Chuck Norris Counts to Infinity Twice

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In summary: Chuck Norris counted to infinity, twice.Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because Chuck Norris only recognizes the element of surprise.When Chuck Norris was born the only person who cried was the doctor. Never slap Chuck Norris.Chuck Norris once ate a whole cake before his friends could tell him there was a stripper in it.Chuck Norris puts his pants on one leg at a time, just like the rest of us. The only difference is, then he kills people.Chuck Norris frequently donates blood to the Red Cross. Just not his own.Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.I think that sums it up pretty well.
  • #71
jkvk94.jpg


 
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  • #72
DevilsAvocado said:
jkvk94.jpg




Holy... moley...

I think I just peed a little. :rofl:
 
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  • #73
DevilsAvocado said:
jkvk94.jpg




What the HELL was that? really what was that?

By the way THIS is the only guy that can kill chuck Norris!

From russia with love

FEDOR EMELIANENKO

[URL]http://www.squabbles.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/06/fedor_emelianenko_cuts.jpg[/URL]

I also found this on you tube check this out

 
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  • #74
nismaratwork said:
Holy... moley...

I think I just peed a little. :rofl:

Are you laughing because you peed or did you peed because you were laughing:yuck:
 
  • #75
nismaratwork said:
Holy... moley...

I think I just peed a little. :rofl:

:biggrin: Check out the video... number 2 will come naturally... :rofl:
 
  • #76
FizixFreak said:
Are you laughing because you peed or did you peed because you were laughing:yuck:

:rofl:

Neither! First, I was joking. Second, the idea is that it was a reaction to absolute terror.

Did you SEE that guy? he looks like he eats people to stay strong, and picks his teeth with their femurs! (leg bone)

@DA: Oh yeah... quite naturally and almost unnoticed. :biggrin:
 
  • #77
FizixFreak said:
What the HELL was that? really what was that?

Well... he IS the http://knowyourmeme.com/memes/technoviking" – the music dance to Technoviking!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=posAGaWVmvw
 
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  • #78
Forget chuck norris forget techno viking this guy is the next big thing

[PLAIN]http://twentyonwards.blogs.com/.a/6a00d834522e1369e2011570521c98970c-800wi

He is the chuck Norris of Pakistan and he is much better the American version.
 
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  • #79
FizixFreak said:
By the way THIS is the only guy that can kill chuck Norris!

From russia with love

FJODOR MELANCHOLIC??

Nah, that doesn’t work... if you are going for a Russian, you might as well get a real Neanderthal:

NIKOLAI VALUEV!
a+nephillumvaluev.jpg

2.13 m (7 ft 0 in)

But that doesn’t work either. Technoviking will dance him to death.

... when he’s done with the Chinese army ...
 
  • #80
FizixFreak said:
Forget chuck norris forget techno viking just guy is the next big thing

[PLAIN]http://twentyonwards.blogs.com/.a/6a00d834522e1369e2011570521c98970c-800wi[/SIZE][/QUOTE]

:rofl::rofl::rofl:
 
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  • #81
DevilsAvocado said:
FJODOR MELANCHOLIC??

Nah, that doesn’t work... if you are going for a Russian, you might as well get a real Neanderthal:

NIKOLAI VALUEV!
a+nephillumvaluev.jpg

2.13 m (7 ft 0 in)

But that doesn’t work either. Technoviking will dance him to death.

... when he’s done with the Chinese army ...

Whoa... that's... whoa."Summa pia gratia nostra conservando corpora et custodita, de gente fera Normannica nos libera, quae nostra vastat, Deus, regna."(St. Vaast or St. Medard)
:wink:

Oh... and those poor lions!... still, that guy looks... yeah... pretty damned tough. Great hair too... I mean, really, that's an amazing head of hair!
 
  • #82
DevilsAvocado said:
FJODOR MELANCHOLIC??

Nah, that doesn’t work... if you are going for a Russian, you might as well get a real Neanderthal:

NIKOLAI VALUEV!
a+nephillumvaluev.jpg

2.13 m (7 ft 0 in)

But that doesn’t work either. Technoviking will dance him to death.

... when he’s done with the Chinese army ...

My GOD!:eek: what the hell the Russians feed this guy i mean he doesn't even look real but he is no match for this guy

http://www.thehotspotonline.com/moviespot/bolly/reviews/m/maula5.jpg

Watch him and his girlfriend in action they are total BADASS!

