What is the True Nature of Love?

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In summary, the conversation discusses the concept of love and its existence in the universe. Some believe it is a chemical reaction in the brain, while others see it as a spiritual connection between souls. However, love is ultimately defined as an evolutionary trait that facilitates reproductive success and can also be found in animals. The discussion also touches on the idea of love being a social behavior and the impact of conscious actions on promoting love. Others share personal experiences with love and its meaning, but ultimately the conversation highlights the complexity and subjectivity of love and its existence in the universe.
  • #1
michelle s
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Do you believe in love?

sometimes i wonder...

is it just a chemical reaction in the brain?

hormones creating certain feelings by sending singnals to certain points of your brain?

i am not quite sure how this works.

It would be helpful if someone could try to explain.. :redface:

but is there a spiritual level. a joining of two souls... soulmates?
 
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  • #2
For all things in the universe I separate into the subjective and the objective worlds.
Since our unabridged perception of the world is so drastically different from how it actually works, we can' trust our brain and senses to tell the truth. But that's quite ok, imagine how boring the world would be if we were just robots taking in the science of things.

Love is a subjective emotion, take for example anger, you have experienced anger and agree that it exists on the subjective level right?
Same with love, in science it's not "love", it's a complex machinery of domino pieces, but all those pieces together are experienced as we experience love, subjectively.

So yeah, I believe in love, I know that it's nothing more than the sum of its physical parts and reactions, but it still exists to us.
 
  • #3
Absolute - ly! Unfortunately, it is much easier to see the effects of hate. Love is the opposite side of that emotional coin.

i suspect that love is the glue that binds us together within the universe. love - hate motivates our actions. wouldn't it be great if we knew how to stimulate the love more readily than hate.

love&peace,
olde drunk
 
  • #4
olde drunk, your view on the universe is quite intriguing.

you seem to be pretty spiritual, but the big question is, do you feel the spiritual world also has effects on physical world? that these two are intrisically bound together?
 
  • #5
I think for love and hate to exist they must have fundamentals in the universe. Even if they are perceptions of conscious behaviour, communication. They're both actions that cause extremely different reactions to one another, not to mention feelings. I think it is a form of communication, a social behaviour, though all sciences lead to another...and that there is no reason for such feelings to occur and to exist without cause.

Love is unique that in it a conscious entity feels the desire for companionship (in their own life-time), an immortality (of children decents), of fair and open communication, etc
 
  • #6
In response to olde drunk's post: I believe we would stimulate love more if we all encourage each other to be conscious, concerned about the future and encourage ourselves to love and care the persons around us. Yes, even our enemies. :)
 
  • #7
michelle s said:
but is there a spiritual level. a joining of two souls... soulmates?

i don't believe there is...at one point in my life i did, but now i realize that real love does require an effort to a point...the magical feeling of being in love are definitely chemicals in the brain IMO. love that has and effort behind it-compromising, support, sacrifice, etc-tends to have a stronger bond over time. the whole soulmates theory is more wishful thinking because it seems so ideal. after spending time with a certain person and experiencing growth and understanding with them, then you realize how love grows.
 
  • #8
Love: an evolutionary selected trait that facilitates reproductive success. Love, or more scientifically called, "emotional attachment," is found in animals as well, such as a mother animal having an emotional attachment to her offspring.

Emotional attachment, just like all other human behaviors, are programmed into the brain, the blueprint being in the genes, and the physical manifestation being in the interaction between patterns of synapses and chemicals. Human brains are in fact computers, just more advanced ones, but not for long as computer technology keeps on improving.
 
  • #9
words from an old deep purple song...love don't mean a thing if she aint got nooooo gosh money. :rofl:

I think love means different things at different times in our lives..I have been in love a couple times.. it was hot & intense in every case. we both swore it would last forever. I was young'er. now love is when my granddaughter comes running down the hall way, jumps into my arm's ,gives me a bear hug and says, I missed you granddaddy and I love you...I know she does :smile:
 
  • #10
United States said:
Love: an evolutionary selected trait that facilitates reproductive success. Love, or more scientifically called, "emotional attachment," is found in animals as well, such as a mother animal having an emotional attachment to her offspring.

