Feeling Like an Outsider: Overcoming Unwarranted Reactions

  • Thread starter haxtor21
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In summary: You sound like you have a lot of self-confidence, just like alot of people who don't get talked to often. I think you should just keep being yourself and not worry about what other people think.
  • #1
haxtor21
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So today i go to work lifeguarding... i step out of the punch in office and this fellow guard took the corner towards the punch in office while i was turning the corner to leave; we both had enough space and were not in front of each other. She slightly jumped when she saw me, said sorry, and put her hand on her mouth while smiling (typical girl moevement). I was about to say why are you sorry... but I just kept walking and remained speechless for some reason.

Now I don't consider myself a photomodel by any means, but i don't know why this keeps happening to me when i encounter people like this. For one thing I know that my head is big, and i have a slight amblyopia in my right eye that is not so noticeable.

For some reason I always appear scary to people. Maybe because I tend to not talk alot, thus they don't know how to react to me, even further automatically classifying me as creepy because i don't talk as much as others/express my opinions/avoid confrontation. I am also slightly built but chubby at the same time, about 6 foot two tall.


Do i need to start bodybuilding so I look more proportional/attractive ? Or is this just some underlying personality problem that i keep pushing away?

I want to stop being treated like an outsider. I can see people react differently when they talk to me, but after we talk for a while the conversation starts to flow and everything seems normal.

It could also be my post-nasal drip, making my voice sound like I am mumbling(unclear).

//rant over.
 
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  • #2
haxtor21 said:
So today i go to work lifeguarding... i step out of the punch in office and this fellow guard took the corner towards the punch in office while i was turning the corner to leave; we both had enough space and were not in front of each other. She slightly jumped when she saw me, said sorry, and put her hand on her mouth while smiling (typical girl moevement). I was about to say why are you sorry... but I just kept walking and remained speechless for some reason...

Don't be self-conscious. Just try to be more talkative. Be light. Be self-effacing (just not to the point of seeming unkind to yourself).
 
  • #3
You just described me. I also have a slight big head, lazy eye, however, many people have asked whether I modeled or was thinking of modeling. I have been in several of those situations as well.

I do workout a lot now which only aids me in feeling better throughout the day. When I feel good, I tend to be more playful, witty, and talkative, if not, then I am more relaxed, less talkative, and more regular I guess.

I would say try and talk a bit more as you are more than likely not ugly. The downside to that is, in my case, making too many friends, and a few too many women will start to hit on you once they know you aren't mean.
 
  • #4
FrancisZ said:
Don't be self-conscious. Just try to be more talkative. Be light. Be self-effacing (just not to the point of seeming unkind to yourself).


Hey Fran. Long time. How's life?
 
  • #5
haxtor21 said:
So today i go to work lifeguarding... i step out of the punch in office and this fellow guard took the corner towards the punch in office while i was turning the corner to leave; we both had enough space and were not in front of each other. She slightly jumped when she saw me, said sorry, and put her hand on her mouth while smiling (typical girl moevement). I was about to say why are you sorry... but I just kept walking and remained speechless for some reason.

Now I don't consider myself a photomodel by any means, but i don't know why this keeps happening to me when i encounter people like this. For one thing I know that my head is big, and i have a slight amblyopia in my right eye that is not so noticeable.

For some reason I always appear scary to people. Maybe because I tend to not talk alot, thus they don't know how to react to me, even further automatically classifying me as creepy because i don't talk as much as others/express my opinions/avoid confrontation. Im also slightly built but chubby at the same time, about 6 foot two tall.


Do i need to start bodybuilding so I look more proportional/attractive ? Or is this just some underlying personality problem that i keep pushing away?

Nice stats. And I think you're being a little silly. Usually being quiet gets one respect 'cause your not the loud mouth/center of the convo especially useless and nonsense convo. Because you're quiet and don't talk much, you're not like the guy whose mouth is always running so people can go and confront him easily. You're quiet so you get a lot of respect. It's like when something happens and everyone's running to go check it out and you're just sitting there uninterested. Or when everyone's into a convo/debate and you're just sitting there by yourself not really caring. It makes you come of as "different" so obviously you'll be treated as different. It's not your physical appearance that makes you different so don't think you're scaring people away. It's the fact that you're quiet. It's made you gain a deal of respect to a point where not everyone can just walk up to you and talk. They respect you to that point. You're better off than the guy who's always at the center of the convo and making jokes. People laugh at his jokes but at the end of the day the respect's not there. Anyone will say anything to him whereas it's not the case with you.

Btw, you should body build. Whether it helps or not. You got a nice height body building would be great on you. P.s. just speak up and be vocal.
 
  • #6
Don't worry, you're probably not an alien.
 
  • #7
Alienjoey said:
Don't worry, you're probably not an alien.

yeah. If anything YOU would know if he was an alien or not:smile:
 
  • #8
dude don't worry! people look weird at each other all the time! that girl was probably not expecting to see anyone and turned the corner, saw someone and was spooked! Happens to me all the time! I always get freaked out when I see a person when I'm not expecting to see anyone! nevermind jump, I even scream from the shock sometimes! Nothing to do with the person at all!
yeah who cares what anyone else thinks! everyone is considered weird to someone! I get weird looks all the time! If I'm in a good mood I ignore it/smile at them, if not then I think that person has something wrong with them/is in a bad mood and swear at them in my head...
 

FAQ: Feeling Like an Outsider: Overcoming Unwarranted Reactions

What does it mean to feel like an outsider?

Feeling like an outsider refers to the experience of not fitting in or belonging to a particular group or community, often resulting in feelings of isolation, loneliness, and disconnection.

What are some possible reasons for feeling like an outsider?

There can be many reasons for feeling like an outsider, including being part of a minority group, having a different background or culture, experiencing social anxiety, or having a mental health condition.

How can one overcome feeling like an outsider?

One way to overcome feeling like an outsider is to seek support from understanding and inclusive individuals or groups. It can also be helpful to focus on your own strengths and interests, and to practice self-compassion and self-acceptance.

What are some negative consequences of feeling like an outsider?

Feeling like an outsider can lead to negative consequences such as low self-esteem, social withdrawal, and mental health issues like depression and anxiety. It can also impact one's sense of belonging and overall well-being.

Is feeling like an outsider always a bad thing?

Not necessarily. Feeling like an outsider can also be a result of being unique and having different perspectives and experiences. It can lead to personal growth and resilience, as well as the opportunity to connect with others who share similar experiences.

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