 
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  • #83
That's it no more responses i think every body is terrified by his magnificent TOKA!
 
  • #84
Dude... that is a CLEAVER on a stick... I think I have to start watching some Pakistani action movies.

Oh, and my guess with that Russian fellow is that they feed him bricks, iron, and small children! Seriously though, that looks like he's been a bare-knuckled fighter; his face is covered in bone-callouses.
 
  • #85
nismaratwork said:
Dude... that is a CLEAVER on a stick... I think I have to start watching some Pakistani action movies.

Oh, and my guess with that Russian fellow is that they feed him bricks, iron, and small children! Seriously though, that looks like he's been a bare-knuckled fighter; his face is covered in bone-callouses.

He is actually a pro boxer by the way but i think FEDOR EMELIANENKO will kill this guy in a fight.

By the way you if you want to see some Pakistani movies check out this video

 
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  • #86
FizixFreak said:
He is actually a pro boxer by the way but i think FEDOR EMELIANENKO will kill this guy in a fight.

By the way you if you want to see some Pakistani movies check out this video


Ooooh, thanks!
 
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  • #87
I love the "head-butt" camera angle... that looks PAINFUL. I'm reminded of something like a USA western, a Japanese samurai movie, and a Hong Kong action movie.

By the way, it must be miserably hot in that black leather, no?!
 
  • #88
nismaratwork said:
I love the "head-butt" camera angle... that looks PAINFUL. I'm reminded of something like a USA western, a Japanese samurai movie, and a Hong Kong action movie.

By the way, it must be miserably hot in that black leather, no?!

What are you talking about? "MAULAJUT" doesn't wear leather he kills wolves and bears and wear their skin(but he paints it black so it looks like leather).

His wondrous cleaver can stop bullets from a 50 caliber rifle.
 
  • #89
FizixFreak said:
What are you talking about? "MAULAJUT" doesn't wear leather he kills wolves and bears and wear their skin(but he paints it black so it looks like leather).

His wondrous cleaver can stop bullets from a 50 caliber rifle.

That guy needs to be in a new James Bond movie... hero or villain, he'd be great.


Oh.. and... wow... he's wearing wolf/bear hides? Damn.
 
  • #90
nismaratwork said:
That guy needs to be in a new James Bond movie... hero or villain, he'd be great.


Oh.. and... wow... he's wearing wolf/bear hides? Damn.

Too bad that cannot happen the actor SULTAN RAHI has died about some 15-18 years:frown: but the character MAULAJUT lives on as a comic character which at that time was considered a action hero i can't believe my dad still likes this stuff:biggrin:
 
  • #91
FizixFreak said:
Too bad that cannot happen the actor SULTAN RAHI has died about some 15-18 years:frown: but the character MAULAJUT lives on as a comic character which at that time was considered a action hero i can't believe my dad still likes this stuff:biggrin:

Heh... you love what you grew up with, you know what I mean?

Still, sorry about Sultan Rahi... I hope he died well. Bruce Lee, Sultan Rahi... these people need to live longer!
 
  • #92
nismaratwork said:
Heh... you love what you grew up with, you know what I mean?

Still, sorry about Sultan Rahi... I hope he died well. Bruce Lee, Sultan Rahi... these people need to live longer!

Yeah i guess you are right when my dad is watching these type of movies i bearly controll my laughter.

sultan rahi unfortunately died at the hands of robbers he was shot three times sad but true!
Sultan rahi as the bruce lee of Pakistan i never saw it from this angle and the other guy that you see in the picture is still alive and he is also a badass

[PLAIN]http://a.imageshack.us/img717/1281/noorietshirtcopy.jpg

Sohneya is the equivalent of DUDE in English
 
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  • #93
nismaratwork said:
Oh, and my guess with that Russian fellow is that they feed him bricks, iron, and small children!

Yup, definitely some sort of metal! :biggrin:

nismaratwork said:
Seriously though, that looks like he's been a bare-knuckled fighter; his face is covered in bone-callouses.

Nah, he’s a boxer... but he employs the Neanderthal shaving style...

[PLAIN]http://www.hayemaker.com/jscripts/tiny_mce/plugins/imagemanager/files/nikolai_valuev2.jpg

:biggrin:
 
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  • #94
FizixFreak said:
FEDOR EMELIANENKO will kill this guy in a fight.

