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Friends relationships

  1. Nov 28, 2009 #1
    If long time friends get into a short term relationship and then break up. The girl finds a new boyfriend but trusts his ex more to discuss personal things including ones related to her relationship with current boyfriend (usual things where girls cry as they talk). Is the girl immature or guy an idiot?
  2. jcsd
  3. Nov 28, 2009 #2


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    I don't see the problem with talking with a friend about personal things. Sounds like a good friendship to me. That's normal.

    And it's also still normal she trusts that friend, who is now an ex, more than her boyfriend. She knew that friend for a long time and trusted that friend before and still does. Sounds normal. Since her boyfriend is new, a high level of trust hasn't developped yet, that's normal.

    Hence, moral of the story. She's acting normal and the guy sounds like an insecure little *****.
  4. Nov 28, 2009 #3
    Or perhaps she is playing both of them :P
  5. Nov 28, 2009 #4


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    Yah I don't see what's wrong with this either.

    I don't get why the guy is insecure though?
  6. Nov 28, 2009 #5


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    Nothing wrong with it, as long as you're not "trying to win her over again and ignoring other girls".
  7. Nov 28, 2009 #6


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    There's no way to generalize this to a unilateral answer. It's conditional on the circumstance.

    The first thing I'd check on though, is the agenda of either party. Is it possible that, as DanP says, she's playing the ex? Some girls like to hang on to guys. Is it possible he's pretending to be a confidante in the hopes that he'll have an "in" when the right time comes along?
  8. Nov 29, 2009 #7


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    Why is she crying while talking about her current boyfriend? It sounds to me like things aren't going so well with the current boyfriend. Why is she discussing this with the ex boyfriend? Could be that she's seeking some form of reassurance from a male friend that it's not something she's doing wrong. Or, it could be that she's trying to let the ex know she's potentially available again if he's interested again. Or, yeah, she could be playing the ex (or even the current boyfriend). These are things you just have to figure out for yourself, unfortunately.
  9. Dec 1, 2009 #8
    Some health concerns (afraid that she might be pregnant). I do not want to know too many details about them but I agree that it is conditional on circumstances. I found that it is an interesting case where they still choose to maintain friendship. I am not sure how long it last ... when the boy looks like very insecure who would run to her at 2 AM in the morning if she calls ...
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