of about three-sixteenths of an inch and incinerated by an electric coil. The trap then automatically places another morsel in the bait chamber and resets itself to harpoon the next small intruder."

-Inventive Genius
Library of Curious and Unusual Facts
Time-Life books, 1991

Ivan Seeking

Finger gaurd for patent #4,669,216.

zoobyshoe

Mouse ash scraper for patent # 4,669,216

zoobyshoe

Mouse harpoon sharpener for patent # 4,699,216

Ivan Seeking

MouseBeGone Room Deodorizer.

zoobyshoe

"Are your guests uncomfortable with the odor of burning hair and seared flesh your Moss Mouse Masher creates?

Try MouseBeGone™ Room Deodorizer today!"

Ivan Seeking

MouseBeGone Room Deodorizer Neutralizer

Special Note: According to Federal Mandate 21233.33_11_1.4699216 part c

Njorl

"The flattened and roasted rodent is then placed on a soft whole wheat tortilla with sundried tomatoes, arugala and parmesean cheese. It is served with your choice of medium soft drink. It is the McMousetrap mousewrap. Available for a limited time only.

Njorl

Evo

Life would be so boring without you guys.

motai

And soon Subway will introduce a low-carb version of the roasted rodent, this time it is on a carb-friendly Atkins (R) Wrap. Dieters can eat mice and lose weight!

zoobyshoe

"While supply lasts, or untill we get our A rating back from the health department."

Ivan Seeking

APP News General Release: Due to the overwhelming success and health benefits of the "McMousetrap mousewrap", the "carb-friendly Atkins (R) Wrap", and the most successful marketing slogan in history, "Everybody Needs Mouse", the Disney Co. announced today the release of a its newest product to spin off from the so called "critter craze": A new soft drink that comes with proof of spectacular health benefits and called "The Real Mickey". The drink is available in fine strained form or for you heartier drinkers, with the pulp.

zoobyshoe

I drink it for the fiber!

Ivan Seeking

I drink it every day. Like the label says, "it keeps you squeaky clean".

Ivan Seeking

The Real Mickey Home Brew Kit

(Mouse trap - Patent # 4,669,216 - and The Mouse Ash scraper - patent # 4,669,216.2 purchased separately)

Njorl

Bah! With all these fast-food mouse places opening up, you just can't good mouse anymore.

Njorl

Atrius

Ferret, hampster and gerbil guards, so you don't kill your own pets