Here I am asking for help again... I had an experience today that affirmed my doubts about being in graduate school. This morning I had an exam. With approximately one hour sleep (no I wasn't playing video games or cramming, I have a chronic insomnia problem which I have yet to find a solution) I showed up for class about 20 minutes late and took the exam and probably failed it. No, the material wasn't difficult, yes that 20 minutes would have proved invaluable in getting a decent grade because I wouldn't have had to rush, something much more serious happened: I didn't care. In undergrad I had so much enthusiasm and no matter how crappy I felt I always took my work seriously and had high hopes. I could always motivate myself out of a rut through enjoyment of my work and my love of the subject I am studying. Some professors had high hopes for me too, one in particular (whom I would also consider a friend) really stands out. I just started grad school this year at a new institution. I feel like the enthusiasm is being sucked out of me. I feel so unfullfilled and unhappy that I cannot motivate myself to do anything. I feel incredibly hopeless, like I am wasting my time. I have not worked out more than 2 times in these past two weeks (normally I try to get 2-3 days/week), I sincerely don't care about any of my work. I have no desire to talk to most of the students - quite frankly this place is much less competitive then my undergraduate school. Kids whine like children when they get an 85. At my old school and 85 was something to be proud of in most classes. Then again, I've never cared too much about grades. In my fluids class some of the kids ask the most stupid questions and it drives me nuts. For example, I recall an instance when a kid asked what gauge pressure was (no this kid was not from a foreign land). A graduate student asking about gauge pressure is pathetic, at least if you are in aerospace/mechanical engineering. I have also recently been seeing two doctors about some anxiety and depression (I guess that gives you some insight into how "special" I am). One of them thinks I may be bipolar II (personally I think I may have cyclothymic disorder), the other believe I just have severe anxiety and chronic depression. I have also just started taking a sleeping pill only to find that it makes me feel like absolute garbage the next day! So I either sleep 2 hours and have no energy or sleep 8 hours and feel like I had a frontal lumbotomy. Whatever the case I feel like I am losing control over my daily life. I don't feel like I can function at an adequate level to do well in grad school. I haven't found a project that I am truly enthusiastic about either. I feel like the more time I spend at this institution the more time and money I am wasting. I am not sure what I will do if I leave, but I am thinking about getting an entry level job for a year or 2 then going back to grad school once I get my life sorted out. At least if I had a job I would be able to save money so I wouldn't have to live like a beggar and maybe this would buy me time to develop a foundation before I pursue a more unstructured goal such as graduate school. I was also considering transferring to another program - in light of these recent events I do not think that would solve my problems. Another problem, which I think is indicative of bipolar, is that one minute I think ideas like the aforementioned are great then the next I think they are terrible. If anyone can provide me some insight please do because I am screwed and I have no idea what to do anymore.