At how much of a disadvantage with women is a 5'8 guy?

[Jamin2112]

At how much of a disadvantage with women is a 5'8" guy?

Five-eighter here. I realize I don't have a physical presence that signals dominance.

 

[Evo]

None, IMO.

 

[Jamin2112]

None, IMO.

C'mon ...

 

[ZombieFeynman]

I know men who are 5'8'' or shorter that have plenty of success with women. I know men who are taller than that who have nearly none. (and certainly the other way around!)

I think a lack of confidence due to anything (one's height, for example) can CERTAINLY hinder a man's chances with a woman.

Are there women who look specifically for a man who is quite tall? One can only imagine there are, just as there are men who look for specific physical attributes in a woman.

I would not worry about it.

 

[SW VandeCarr]

Tom Cruise is 5'7". You would rank in the upper half of this list of Hollywood actors under 6'.

www.floatingpath.com/2012/12/19/hollywood-actors-short/

(Click on image to enlarge).

 

[I like Serena]

Personally I think that being self assured, relaxed, assertive, and showing initiative are more important.

But here's what I found after a short google search:

of the 720 couples in their study, only one was comprised of a taller woman and a shorter man (Gillis & Avis, 1980).taller men were more likely to have at least one biological child compared to shorter men (Pawlowski, Dunbar, & Lipowicz, 2000).women with more “traditional” gender role expectations were less willing to date shorter men (Salska, et al., 2008).

http://www.eharmony.com/dating-advice/dating/why-do-women-all-seem-to-want-taller-men/

 

[bp_psy]

isn't 5'8''-5'9'' the average male height?
Anyway real men show their physical dominance by growling ferociously and by showing their fangs. Works like a charm.

 

[Jimmy Snyder]

I don't know much about these things so I asked my wife. I'm sorry to say there's not much hope for you. According to her, 5'6" is the only good male height.

 

[Jack21222]

The fact that you're concerned about your height is what will put you at a disadvantage, not your height.

 

[collinsmark]

Five-eighter here. I realize I don't have a physical presence that signals dominance.

'Don't know what you mean by "dominance" in this context, but 5'8" is nothing out of the ordinary. Plenty of historical heroes, villains, saviors, and even megalomaniacs have been roughly 5'8" (give or take a bit).

None, IMO.

Wow.

 

[russ_watters]

C'mon ...

I'm 5'7 and I've had several girls/women tell me its a disadvantage.

 

[HeLiXe]

None, IMO.

:rofl::rofl: love it

 

[HeLiXe]

I think a lack of confidence due to anything (one's height, for example) can CERTAINLY hinder a man's chances with a woman.

I think this is soo true

Are there women who look specifically for a man who is quite tall? One can only imagine there are,

Yep...one here. Although I don't really look for men :-/ Tall guys get my attention quicker than short ones and I am also quite short.

Personally I think that being self assured, relaxed, assertive, and showing initiative are more important.

But here's what I found after a short google search:

http://www.eharmony.com/dating-advice/dating/why-do-women-all-seem-to-want-taller-men/

Yes but this is true. I usually like tall guys and I once really liked this guy who was only 5'6". He was moderately confident, very funny, and extremely good at writing. His poetry was awesome. I only found out about his shortness complex when he discovered I started to date a guy who is 6'4".

Jamin, I don't think being 5'8" would really be a problem for you...the dominance thing might be with some women. I don't know many women who look for dominance in a man as much as self assurance, self sufficiency, and kindness.

 

[rootX]

You have to look at multiple things not just height.. like weight, face symmetry and so on :tongue2:

 

[Monique]

The tallest average height for a female world wide is in The Netherlands and is 5' 6.4, the average male in Canada or France is 5' 8.5. Why would you feel you're at a disadvantage for your height of 5' 8?

 

[Jamin2112]

'Don't know what you mean by "dominance" in this context

Well you always hear that taller men are more sexually attractive because evolutionary psychology holds that blah blah blah. (Which doesn't make sense. If women were really going after the genetically "fittest" on earth, then in this day and age they'd be going after guys with a high IQ, that is, nerds.)

 

[Jamin2112]

The tallest average height for a female world wide is in The Netherlands and is 5' 6.4, the average male in Canada or France is 5' 8.5. Why would you feel you're at a disadvantage for your height of 5' 8?

I don't live in France or Canada. I live in the United States where the average male height is 5'9.5". Keep in mind also that it's a normal curve, so 5'8" is like bottom 30% and if were to control for White males (since Asians and Mexicans heavily skew the average lower), it's more like bottom 20%.

 

[Monique]

Ok, but then still only 10% of women in the United States are taller than you:
http://www.census.gov/compendia/statab/2012/tables/12s0209.pdf

 

[Jamin2112]

Ok, but then still only 10% of women in the United States are taller than you:
http://www.census.gov/compendia/statab/2012/tables/12s0209.pdf

But they want a guy who's at least a few inches taller than they are. So I'd say my range is ≤5'3", which is the bottom 30.4%.

 

[daveyrocket]

Just make a joke about how instead of growing taller, you had extra growth below your waistline. Then you're in for sure.

 

[Jamin2112]

Just make a joke about how instead of growing taller, you had extra growth below your waistline. Then you're in for sure.

 

[Jimmy Snyder]

So I'd say my range is ≤5'3", which is the bottom 30.4%.

I'd say you just lost that demographic too.

 

[Monique]

But they want a guy who's at least a few inches taller than they are.

Really, you think that's what women want?

 

[ZombieFeynman]

I still think this is a silly thing to worry about.

But if you're really concerned about the whole looking dominant thing, I'm afraid adding a few inches to your height is probably out of the cards. Adding another few inches to your biceps/chest/shoulders on the other hand is probably in the range of possibilities...

