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First date advice

  1. Jan 8, 2015 #1
    On the first date should I offer to pick her up or have her meet me some where, which is better.
    should I go for a kiss on the first date or just feel it out. How should I end the date.
  2. jcsd
  3. Jan 8, 2015 #2
    Meet her somewhere. Don't kiss unless you are feeling very good vibes. First date should be fun and friendly.
  4. Jan 9, 2015 #3
    Fun is good. Memorable is good. After going out with a lady for awhile, I took her for a picnic lunch in a park. It was the first time any man had done that.

    Kisses are an instinctive thing. You're usually in a quiet place later in the date. She looks at you and there's a feeling that time is passing oddly. That's how I describe it anyway, LOL.
  5. Jan 9, 2015 #4
    "I enjoy myself a lot today. Thank you Minie for having spent some time out with me. May I kiss you ? I really like to kiss you."
    Something like that, if she agrees for a kiss, make it dry (wet is for the lips), so kiss her forehead, because this is the first date. Then you can say "good bye" and don't forget to leave some causes open for another meeting in a very very near future i.e tomorrow.
    Uh oh, chew some good smelly gums to make your breath better, never leave your first kiss a memorable bad experience because of mouth germs.
  6. Jan 9, 2015 #5
    thanks for all the responses
    @Silicon Waffle: leave some causes open for another meeting, do you mean like a reason to meet up again?
  7. Jan 9, 2015 #6
    I think meeting somewhere is better if you don't know each other already, pick her up if you already know each other. I also think picking her up is more for young people when not everyone has a car (I don't know how old you are). Don't be more than a few minutes late (it makes you look disrespectful) or more than 10 minutes early (it would make you look desperate).

    I wouldn't go for a kiss unless it's clear she wants it...and you'd better not be "feeling out" anything until at least date 3 or 4, otherwise you're liable to get slapped, and if she actually is down with that on the first date then she's too easy, and you don't know where someone like that has been.

    End it with something like "I had a good time, we should do this again." Ask her if it's okay to kiss or hug her- it's dorky, but IME a lot of girls think that's cute. Don't stress out if she says no. Don't say anything like "I have to go now" that would make it sound like you're excusing yourself. DO NOT under any circumstances allow her to pay, as this will be an effective forfeiture of your manhood (just kidding, it's the 21st century. Offer just to be polite, and don't read too much into it if she wants to pay for half or pay separately.)
  8. Jan 9, 2015 #7
    ok thanks, she says she studies optics in her spare time, would it be weird if I brought a benham top to show her, the one that is made of black and white stripes, and when you spin it, you see colors.
  9. Jan 9, 2015 #8
    I would say no, unless you're also knowledgeable about optics. It might make you look like you're trying to show off. But do ask her about that.
  10. Jan 9, 2015 #9


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    Depends on whether the two of you already know each other well or if you barely know each other.

    If you're both adults, meeting somewhere is safer. Either one of you can leave with no complications. That's probably not a huge factor if you already know each other before going on a first date.

    If the two of you are younger and she's still living at home, you'll probably be expected to pick her up just so her parents can get a look at the guy that's taking their daughter out on a date.

    Whether you kiss her or not and how to end the date depends on how it went. I wouldn't expect much from a first date - especially if the two of you don't know each other well. You try to keep options for future dates open because it will usually take more than one date to decide if you like each other.

    Obviously, there can be exceptions. If the two of you have had a crush on each other for months and you're just now getting up the nerve to go on a date, you should probably give her a kiss. Or maybe you're dating someone you don't know and she turns out to be a cat-loving psycho, in which case excusing yourself to use the restroom and crawling out the restroom window might be an effective way to end the date.
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