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Has anyone ever been stalked by a bully?

  1. Jun 2, 2014 #1
    By a bully- A person who wants to hurt someone then tries to figure out ways to cause problems for whoever it is that they hate, and then the harasser / bully writes false police reports?

    How did you overcome the problem ?
     
  2. jcsd
  3. Jun 2, 2014 #2
    Yes, I kicked his *** eventually and he left me alone. It was back in school, he didn't know me so he thought I'd be easy prey. I didn't react to his bullying in the beginning so he thought I was scared, then he tried to provoke me somewhere out of sight... and he got a broken nose.
     
  4. Jun 2, 2014 #3
    Bullies like to take the path of least resistance. If you make it really hard for them when they mess with you, then they'll probably find someone who isn't such a problem.
     
  5. Jun 2, 2014 #4

    Choppy

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    Solutions to bullying and stalking are circumstance- and individual specific. There is no one-size-fits-all solution.

    But here are some general tips that can help.

    The first thing you can do either as the person being bullied or as a bystander (even if you are afraid to intervene) is make a detailed record of every bully-victim interaction or uncomfortable situation. Note dates, times, direct quotes of what was said, circumstances, and even record your personal feelings. Time-stamped photographs can help too. This can be invaluable if the problem requires some kind of legal intervention down the road. It can also help you to identify patterns in behaviour, and develop plans for dealing with potential future interactions.

    Secondly, find people you trust and tell them about the problems. Even if they aren't in a position to do anything immediately, talking about being bullied can help you to normalize your feelings, solicit feedback (so you're not stuck wondering if something is all in your head), and may make it easier for you to get help when it's needed more immediately. If you are a young person especially - involve adults you trust.

    Third, come up with some strategies for avoiding the problem person or dealing with the bullying behaviour. This is of course where things become very situation-specific. Remember though, that not everyone has to be John Wayne. Sometimes this can be as simple as changing your routine, avoiding certain groups of people, or not visiting certain places. Sometimes it can be a lot more difficult. It's a lot harder to avoid a person who sits beside you in a chemistry class, for example (although you can request a different seating arrangement).

    Articulation is power. Learn the law where you are, as well as local anti-bullying or anti-stalking policies in your workplace or school. It helps to know at what point, for example, someone can be arrested for doing certain things (lurking around your property, making demeaning posts about you on social media, etc.)

    As for writing "false police reports" - in situations where the police are called, everyone will tell the police (and potentially later a judge) their own version of events and sometimes people will outright lie. In my experience (having worked in law enforcement) lies are quite often easy to spot. This is because the truth always adds up, and lies are peppered with inconsistencies. Don't worry about what someone else says to cover their own behind and just because the police write something down, doesn't mean that they believe it. Often, they are simply making a record of what was said in the event that it needs to be examined in court.
     
  6. Jun 2, 2014 #5

    Evo

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    If you are being bullied, have you stopped to consider what you might be doing to attract bullies? Not saying that you are contributing, but based on your other posts here that were deleted, maybe you need to stop and ask if you are part of the problem.
     
  7. Jun 3, 2014 #6
    Evo you do realize that telling someone they deserve abuse makes you verbally abusive and a cyberbully!
    READING ALL MY OTHER POSTS??

    GROSSSSSSSSSSS
    Do not reply or I will be reporting you to the authorities. I truly don't want anything to do with you so I prefer if you don't even talk to me.
     
    Last edited: Jun 3, 2014
  8. Jun 3, 2014 #7

    Borek

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    She never said you deserve abuse. Do you know what is the Olweus classification of the bullying victims? Basically there are two types: passive and provocative victims. All the Evo says is that your posts so far can suggest you are in the latter group. It doesn't mean you deserve abuse, it means you probably attract abuse by your own actions. That's something completely different.

    It happens my wife teaches bullied kids how to change their behavior so that they no longer provoke abuse. It works. One of the things you should stop doing is misrepresenting others statements and exaggeration.
     
    Last edited: Jun 3, 2014
  9. Jun 3, 2014 #8
    The way you totally misunderstood Evo's post and then accused her of being cyberbully is totally ridiculous. This is probably the kind of behavior that is getting you bullied. Are you not aware of it?

    I kind of hope you're just trolling and not really this unaware. People on the physics forums are very nice and spend a lot of time helping people out. They aren't a good troll target and you're wasting your time looking for anyone to give angry/funny responses.
     
  10. Jun 3, 2014 #9

    Choppy

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    Not to mention, mentors have a responsibility to monitor what people are posting on this site, so they will regularly check out the posts made by new members.
     
  11. Jun 3, 2014 #10

    jedishrfu

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    Here's an article on bullying from PBS:

    http://www.pbs.org/thisemotionallife/topic/bullying

    One of the discussion points was how there is a nuanced hierarchy of bullying in the school and work setting where victims are also bullies to other kids.

    One particularly famous work example was in the Schenectady City School District and was chronicled in the NPR show This American Life:

    http://www.thisamericanlife.org/radio-archives/episode/419/petty-tyrant

    A friend of mine who's not one to be easily intimidated worked for this guy and was terrified of what he might do next as were many other coworkers.
     
  12. Jun 3, 2014 #11

    DataGG

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    OP is banned, am I right? Is he/she banned for his/her answer to Evo?!
     
  13. Jun 3, 2014 #12

    Evo

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    No. Additional posts they made caused their ban. Trolling is not acceptable.
     
  14. Jun 3, 2014 #13

    disregardthat

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    OP seems like an obvious troll to me...
     
  15. Jun 3, 2014 #14

    Evo

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    Time to close this since the OP no longer exists.
     
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