Beowulf the movie

Beowulf, the movie


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  • #1

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http://www.beowulfmovie.com/ [Broken]

Cons: Beowulf? BEOWULF?? really?
Pros: Angelina Joelie
 
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  • #2
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Correction

Cons: Beowulf? BEOWULF?? really?
Cons: Angelina Joelie
 
  • #3
arildno
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I suppose Angelina Jolie is going to play Grendel's Mum?
 
  • #4
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anybody who watched the original probably cringed when they read this thread's title... you're bringing back repressed memories =)
 
  • #5
Evo
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I suppose Angelina Jolie is going to play Grendel's Mum?
Yep.

It says "offers a unique vision of the Beowulf saga in a way that it has never been told before". :surprised

How many people do you think that will go to see this movie have ever read it? They'll probably think it's another fantasy novel ala LOTR.

Cons: Angelina Jolie
 
  • #6
Cons: Angelina Joelie
Cons: Angelina Jolie
but.. but.. she's all shiny and half naked in the water! and has some sort of tail of evil sexiness! ... you people have no appreciation for true art!


but honestly... "I've come to kill your moonstah!" ... why the british accent? why does ancient=english accent in movies? shouldn't they have some sort of germanic/latin accent? ... I think they should have given Mel Gibson directing rights; he would've had them all speaking Old English, no ifs or buts. ... O well... there's always Gilgamesh :biggrin:
 
  • #7
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but.. but.. she's all shiny and half naked in the water! and has some sort of tail of evil sexiness! ... you people have no appreciation for true art!
:confused: If thats what you want to see rent a porno. Besides, models are much better looking than actresses.
 
  • #8
:confused: If thats what you want to see rent a porno.
now THERE'S a novel idea !:rofl:


BEOWULF: THE PORNO

Starring:
Seymore Butts as— Beowulf
Paris Hilton as— the sword
Ron Jeremy as— The Dragon
Jude Law— just because he's required, by law, to appear in any movie ever made since 2004

Narrated by Morgan Freeman​
 
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  • #9
Math Is Hard
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BEOWULF: THE PORNO

Starring:
Seymore Butts as— Beowulf
Paris Hilton as— the sword
Ron Jeremy as— The Dragon
Jude Law— just because he's required, by law, to appear in any movie ever made since 2004

Narrated by Morgan Freeman​
:rofl::rofl::rofl:
I just spit out my yogurt!
 
  • #10
BobG
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now THERE'S a novel idea !:rofl:


BEOWULF: THE PORNO

Starring:
Seymore Butts as— Beowulf
Paris Hilton as— the sword
Ron Jeremy as— The Dragon
Jude Law— just because he's required, by law, to appear in any movie ever made since 2004

Narrated by Morgan Freeman​
Now I have to see it! :rofl::rofl::rofl:
 
  • #11
Beowulf is one of my favorite stories from English Lit class. I may actually see this! :)
 
  • #12
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The script is written by Neil Gaiman, who is an absolutely fantastic author.

However, Hollywood destroyed a movie which is based on one of his books, 'Stardust', which actually came out today. He didn't write the movie script, however, which was almost 95% completely different than the book.

Beowulf should be good because the story is very good on it's own, and Neil is a fantastic writer.
 
  • #13
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why??? mead hall this, mead hall that.. fin
 
  • #14
arildno
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Yep.

It says "offers a unique vision of the Beowulf saga in a way that it has never been told before". :surprised

How many people do you think that will go to see this movie have ever read it? They'll probably think it's another fantasy novel ala LOTR.

Cons: Angelina Jolie
Just thought of something:

Might Grendel have been a pious Muslim??
After all, music is haraam, no wonder he would be upset by all that noise....
 
  • #15
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anybody who watched the original probably cringed when they read this thread's title... you're bringing back repressed memories =)
Ah, the original! Today's newfangled movies can never surpass the original. It was rather funny with a bleach-headed Christopher Lambert doing flips from an off-screen trampoline. Well, it wasn't supposed to be a comedy but I still laughed a lot. Like when the bailiff from Night Court drops his 5th-century glasses (yes, his glasses) and gets gored by the creature. Or when they wrap up the body and then zip it up (that's right, they zipped it up). Or later in the movie when they lock up all the women and children in a safe room with one guard who then grabs that microphone to anounce "room secured" on the PA system. Well, the creature still kills everyone in the locked room but don't worry: the guard remained safe and sound by the time Beowulf rushed in through the open window. You just can't surpass classic movie making of this kind.
 
  • #16
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I dunno, the trailer looks pretty weak!
 
  • #17
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I have always loved the Beowulf legend. I even liked Crichton's take on it for The 13th Warrior, because it was an interesting way of telling the story. I haven't seen how much or how little this one will follow the original legend, but I'll probably see it one way or another. (And I could care less if Jolie is in it or not).
 

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