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Facebook note gone awry

  1. Mar 6, 2008 #1
    Ok, I know I'm not the most sensitive person, but I'd like to think I'm not at the jerk end of the spectrum either. Today, however, I'm kind of unsure where I am. You see today, I received an email from my boyfriend (still a youngish relationship) saying that I ruined his day before it had even started. At first, I couldn't figure out what he was referring to... until I logged into my Facebook account and was notified that someone had responded to a note I had written last night. This note was inspired by a comment said bf had made about Michael Jackson's music. Seemed pretty ignorant of him to flat out say that it plain sucked. He later made the excuse that he didn't have respect for people that didn't write their own music. It just seemed he was being completely stubborn and snobbish, so I wrote a note:

    So was posting this note in the first place just awful? Because it gets worse...

    First response, from his brother no less!

    (edit, was sure if that last word was prohibited)

    Well yeah, that's where I was going with it, though I wouldn't have said it that way. So, all of this has ruined his day. I get that it was a jerky thing of me to do, but is he overreacting?
     
    Last edited: Mar 6, 2008
  2. jcsd
  3. Mar 6, 2008 #2
    Overreacting over something stupid. Get rid of em.
     
  4. Mar 6, 2008 #3

    JasonRox

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    I don't follow a thing you're trying to say.

    Did you say MJ sucks? Did you ruin his day by saying this?
    Did he say MJ sucks? Did you ruin his day by saying he's ignorant?

    PS. Limit the use of Facebook. If I'm seeing someone, I prohibit the relationship status bull****. I have no wall. I don't allow anyone to tag me in pictures. I don't write my fav. movies and garbage. It's only used to connect with people easier period.
     
  5. Mar 6, 2008 #4
    He said MJ sucks, I thought it was stupid comment, so I wrote a note about it (not naming him) and then his brother said whoever said it was a pr**k... kind of funny, but only to anyone not him.

    Facebook hasn't been a problem for me. What do I care if anyone knows what I think? Or that I'm in a relationship? And I don't ever talk crap about anyone on there (not that I'd be inclined to anyway).
     
    Last edited: Mar 6, 2008
  6. Mar 6, 2008 #5
    he's over-overreacting. lol.

    EDIT: do NOT show him this thread :rofl::rofl:
     
  7. Mar 6, 2008 #6

    Moonbear

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    Okay, this sounds like the sort of conversation 12 year olds have. "So and so said this guy in that band sucks, but I think he's so hot...she's so stupid to think he sucks, and now she's mad at me for telling her she's stupid, and we're so NEVER going to talk to each other again." :rolleyes:

    I take it that neither of you are 12, and hopefully haven't been for a long time (otherwise we have a different issue to be discussing here, and might be more related to the subject of Michael Jackson than I think).

    Why do you think he's upset? Is it because of something as petty as disagreeing over Michael Jackson, or is it because you took something so petty that should have been dropped and forgotten as soon as it happened and made a big deal of it by posting it for everyone else you know to discuss? Why would you make a public issue of such a petty argument? And call him ignorant for holding a different opinion from yourself?

    Quite frankly, if you're getting into such a heated argument over something so inconsequential to your relationship or lives as Michael Jackson (or any other celebrity), and calling one another ignorant over your opinions on this, and escalating these arguments into the public's eyes, then maybe you should consider if you're really suited for one another at all.
     
  8. Mar 6, 2008 #7
    He's often stubborn and snobbish about stuff, and this time it bugged me enough to do something. Something stupid, but not that big of a deal in my eyes. It's not like all of my friends are posting responses and insulting the comment, it was just one comment by his brother. If it were me, I'd find the humor in it (and at the least not feel upset about it).
     
  9. Mar 6, 2008 #8

    Moonbear

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    What I'm detecting here is a problem that goes deeper than the original question. If you think your boyfriend is stubborn and snobbish...to the point it really bugs you (i.e., you're not looking at this and thinking it's a cute trait), and your approach to handling it isn't a big deal to you, but is a big deal to him, it really just sounds like you have incompatibility issues. Someone more compatible with you would have found it funny, someone more compatible with him wouldn't have thought the comment was snobbish or ignorant.

    I'm just not sure it's clear if this is an overreaction by him or insensitivity by you, or more simply that you have different ways of interacting/reading into things. If it were a completely isolated incident, I'd be inclined to chalk it up to a bad day and growing pains in your relationship, and if it all blows over by the end of the day when you can talk it over in person, then it still might be nothing more than that. But, if you often feel his snobbish, and this was a reaction to that, unless this gets an open discussion going about that feeling, it doesn't bode well. To view a boyfriend as stubborn isn't necessarily a bad thing, but viewing him as snobbish is. It doesn't really sound like you like him all that much.
     
