Holy S***! What a Ride - Life in 2020

[Astronuc]

"Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body.

The goal is to skid in broadside; tires smoking, body all dented, leaking fluids and fuel gauge on empty, thoroughly used up and worn out, and loudly proclaiming - Holy S***! What a Ride!"

Author Unknown apparently.

That's about the way things are going these days.

 

[Moonbear]

I was thinking something similar not long ago after being stuck behind a funeral procession for a long part of my drive. It was a long procession complete with police escorts to block intersections so they could keep going. And I was thinking, if it was going to be my last ride and I got to have police escorts, I wouldn't want to go slow, I'd want that hearse to floor it down the interstate! If nobody else can keep up, too bad, I don't want slow people at my funeral, especially if they're so slow they can't keep up with a dead body.

 

[Danger]

Hi;
I'm just following Moonbear around because that little kitty is so cute. Why not eliminate the hearse and get a replica of Grandpa Munster's drag-racing coffin? (And don't try to tell me that you never watched that!)

 

[SOS2008]

That's about the way things are going these days.

I'm assuming you mean this also is an analogy to the general state of things, but thought I should ask if you're referring to your own life? I'm starting to reflect on my life--eek!

 

[Danger]

As funerals go, I like the one that my great-uncle threatened my grandmother with (this was some time ago, since my mother is 92 and my father would be 104 in June if he hadn't packed it up a while back). When she indicated that she didn't want anything too fancy, he said "Relax, Mary. I'm just going to sharpen you up to a point and drive you into the ground."

 

[hypatia]

Life goes well for me, even in the worst of times. lol My cars{my life} been ticketed for carless driveing more times then I care to admit, but its all been good in the long run.

 

[Danger]

Life might indeed be a *****, but it beats the hell out of the alternative. I'm not particularly afraid of dying; I just don't care to think of a universe that doesn't include me.
I really am heading to bed, Hypatia (or maybe didn't see new message?); I stopped here for a second because I saw your name on the menu. Good night.

 

[Astronuc]

I'm assuming you mean this also is an analogy to the general state of things, but thought I should ask if you're referring to your own life?

Both actually.

It's been one of those weeks at work.

Culmination of a frustrating month.

Reputation on the line because of others' mistakes or agenda.

 

[russ_watters]

Well, I don't know about the funeral itself, except for the open casket thing. I mean, since I'll be 95 when I go (I have decided), do I really want an open casket? Ehh, it'll be irrelevant anyway - on my 95th birthday, I'm going to play golf, maybe go for a jog, then go skydiving and not pull the rip cord.

 

[Moonbear]

Why not eliminate the hearse and get a replica of Grandpa Munster's drag-racing coffin? (And don't try to tell me that you never watched that!)

Yep, definitely watched the Munsters.

 

[Moonbear]

Well, I don't know about the funeral itself, except for the open casket thing. I mean, since I'll be 95 when I go (I have decided), do I really want an open casket? Ehh, it'll be irrelevant anyway - on my 95th birthday, I'm going to play golf, maybe go for a jog, then go skydiving and not pull the rip cord.

Only 95? That seems a bit young. If at 95 I'm still able to spend a day playing golf, jogging and skydiving, I'm pretty sure I won't be ready to die yet. But a spectacular crash while electric wheelchair drag racing sounds like a possible way to consider going.

 

[hypatia]

No moonbear! I have ideas for a heavily modified suspension system! You don't half to die that way!

 

[Danger]

Why restrict yourself to electric wheelchairs. Chrysler has a contest going on right now requesting ideas of what you would like to put a Hemi in.

 

[russ_watters]

Why restrict yourself to electric wheelchairs. Chrysler has a contest going on right now requesting ideas of what you would like to put a Hemi in.

Hmm, why stop there? A variation on the original Darwin Award (this wouldn't qualify, as you'll be too old to get the award): The JATO Wheelchair!

For those who don't know: http://darwinawards.com/darwin/darwin1995-04.html

 

[franznietzsche]

Well, I don't know about the funeral itself, except for the open casket thing. I mean, since I'll be 95 when I go (I have decided), do I really want an open casket? Ehh, it'll be irrelevant anyway - on my 95th birthday, I'm going to play golf, maybe go for a jog, then go skydiving and not pull the rip cord.

I know i won't have an open casket, if there's enough left of me to have one, then i must have done something horribly out of character

 

[Moonbear]

Hmm, why stop there? A variation on the original Darwin Award (this wouldn't qualify, as you'll be too old to get the award): The JATO Wheelchair!

For those who don't know: http://darwinawards.com/darwin/darwin1995-04.html

I have to admit, that sounds like a great way to go. One final thrill then instant pulverization!

 

[Danger]

If an oxygen mask and orthopedic support clothing come with the wheelchair, do you suppose one could briefly go orbital without harm?

 

[Astronuc]

My brother's birthday

Today would have been my youngest brother's 39th birthday.

He died 4.5 years ago from leukemia. The last days before he slipped into unconsciousness were particlarly torturous as his organs began to fail. He was restrained because he just wanted all the tubes removed. He was on a ventilator with clean air, so lips and gumbs were dry and cracked, and his tongue was swollen. I last saw him alive the day of my father's birthday (day before mine) and 5 days before he died. He could barely move, pretty much only his eyes. I kissed him on the forehead, told him I loved him, told him we would look after his wife and son, and that we would never forget him.

My brother was 8.5 years younger than me. I used to look out for him, when he was little. Then I left home when he was 9, and come back infrequently.

Just when I thought I was going to have a chance to get to know him as an adult, he was gone.

I miss him very much.

March 19 is particularly hard for my parents, who lost their youngest son, and my sister-in-law, now a widow for 4.5 years. She is slowly coming out of it, but there is no way to replace what she lost, and that is made more painful when she spends time with her friends who have husbands.

My nephew was only three, and he just had his 7th birthday two weeks ago. He spent a couple of years waiting for his dad to return. He is now resigned to the fact that dad is gone. My sister-in-law is doing a great job raising him alone.

We do the best we can.

 

[Tsu]

When I die, I want to go peacefully and in my sleep like my grandfather did. Not yelling and screaming like all of the passengers in his car...

 

[Tsu]

Oh, wow. There's a page two to this thread. I missed it!

I'm so sorry to hear about your brother, Astronuc. My heart is breaking for you and your family. Do you get to see your nephew much?

 

[Andy]

The way I am going i think i will be very lucky if i get to see 25.

 

[Astronuc]

I'm so sorry to hear about your brother, Astronuc. My heart is breaking for you and your family. Do you get to see your nephew much?

I saw him two weeks ago. I took a side trip while returning from a business trip.

My other brother and his family moved back for a few years, but it did not work out for him. He was a surrogate father for awhile.

My father spends a lot of time with him. My dad (papa) is sort of surrogate father as well.