Emotional attachment, just like all other human behaviors, are programmed into the brain, the blueprint being in the genes, and the physical manifestation being in the interaction between patterns of synapses and chemicals. Human brains are in fact computers, just more advanced ones, but not for long as computer technology keeps on improving.

wow, with a mindset like that, i wish you luck in never being alone.
 
  • #11
merak said:
now love is when my granddaughter comes running down the hall way, jumps into my arm's ,gives me a bear hug and says, I missed you granddaddy and I love you...I know she does :smile:

children have a wonderful way of showing you things no matter what your age :smile:
 
  • #12
There are words you can use to express the meaning instead of just defining it.
 
  • #13
What might those words be?
 
  • #14
United States said:
Love: an evolutionary selected trait that facilitates reproductive success. Love, or more scientifically called, "emotional attachment," is found in animals as well, such as a mother animal having an emotional attachment to her offspring.

If love, no matter what it is, is found in humans, why should we be surprised that it is also found in animals?

Emotional attachment, just like all other human behaviors, are programmed into the brain, the blueprint being in the genes, and the physical manifestation being in the interaction between patterns of synapses and chemicals.

So is science, one could argue. But if that were true, then the whole truth about the universe, like love, can be found in our genes. I find that notion a bit preposterous.
 
  • #15
Kerrie said:
wow, with a mindset like that, i wish you luck in never being alone.

I gave a scientific explanation of Emotional Attachment. But if you prefer a blue collar response, here you go:

Love is a warm fuzzy feeling inside that makes me high as a kite and connects the Souls of all humans and thus gives us spiritual purpose and meaning blah blah blah.
 
  • #16
Egmont said:
So is science, one could argue. But if that were true, then the whole truth about the universe, like love, can be found in our genes. I find that notion a bit preposterous.

Yes, the ability for a human brain to think scientifically is the result of the actual biology of brain.

Truth of the universe found in our genes? I am discussing human emotions, such as emotional attachment. The biological makeup of our brains enable us to think, to feel hunger, thirst, sexual drive, etc. Basic emotions like thirst, hunger, sexual drive, and fear are programmed in the medulla of the brain, as well as in other animals and the medulla is what we humans have in common with lower animals. The especially unique thing about humans is that we have a much bigger cerebral cortex allowing for behavior associated with a much higher IQ.

If our emotion are not the result of programms in our brains, then the only other answer is that some outside force is controlling are brains, such as supernatural force, and I am not inclined to entertain such ideas in the context of science. I am not saying that supernatural things don't exist, but rather that they should have no place in science.
 
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  • #17
Regardess of what love is, we all seem to be in agreement that it is. When we use the word, we are referring to something that does exist. Does that answer the author's question?
 
  • #18
United States said:
Truth of the universe found in our genes?

I did say the notion is preposterous, but it's what your line of reasoning eventually leads to.

Look at it this way: most people think they love their mother because of something about the mother herself - what she is, what she does, what she feels for them, and so on. But you are saying what causes people to love their mothers is not the mother herself, but some "program" in the brain. That is, the truth about love between mother and child is to be find in their brains, and eventually their genes, rather than anything resembling personal relationships. That is your argument.

All I'm saying is, if that is the case, then the same must be true about the relationship between ourselves and the cosmos. That is, everything we believe about the cosmos is what our genes want us to believe.

I am not saying that supernatural things don't exist, but rather that they should have no place in science.

Well, if love is supernatural, then your scientific explanation of it is bonk, isn't it? It may be scientifically correct but it would not be true, and in that case why should anyone bother?
 
  • #19
Egmont said:
But you are saying what causes people to love their mothers is not the mother herself, but some "program" in the brain.

Exactly. Have you ever seen the inside of the brain? It's billions of neurons with trillions of synapses, all emerged in a liquid that carries hormones and other chemicals that interact with the synapses. Going through the axons and dentrites are ionic charges made of sodium and potassium. So basically, the brain is an organic computer. So tell me, how can Emotional Attachment lie outside of this biological substrate?
 