  10. Mar 6, 2008 #9
    Usually I don't mind that much. It's definitely a fluke that I did this. I just feel that I have to tiptoe around his feelings a lot, and this time my natural impulse to say whatever I feel/think got the better of me (Sagittarius issues!). But really, it usually doesn't bug me that much. I think part of it was that he holds a self-image that chalks up such snobbery to good taste and knowledge, and I wanted to bring him down to earth.
     
    Last edited: Mar 6, 2008
  11. Mar 6, 2008 #10

    wolram

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    Sagittarius problems? well that's me and i do not tip toe around any thing, all ways say what you think and sod the other persons feelings, unless she is you mom, snobs make me puke, one time i decked one, and he made my life a misery with legal threats, that is until a chance (meeting) some time later, when he shot me in the head with a pellet gun, i had witnesses
    so i kick this creep every time i see him.
     
    Last edited: Mar 6, 2008
  12. Mar 6, 2008 #11
    But then there's the whole issue of spousal abuse and being taken to jail... I don't think he'd wait for me on the other side after that.

    Funny thing is, he's a Sag too, with his Mercury and Venus in Sag, Mars in Capriocrn, Jupiter and Saturn in Scorpio... all formidable, masculine signs. But then he's got his Moon in Cancer, which just trumps everything else and makes him ultra-sensitive. Also makes him very creative and funny, but easily hurt.
     
  13. Mar 6, 2008 #12

    wolram

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    What the hell? you are so nuts, punch him in the face and go and look for some Earth like person.
     
  14. Mar 6, 2008 #13

    lisab

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    Sagittarius issues? Rubbish. What was happening in the visible universe on the day you were born is relevant to absolutely nothing that's happening with your life today.

    If you're impulsive, just admit that you're impulsive. If you're OK with being impulsive, then fine; otherwise, change it. Don't blame Jupiter.

    Sounds like you two have some issues you need to sort out -- just do it face-to-face. When you converse online you miss things like facial expressions and body language.
     
  15. Mar 6, 2008 #14
    Just because I believe in astrology doesn't mean I don't take responsibility for the way I am. Rather, astrology goes deeper into explaining why you are the way you are. It's not about blame, it's about understanding. So far, the explanations seem to fit me and everyone else I know. Btw, the planets are said to reflect what's inside you already, not cause you to be a certain way.

    E.G. Someone with their Moon in Cancer might be aware that they're super emotional, but not get why.

    Here would be an astrological explanation/analysis:

    If you think that's a rubbish answer, you aren't obliged to accept it. I, however, find that this does apply to those with their Moon in Cancer.

    vs. people who are super emotional and have their Moon in Pisces:

    Therefore these two placements result in similar expressions for different reasons.

    (I have a feeling I'll need to edit this thread to say that it's gone awry as well)
     
    Last edited: Mar 6, 2008
  16. Mar 6, 2008 #15

    wolram

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    Enough said, go find your inner self, and good luck.
     
  17. Mar 6, 2008 #16
    I just got a freaking street sweeping ticket because I've been talking with him all morning through email about this. He's paying for half of it.:grumpy:
     
  18. Mar 6, 2008 #17

    wolram

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    I wish i could understand you, you sound like a real nutter, just tell us you imagined problem
    and may be we can give you an imagined solution
     
  19. Mar 6, 2008 #18
    ditto, what are you saying?
     
  20. Mar 6, 2008 #19
    Well we all go through overly anal phases, and star signs are likely to be as revealing as the size of my foot in comparison to my mouth. No offence.

    Lighten up, it's Michael Jackson. The guys wierd and certainly not subject to the usual laws of human beings, ok it's unfair to say he doesn't write his music, because he clearly has had an input. But at the end of the day who cares, and like Moonbear says, are you sure this isn't an issue far more to do with you and your bf, than anything real? Have a discussion, talk about the whole thing, don't get bent out of shape about irrelevant issues, and if you do make sure you talk about it, without using that over imaginative capacity we all have to make mountains out of molehills.

    To coin a phrase, everyone is an idiot for ~15% of their life. You just hope that when you are the other person isn't also in the idiot phase.
     
    Last edited: Mar 6, 2008
  21. Mar 6, 2008 #20

    BobG

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    His brother's response is just plain ignorant.

    First of all, I doubt everyone has heard Michael Jackson's music. There has to be some primitive aboriginal tribes that don't have radios, let alone ipods.

    Second of all, Michael Jackson sucks! (Edit: If you don't believe me, do a poll.)

    The solution is obvious. Both of you should quit associating with his brother and get over it.
     
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