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Chuck Norris and maths

  1. Jun 6, 2009 #1
    What maths based facts do we know about Chuck Norris? Here are a few that I know of:

    1) Chuck Norris doesn't do Lagrange multipliers...for him there are no constraints
    2) Chuck Norris can divide by zero
    3) Chuck Norris is the (n+1)th root of all degree n polynomials in x
    4) Chuck Norris has counted to infinity...twice
  2. jcsd
  3. Jun 7, 2009 #2
    Dear god it's a segment of barrens chat all over again
  4. Jun 7, 2009 #3


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    Walker Texas Ranger (Chuck Norris) once rescued 300 head of cattle that had been loaded into two reefer trailers, 40' X 8' X 8'.:bugeye: He's my HERO:biggrin:
  5. Jun 7, 2009 #4
    Normally, I would groan for bringing this old thread up again, however, post number 1 made me yuck!

    Oh chuck norris, when will you ever stop slamming revolving doors.
  6. Jun 7, 2009 #5
    Chuck norris can't add - he is retarded.
  7. Jun 7, 2009 #6
    Epic Fail Post.
  8. Jun 7, 2009 #7


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    Agreed. The guy is a total waste of skin. I can't help suspecting that he and Dubya are secretly brothers.
  9. Jun 7, 2009 #8


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    Staff: Mentor

    5) Chuck Norris knows that AxB = -BxA. Hell, he defined the cross product!
  10. Jun 7, 2009 #9
    Lol, that was the funniest comment in the beginning of this thread, anyway. However, I think that Chuck will always add correctly, because....

    Chuck Norris doesn't need to avoid calculation mistakes. The calculation mistakes avoid him.
  11. Jun 7, 2009 #10
    I feel like I just entered the "twilight zone". What in Newton's name are you guys talking about? :smile:
  12. Jun 7, 2009 #11
    I concur, who gives a flying f&*^* about Norris, he's just a redneck that was in a few movies.
  13. Jun 7, 2009 #12
    There are no such things as physical constants: they just think if they don't move Chuck Norris won't see them.

    Chuck Norris can recite pi - backwards.

    Chuck Norris once fought Yoda, Darth Vader and the Emperor simultaneously. After he'd thrashed them all, he made them draw diagrams showing the Force at every stage of the battle.

    Chuck Norris can isolate magnetic monopoles; he gives them to small orphan children as birthday presents.

    Chuck Norris only combs half of his beard, the rest follows by symmetry.

    Chuck Norris has never climbed Everest. It is too easy. When he wants to go mountaineering, he constructs a Dirac Delta Function out of 4 sheets of graph paper, some dark matter and a large amount of duct tape.

    and some more here.
  14. Jun 8, 2009 #13


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    Chuck Norris is ginger
  15. Jun 8, 2009 #14
    World of Warcraft reference? :)
  16. Jun 8, 2009 #15


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    Guess this is not the maths being discussed. :confused::redface:
  17. Jun 8, 2009 #16


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    Chuck Norris calls it math
  18. Jun 9, 2009 #17
    Jack Bauer has no moral qualms with torturing Chuck Norris.
  19. Jun 9, 2009 #18
    Chuck norris can take the cross product of two scalars
  20. Jun 9, 2009 #19


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    Never was into Chuck, but that is the funniest thing I've seen in this thread :rofl:
  21. Jun 10, 2009 #20


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    Kevin Bacon has a Chuck Norris number of 2.

    Bacon appeared in "VH-1, Behind the Movie (Animal House)" with Judith Belushi-Pisano.

    Belushi-Pisano appeared in "The Big Idea with Donnie Deutsh" with Chuck Norris.

    I happen to have a Norris number of 3.

    I went to high school with Scott Hecker.

    Hecker was supervising sound editor for "Blues Brothers: 2000", starring Dan Aykroyd

    Aykroyd appeared in "The Big Idea with Donnie Deutsh" with Chuck Norris.
    Last edited: Jun 10, 2009
  22. Jun 10, 2009 #21
    Mine is 2.

    Chuck Norris appeared along with Arnold Schwartzenegger in the show "2001 ABC World Stunt Awards" http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0291699/" [Broken]
    I appeared with Arnold Schwartzenegger in the movie Terminator 3. http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0181852/fullcredits#cast"
    Last edited by a moderator: May 4, 2017
  23. Aug 4, 2010 #22
    according to stephen hawking "a black hole will consume every thing around it and will not stop unless chuck norris spits in it"
  24. Aug 4, 2010 #23
    Chuck Norris frequently crosses the event horizon of the black hole at the center of the Milky Way Galaxy to visit his summer condo.
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