Would you date a non-scientist?

causalset

Whenever I have a girlfriend I always feel ashamed to tell about her to my parents. I am also afraid of marriage. It seems like if it gets to this point the life will be over. I could never properly explain to any of my girls why is it I am afraid of these things.

Just recently I was in a banquet in strings conference and they told a joke about a guy and a girl breaking up because one was in string theory and the other was in loop quantum gravity. And the first thing I thought was "man, arent they lucky". In my case none of the girls I dated were physicists. The closest I got was a biochemist and even then she is not a theorist; she is very industry oriented as evidenced by the fact that eventually she chose to leave grad school (with a master) in favor of industry.

Now that this got my attention, I asked myself: what if I were to date a theoretical physicist with a ph.d., working on my level; would I have any of these fears? My honest answer is that I dont know; I have to see. But the fact that it is "conceivable" that I will NOT have these fears is pretty amaising, given that I could never imagine myself without these fears for the past few years, no matter how hard the girls pushed me to change. The reason why I would feel a lot more at ease dating a physicist is that I wont have to "step out of my life" the way I do now, will I? Even MARRYING a physicist wont be such a big of a leap.

Could it be that THIS is why none of the girls understand my fears? THEY would not date someone "far off on the left field" to begin with. I am the only one being desperate and going for girls I am not compatible with, simply because the girls I WANT to date (such as a math graduate student I ran onto few years ago) dont want to date me. So this explains why none of the girls I do date understand any of my fears. Perhaps they feel about me the same way as I would feel about theoretical physicist (they wont have been dating me if they didnt). And if I were to date a theoretical physicist, I would be A LOT more comfortable and marriage or anything of this kind would pretty much be non-event.

This brings me to asking you guys: would YOU personally ever date a non-physicist, or non-scientist? If most people in science community would NOT date the kind of girls I am dating, then I do in fact have a very good reason to worry!

cristo

My girlfriend is not a scientist. Personally, I don't have such criteria in mind; in fact, I doubt I'd like to date someone who does what I do, simply because conversations will then always be about work.

I think you need to step back, stop over-analysing people before you talk to them, and start dating someone you get on with and can have a laugh with.

zoobyshoe

It wouldn't occur to me to want, much less require, a woman who was conversant with what I did all day long. I'd probably prefer a girlfriend who represented a break from all that, who offered all the human experiences that daily work didn't provide.

Pengwuino

God. I'd shoot myself if I had to date not just solely in the sciences, but solely a physicist!

What next? She has to have the same color hair as me? same shoe size? eat the same food? If physics is determining who you marry, you need to take a step back. I know there are some people who would disagree with me, but it's not THAT important.

Dembadon

/like

My wife isn't a scientist, and I'm lucky to have her heart.

BobG

I'd prefer to date someone that had at least a bachelor's degree, but, to be honest, a successful career would be more important than the degree.

Aw, who am I kidding? I'd date a stripper if she at least said she had a Physics, PhD.

zoobyshoe

I don't think Feynman would have been so stringent.

daveb

I'm dating a non-scientist (in the traditional sense) right now. What's more important to me is a healthily skeptical curiousity about the universe.

fluidistic

This poll is broken.
16 voters only and... tons of votes. No need to count them but you clearly see that there are more than 16 votes on the graphic.
Also... I can't believe that it's so tight. Almost all people voted on all the choices. This is ridiculous, flawed.
P.S.:I voted for no minimal requirement, except the fact of her being a woman.

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zoobyshoe

Very hinkey, yes.

Astronuc

Consider dating a psychologist.

I once dated a woman who only had a GED. I was quite serious about her, but the relationship was complicated, and we went our separate ways.

Actually, my wife has degrees in psychology.

Evo

The vote was set so that each member could vote for every category. That means each member can vote 15 times. So that is correct.

fluidistic

Ah I see! Now I get it :D

G01

Personally, I would prefer a girlfriend who wasn't a scientist. I want someone who can expand my horizons and introduce me to other interesting and valuable pursuits.

KingNothing

I mainly care about looks.

Constantinos

I believe this question is meaningless.

We all pick with different criteria. There are people who only care about... the more physical side of a relationship and therefore have no use for academic qualifications. Others want more intimacy and could feel better if they could discuss everyday work problems with their significant others. How can you meaningfully compare the choices of these two? What meaningful information can you gain from such a comparison or from the preferences of others seen in the poll?

Perhaps a better question would be "Would you date a non-scientist IF what you look for in a relationship is so-and-so"

Lisa!

Well if that's the case, you have to agree that almost any comparison question is meaningless since people have different tastes and if the majority of them like something that can't help you to like it as well