  • #20
United States said:
I gave a scientific explanation of Emotional Attachment. But if you prefer a blue collar response, here you go:

Love is a warm fuzzy feeling inside that makes me high as a kite and connects the Souls of all humans and thus gives us spiritual purpose and meaning blah blah blah.


the blue collar response must be from your own experience then? it certainly doesn't make me feel that way, but love is necessary to an extent for our species to continue on. also, some of us see love as rewarding, but as i said before, it takes work, just like most rewards...
 
  • #21
Kerrie said:
but love is necessary to an extent for our species to continue on.

And I don't deny that. The fact that the emotion of love evolved means it must have been reproductively advantageous (do you believe in Darwinian evolution?) meaning that humans have needed love for their offspring to survive long enough to reproduce and so on.


also, some of us see love as rewarding

yes, there may be a psychological feed-back loop where people who are predisposed to love show that love and then are rewarded with feeling good, which then causes them to seek even stronger love for their offspring and family members which would ensure reproduction of the youth. But there must have been a balancing off effect as well, for too much love may have used up too much resources and was counter-adaptive.

Sorry if my analysis antagonizes you, but I believe in evolution so I look at all human behavior from an evolutionary perspective, see http://www.hbes.com/ :

"The Human Behavior and Evolution Society (HBES) is an interdisciplinary, international society of researchers, primarily from the social and biological sciences, who use modern evolutionary theory to help to discover human nature - including evolved emotional, cognitive and sexual adaptations."
 
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  • #22
United States said:
Sorry if my analysis antagonizes you, but I believe in evolution so I look at all human behavior from an evolutionary perspective

I think what some of us might find a little antagonistic (or pushy) is when theory is presented as fact. While evolution might explain the development of our physiology, the question is still very open about the origin of life and the development of consciousness.

One dubious tactic I've seen far too much here (in this physicalist haven) is when a debater reduces human qualities to their physiological traits so they can be made to fit one's favorite physicalist theory. Some deny there is any true subjectivity so they can try to make functionalist theory work (but can't), others "dismiss" vitalist ideas claiming they can explain life without it (but can't), you want to reduce love to emotion as though that covers the subject of love (but it doesn't), etc. (There might be an emotional aspect to love, but many don't believe emotion fully defines it. What about agape, for instance?)

Most of us are familiar with evolutionary theory, so you needn't feel anyone requires an education in that. Some people know it, and still feel it can't account for certain living and human aspects. If you want to change minds, it will have to be done with logical points people have not already heard.
 
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  • #23
michelle s said:
Do you believe in love?

sometimes i wonder...

is it just a chemical reaction in the brain?

hormones creating certain feelings by sending singnals to certain points of your brain?

i am not quite sure how this works.

It would be helpful if someone could try to explain.. :redface:

but is there a spiritual level. a joining of two souls... soulmates?

Do you believe food is tasty, or a means of sustenance ?

It is ultimately whatever you believe it to be. If you believe it to be a chemical reaction, then it will be nothing more than a biological function. If you believe it's something more, then you may find more joy in it. Since love is subjective, you only get out of it what you put into it.

To put it more plainly, it is both, and how you choose to view it determines it's true value.
 
  • #24
Les Sleeth said:
I think what some of us might find a little antagonistic (or pushy) is when theory is presented as fact.

There is more scientific evidence supporting a biological origin of human behavior than a supernatural origin.

While evolution might explain the development of our physiology, the question is still very open about the origin of life and the development of consciousness.

Actually, plenty of research is available in the field of psychometrics and behavioral genetics that explains much of human behavior.

One dubious tactic I've seen far too much here (in this physicalist haven) is when a debater reduces human qualities to their physiological traits so they can be made to fit one's favorite physicalist theory. Some deny there is any true subjectivity so they can try to make functionalist theory work (but can't), others "dismiss" vitalist ideas claiming they can explain life without it (but can't), you want to reduce love to emotion as though that covers the subject of love (but it doesn't), etc. (There might be an emotional aspect to love, but a lot of us don't believe emotion fully defines it. What about agape, for instance?)