Agree, if they cut of the legs on VALUEV: 7 ft vs 6 ft doesn’t seem like a fair fight! :biggrin:
 
  • #95
[PLAIN]http://a.imageshack.us/img717/1281/noorietshirtcopy.jpg

THAT’S PETER SELLERS!
 
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  • #96
DevilsAvocado said:
Yup, definitely some sort of metal! :biggrin:



Nah, he’s a boxer... but he employs the Neanderthal shaving style...

[PLAIN]http://www.hayemaker.com/jscripts/tiny_mce/plugins/imagemanager/files/nikolai_valuev2.jpg

:biggrin:

Holy... Oh my...


That's an axe. He's... Wow... that's terrifying.

@FizixFreak: Damn... shot by robbers?! I read that he was in over 750 films, and a Punjabi hero! I'm sorry about that, but for your father... I think we're all supposed to laugh at the entertainment of our fathers... until we become like them! :wink:

Sohneya... I like that.
 
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  • #97
Heil THIS TechnoViking fans! Chuck Norris would kick the Deutsch Haarschmuck off TechnoViking's face with the TechnoViking's own sissy marscherar dans stovlar, which he would then donate to the nearest needy techno dance ensemble.
Thank you Chuck Norris. Be good to us, be kind to us.
 
  • #98
ThomasT said:
Heil THIS TechnoViking fans! Chuck Norris would kick the Deutsch Haarschmuck off TechnoViking's face with the TechnoViking's own sissy marscherar dans stovlar, which he would then donate to the nearest needy techno dance ensemble.
Thank you Chuck Norris. Be good to us, be kind to us.

I'll buy that... but um... how about Russian Axe-face guy? He looks like not much fazes him... like the suffering of others. :bugeye:
 
  • #99
nismaratwork said:
I'll buy that... but um... how about Russian Axe-face guy? He looks like not much fazes him... like the suffering of others. :bugeye:

Russian guy is good only two losses in his entire career a former champion BUT fedor can still beat him why check this out this is for those inferior humans who don't know what fedor is capable of



Nismar i guess you are right one day we will be old and our kids will probably laugh at our entertainment..., this one day i was passing by my neighborhood a and kid calls me "UNCLE" i looked back at the kid like "really" when i was a kid i use to wait for the time to grow up now that i have i don't even realize it:biggrin:
 
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  • #100
FizixFreak said:
Russian guy is good only two losses in his entire career a former champion BUT fedor can still beat him why check this out this is for those inferior humans who don't know what fedor is capable of


Okay, he’s good on wrestling... but in that case I throw in ALEKSANDR KARELIN! The Missionary trick won’t work on him!

aleksandr-karelin_15136459.gif




:biggrin:
 

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  • #101
ThomasT said:
Heil THIS TechnoViking fans! Chuck Norris would kick the Deutsch Haarschmuck off TechnoViking's face with the TechnoViking's own sissy marscherar dans stovlar,

JaJa das sexy Techno Sturmbannführer tanzen mit sissy stovlar på on das straße GUT JA auspuff!

:biggrin:
 
  • #102
DevilsAvocado said:
Okay, he’s good on wrestling... but in that case I throw in ALEKSANDR KARELIN! The Missionary trick won’t work on him!

aleksandr-karelin_15136459.gif




:biggrin:


I actually know about that guy no doubt he is a MONSTER!

But still fedor has more than just grappling skills to offer his striking is also AMAZING he out striked MIRKO CROCOP the most feared striker of that time(if you watch MMA you would know) and by the way his fight against the Korean guy was just a glimpse of his career you need to watch this



FEDOR ALL THE WAY BABY!

[PLAIN]http://img713.imageshack.us/img713/889/la65a4196f2e306d5efe85eib.jpg[/SIZE]
 
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  • #103
FizixFreak said:
I actually know about that guy no doubt he is a MONSTER!

Yup! :biggrin:

FizixFreak said:
(if you watch MMA you would know)

Sorry, too gay for my taste...

700px-Mma_ground_fighting.jpg


:rofl:
 
  • #104
DevilsAvocado said:
Yup! :biggrin:



Sorry, too gay for my taste...

700px-Mma_ground_fighting.jpg


:rofl:

MMA is gay and wrestling is not??

[URL]http://www.jokesunlimited.com/jokepics/1269.jpg[/URL]

:rofl:

[PLAIN]http://stuff.pyzam.com/funnypics/f/slowdan.jpg

:rofl:
 
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  • #105
:rofl::rofl::rofl:

wrestlingcamp.jpg



:rofl::rofl::rofl:
 

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