 

[Astronuc]

Five-eighter here. I realize I don't have a physical presence that signals dominance.

That statement seems to reflect an insecurity or lack of confidence. I'm about the same height, and it has never been a disadvantage, nor was I ever concerned about 'dominance'. I dated girls/women of varying heights, some shorter, some about the same height or slightly taller. No problems.

 

[Jamin2112]

Really, you think that's what women want?

Yes. There was a study that showed most women would rather date a guy who has been to prison than a guy who is less than 2 inches taller than them.

 

[Jamin2112]

But if you're really concerned about the whole looking dominant thing, I'm afraid adding a few inches to your height is probably out of the cards. Adding another few inches to your biceps/chest/shoulders on the other hand is probably in the range of possibilities...

You guys are clueless. If you're short and look like you lift weights obsessively, then you're viewed as trying to compensate for lack of height.

 

[zoobyshoe]

Jamin2112, you're a blessing to other guys! With your strong instinct for psychological self-sabotage any other reasonably confident guy will seem preferable.

 

[ZombieFeynman]

You guys are clueless. If you're short and look like you lift weights obsessively, then you're viewed as trying to compensate for lack of height.

Or concerned about your health and physical well-being

I don't understand.

Some Women here have said it didn't matter to them personally.

Men have shared either observations about other men of similar height and/or their own stories of being similar height.

People have offered other suggestions.

You insist on a pity party.

You essentially cannot change your height. You must face this fact. It's truly not the end of the world.

Further anecdote:
A close friend of mine is around your height. I've seen him have successful long term relationships with women his height and taller. He's now engaged to a lovely young woman who's tiny compared to him. It doesn't matter what size he was or they were. He's a charismatic guy. He's a good guy. Good people wouldn't care whether he was five foot, five foot eight, or six feet eight. They'd see him as just an awesome fella.

 

[I like Serena]

Women here have said it didn't matter to them personally.

Hmm, that's not what I got from this.
It's only Evo and Monique who said they did not care.
I suspect they are not representative.
And now I'm curious whether the father of Evo's children wasn't about 4 inches taller...

 

[ZombieFeynman]

Hmm, that's not what I got from this.
It's only Evo and Monique who said they did not care.
I suspect they are not representative.
And now I'm curious whether the father of Evo's children wasn't about 4 inches taller...

Fair enough. My post has been edited to reflect this.

 

[I like Serena]

Oh, and Monique, with her average of 5'6.4" for females in the Netherlands (I found 5'7" from wiki), did not mention that the males are 6'0" on average.
These are apparently the males these women select.

 

[Solute]

I think the main issue with Jamin2112 is that he is not going to places where there are woman. I have the same problem, being in a science related field there are WAY less woman than many other fields. And it gets worse, once you have a job the number of people you interact with daily drop to ~20 and its the same people day in, day out making it really hard to find a good match for yourself. And this spirals in making someones selfconfidence fall. Dating sites don't even work, especially for any age less then 25. Because I feel like a lonely single man (been single for more than a few years), my confidence is reduced, and knowing that woman want a more confident guy, my confidence goes even more down. Even though I have a good job, and various other aspects of my life are great.

 

[ZombieFeynman]

Oh, and Monique, with her average of 5'6.4" for females in the Netherlands (I found 5'7" from wiki), did not mention that the males are 6'0" on average.
These are apparently the males these women select.

I'm still not certain of your point. You quote the average heights of men and women in a specific country.

No offence, but...so what?

 

[daveyrocket]

If you look hard enough, you're going to find every guy has some sort of disadvantage with women. Get over it. I know that's hard to do, because for us sciencey-mathy types, we grow up getting rewards for pointing out where other people are wrong. But it doesn't work that way with women (or much of life). Women can be very forgiving about a man's disadvantages, if she likes what advantages he has. If women were as critical as you are, the human race would have died out long ago.

5'8" is not that short anyway. There are plenty of attractive women who are between 5'0" and 5'4". Don't focus so much on statistics, especially statistics that just deal in averages and say nothing about distributions. They can be very misleading. I've been hit on by women who were 2-3" taller than me.

Yes. There was a study that showed most women would rather date a guy who has been to prison than a guy who is less than 2 inches taller than them.

That doesn't say much. A lot of women don't have anything against dating a guy who's been to prison.

You guys are clueless. If you're short and look like you lift weights obsessively, then you're viewed as trying to compensate for lack of height.

No, most women won't see it that way. Women would think "he's short, but ooh, look at those muscles!" Building muscle takes a lot of work, and people (women included) appreciate that.

I think the main issue with Jamin2112 is that he is not going to places where there are woman. I have the same problem, being in a science related field there are WAY less woman than many other fields. And it gets worse, once you have a job the number of people you interact with daily drop to ~20 and its the same people day in, day out making it really hard to find a good much for yourself. And this spirals in making someones selfconfidence fall. Dating sites don't even work, especially for any age less then 25. Because I feel like a lonely single man (been single for more than a few years), my confidence is reduced, and knowing that woman want a more confident guy, my confidence goes even more down. Even though I have a good job, and various other aspects of my life are great.

Dating sites can work. I've met several women from dating sites, including my girlfriend. But they are not stacked in favor of men. But then neither is dating in general. Try this experiment some time.. make a profile of a hot girl and see how many and what quality of emails she gets. It's enlightening, and it gives you an idea of what you need to do to distinguish yourself from the riffraff.

You need to get out and do something social that women also like to do. Personally, I'm a big advocate of taking some sort of dance lessons to meet women. Men have a numbers advantage there, and most women go to those sorts of things specifically to meet men. You don't even have to be good at it, just being willing to try is enough for some women.

Meeting people doesn't just happen. You *have* to make an effort.