Yes, pragmatists choose to have tangible and empirical explanations for everything, while others choose religious beliefs.

Most of us are familiar with evolutionary theory, so you needn't feel anyone requires an education in that.

Actually, most just have a rudimentary understanding of Evolutionary Psychology.
 
  • #25
I suppose you can view everything from a purely mechanical viewpoint, but this is a self-destructive viewpoint. To say that love is just a series of chemical reactions is pattenly absurd. It is not nature vs nurture, but nature and nurture. Some people are utterly incapable of loving, and this has been proven to be to their disadvantage and caused by a lack of nurturing.

Love is one of the more fuzzy and romanticized concepts ever devised. People use it for everything from an excuse to abuse each other, to commiting suicide and declaring war. The most taboo word in the chinese language means "divine love"; they say people should own up to what they do and leave some things sacred. Among Taoists like myself, love is not something we talk about much. The idea in part is that if we cultivate ourselves as virtuous people, all the rest will work itself out.

If you want to know if love is real or not, just live it. After all, it does not matter if it is real or not if you cannot experience love. To paraphrase R. W. Emerson, "Virtue is its own reward, to have friend you must first be a friend."
 
  • #26
Perhaps love is one of those things which the sum is greater than of its parts? It could just be an evolutionary or neurological response, but could it also be something greater?

Love seems to to be extremely irrational at times (it can be found in the strangest of places) or downright paradoxical. Take for example my parents: when they got divorced, the last act of love that my mom made was to sign the divorce papers from my dad. She loved him so much that she agreed to give up that love so that my dad would be happy.

In my opinion, it seems that the greatest sign of love occurs when a person in the relationship would love the other so much that they would give love up.
 
  • #27
wuliheron said:
I suppose you can view everything from a purely mechanical viewpoint, but this is a self-destructive viewpoint. To say that love is just a series of chemical reactions is pattenly absurd. It is not nature vs nurture, but nature and nurture. Some people are utterly incapable of loving, and this has been proven to be to their disadvantage and caused by a lack of nurturing.

i agree wuli...perhaps those of us who assert a nature vs nurture and forget we need one with the other have lacked nurture themselves...

The fact that the emotion of love evolved means it must have been reproductively advantageous (do you believe in Darwinian evolution?) meaning that humans have needed love for their offspring to survive long enough to reproduce and so on.

you asked if i believed in the darwinian evolution, thus you must be implying slightly that it is yet still a theory and not fact...just remember, only fools are sure of themselves :wink:
 
  • #28
United States said:
There is more scientific evidence supporting a biological origin of human behavior than a supernatural origin.

Why assume those are the only two choices?


United States said:
Actually, plenty of research is available in the field of psychometrics and behavioral genetics that explains much of human behavior.

Behavior does not explain consciousness, and genetics cannot account for all human behavior. If I am driving a car, are you going to attribute all its behavior to car mechanics? Yes, a great deal of the car's behavior is due to the mechanics of the car. But when I aim it towards Yosemite, all the reasons the car is heading in that direction cannot be explained by the car's mechanical systems. Similarly, physicalists study the human looking ONLY at physiology and then concludes ONLY physiology is running the physical system. Gee, I wonder why.


United States said:
Yes, pragmatists choose to have tangible and empirical explanations for everything, while others choose religious beliefs.

I see you want to reserve the label "pragmatist" for your opinions, but I am a pragmatist myself and it isn't limited to only what is approved by science (I assume that's what you mean by "empiricial" although all it really means is experieced-based investigation).

Again, why do you think the only choices are physicalist evolution and religion? You might consider broadening your reading list.

United States said:
Actually, most just have a rudimentary understanding of Evolutionary Psychology.

Well, you are at a science site, so the percentage is higher. In any case, I sure hope you don't start "educating" us.

But the subject was love, and you implied it is only emotion. Would you care to define emotion? I dispute it because of my own definition which is, human sensitivity enhanced by hormones. So I recognize there is a feeling which is hormone induced, and we label it "love." But I also know about another feeling which is not like that. This love is felt inside oneself alone, and doesn't require the love "object" to be any particular way (and in one of its aspects doesn't require the love object at all!). I've been married a long time, and I can confidently report that the non-emotional love is better, even for my marriage. It is stronger, comes without strings attached, and makes me happy without needing anything in return.

