# Lame Jokes

by quddusaliquddus
Tags: jokes, lame
 PF Patron Sci Advisor Emeritus P: 12,470 Did you hear about the gay internet? Just type C:[Enter]
 P: 2,059 Here's a good one I made myself: If God had meant for man to count higher than 1,048,575, he would have given him more fingers and toes.
 P: 398 What does a lemon strapped to a wheel look like? A car!
P: 69
 Windows NT crashed. I am the Blue Screen of Death. No one hears your screams.
very popular with windows

Yesterday it worked.
Today it is not working.
Windows is like that.

It might be very useful.
But now it is gone.

Three things are certain:
Death, taxes and lost data.
Guess which has occurred.

http://www.rickyseabra.com/windows_haiku.html

Did you hear about the fish that went deaf?

What did one teddy bear say to the other teddy bear when he offered him some dessert?
No thanks, I'm stuffed.

i could bring an end to this topic, by posting this link http://rinkworks.com/jokes/

@MK: oh but what about 12345678910, thats easy to count using your fingers
 PF Patron P: 3,666 I can never remember jokes, where any of these funny?
 P: 231 Why did the monkey fall off the tree? Because it was dead.
 PF Patron HW Helper P: 1,198 Why did the chicken cross the mobius strip?
P: 318
 Quote by BobG What's so funny about the first derivative of: $$f(x)=\frac{r^3}{3}$$ In white: f'(x)= (3r^2)/3*dr = r^2 dr = r r dr = r dr r (From The Simpsons, episode number 2)
That's not a derivative, that's a differential.
P: 318
 Quote by siddharth Why did the chicken cross the mobius strip?
Short cut.
P: 126
 Quote by jimmy p That reminds me of a combined joke.... 1.)Why did the elephant paint its testicles red? To hide in the cherry tree 2.)What is the loudest noise in the jungle? A giraffe eating cherries.
Which reminds me of ...

1) How do you get an elephant in a refrigerator?
Open the door, put him in, close the door.

2) How do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator?
Open the door, take out the elephant, put in the giraffe, close the door.

3) The jungle has a meeting, who doesn't attend?
The giraffe, he's still in the refrigerator.

4) How do you cross a river inhabited by snakes?
Walk (or swim) right through it; all the snakes are at the meeting.

In retrospect ... I'm not even sure that was a joke.
 P: 398 2) How do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? Open the door, take out the elephant, put in the giraffe, close the door. You chop of its head
 P: 1,136 Favourite bad jokes of all time:- What did Hitler say to his men before they got in their tanks? Men get in your tanks. ----- How do you make gold soup? add 24 carrots/carats. ----- Why are their no asparin in the jungle? Because the parots eat 'em all (paracetemol) ----- Can't get enough of Christmas cracker classics.
 PF Patron P: 737 ^^Those are terrible
 P: 69 FOR THE ENGLISH!!! what is brown, and comes out of cows bacwards? the southampto ferry (cows to Cowes) there are 2 fish in a tank, 1 says to the other- how do you drive this thing
 P: 398 What is the difference between a cow and a potatoe? None.
 PF Patron Sci Advisor Emeritus P: 12,470 The latest study of the new "Viagra for women" indicates that indeed, four out of five woman taking the drug can fake it more effectively.
 HW Helper Sci Advisor P: 1,572 ... A man was sitting at home one evening, when the doorbell rang. When he answered the door, a 6 foot tall cockroach was standing there. The cockroach immediately punched him between the eyes and scampered off. The next evening, the man was sitting at home when the doorbell rang again. When he answered the door, the cockroach was there again. This time, it punched him, kicked him and karate chopped him before running away. The third evening, the man was sitting at home when the doorbell rang. When he answered the door, the cockroach was there yet again. It leapt at him and stabbed him several times before running off. The gravely injured man managed to crawl to the telephone and summoned an ambulance. He was rushed to intensive care, where they saved his life. The next morning, the doctor was doing his rounds. He asked the man what happened, so the man explained about the 6 foot cockroach's attacks, culminating in the near fatal stabbing. The doctor thought for a moment and said, "Yes, there's a nasty bug going around."
 PF Patron Sci Advisor P: 2,188 One of my all time favs Two Romans standing in Alps circa 218 BC 1st Roman: "look a flock of elephants!" 2nd Roman: "Herd" 1st Roman: "Herd of what?" 2nd Roman: "Herd of elephants" 1st Roman: "Yes of course, there's a flock of them over there!"

 Related Discussions Academic Guidance 5 General Discussion 12 General Discussion 14 Current Events 11 General Discussion 28