Say 2 observers are moving with a constant non-zero velocity with respect to one another. Each sees the others clock running slow but since they both know about relativity they know that the other is infact aging at the same rate as they are. They just observe otherwise. To the layman this begs the question is the time dilation virtual? For example, say they pass each other and zero clocks at that point. After an hour they both drink a beer. Intuitively, each observer could imagine the other drinking the beer at the same time but they see the other lag behind. Could they then say well, I know he's drinking it, I just can't see it yet? Likewise, couldn't an observer at CERN say well I know that particle has decayed it's just that I can't see it yet? Once you can accept that both observers see the others clock run slow, an understanding of the twins or any other paradox immediately follows. It seems to me that this is the true "paradox" and the sticking point for many. I'm sure that simultaneity is the key but would appreaciate some help.