Now, has genetics produced that potential in me? I don't think so but you do. From my debating experiences here, I don't believe there is anything either of us can say to change the other's mind. That's why my answer to Michelle would be to dive into and enjoy love rather than trying to figure it out in advance. After experiencing it enough, then make up your own mind about it. And if I were to make a recommendation I'd say, watch out for emotional love, but to fearlessly give the strong, non-emotional kind of love a try.
 
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  • #29
First off I think we must divide true love / loving actions between people, and infatuation.
Love is something I believe in, but then it's something that correspond with something that's strictly speaking: getting better. And it's action, either 'to yourself' or others. But something that's not easily understood, something that's essential in all things you do. I consider that the more lively it is the more love it contains(or the better it is), eg. good actions between people. So only good action creates life, it creates something. If you invent something that seems really advanced to us, but it doesn't end up to good, then strictly speaking: it's not good for anything, it's not love, or it's useless. That's as simple as I manage to describe it or understand it now.
I think it's with love as with intelligence. We're not supposed to reach the bottom of it. It's endless so to speak. Maybe it's bound to feelings because feelings are the liveliest thing we know.

And that evolution only applies to physics doesn't make any sense to me either. Why shouldn't it also count for mental, loving, moral and systematic states too?
(tried to make it a little more clearer)
 
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  • #30
I'm having trouble interpeting the middle blah in your responce. But I'll take it as it is and try to understand.

Michelle S, I'd prefer not to share my words. It's quite more interesting to read others. But there are words to express and that is what I wanted to share and that is the obvious for I have great talents in observing the obvious.
 
  • #31
pace said:
And that evolution only applies to physics doesn't make any sense to me either. Why shouldn't it also count for mental, loving and systematic states too?

Well, it depends on what you mean by "evolution." My objection at least is attributing all human characteristics to having been "selected" by nature to help humans survive, and to therefore being the result of genetic programming. Some people use the term "evolution" not in a Darwinist sense, and simply to mean to develop, however that might be.

Michelle asked if love could be two souls joining. That is a common explanation, as you probably know. But to be true in some way doesn't necessarily imply supernaturalism. Consciousness, for instance, might not in essence be physical; possibly, as many have reported, there is some common basis we all share as consciousness. In that case, the term "love" might be a way we refer to how it feels when we experience that common, non-physical basis. So evolution could be applied in a non-physical way if we use it to mean the development of consciousness's ability to experience that sort of "oneness."
 
  • #32
There is always a core answer but that doesn't make the other answers wrong. Being born is just the beginning, you still have to grow up.
 
  • #33
I believe in a love defined as a relationship with shared emotion and epiphanic experiences, but do I believe in a love that lasts through time and tribulation?
 
  • #34
I don't know if you do.
 
  • #35
Yeah, I think you're into something interesting sleeth.

Les Sleeth said:
Some people use the term "evolution" not in a Darwinist sense, and simply to mean to develop, however that might be.

Yea, I develloped it in my previous post to more.
I guess then that people use the word love for three things. Either infatuation. Or as you say two souls(or beings) joining. Or the more general term as I meant in my first post: The underlying goodness in all things.

Les Sleeth said:
Well, it depends on what you mean by "evolution." My objection at least is attributing all human characteristics to having been "selected" by nature to help humans survive, and to therefore being the result of genetic programming.

And Yea. But emotions and love aren't just there for helping us to survive, but also for deriving great pleasure or love, for it's own sake. But to me it doesn't help if you have system if you don't have love(as I understands it in my previous post).
Generally there's too much litterature around me that defines Order as The Good thing. It's a tradition from many religions. Not that I want to blame religions here. Maybe focusing on systems in a certain period of time was the right thing to do. But I think it's alittle sad we live in days where we've too much forgotten the understanding of love as something that's good for everyone. An undermining of our understanding and life when we use it for something that's just between two persons.
 
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