Is love real or is it a vistigial artifact of human pair bonding that is no longer relevant

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By now someone should have said, "Define 'real'."

No emotion is real in the sense that none represents some objective reality. However, they're all real to the extent we actually experience them and they affect our actions and behavior.

I recall a few years back in a thread about dreams, one poster reported having a dream about a lizard. He could tell by looking into its eyes it was a girl lizard, and somehow he felt the most profound love and affection for it, and spent some part of the dream protecting it from a vague threat. That's how real love is. It's a strong and demanding emotion that is, weirdly, transferable to almost anything under different circumstances. The illusion of love, or any emotion, is the belief it is caused by, and is an objective response to, the external thing we feel evokes it.

I don't know what to do with that. I'm just saying it seems to be the way it is.
 
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  • #27
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Didn't we learn something from the movie Bob & Carol & Ted & Alice? That ideal of free love in the 60's had it's complications. It's not that I'm not on board with some kind of sexual liberation, I know there's a community out there that's still striving for the free/love open marriage swinger ideal, I'm just not buying it, though. I think you lose more than you gain when you go against one on one love, there's something important there.

Like I said, I think it's largely an artifact of social constructs that dyads are so highly emphasized in human relationships.

Polyamory isn't for everyone, I'm not asking you to buy it for yourself, but if you look at the statistics, promiscuity is really quite natural in humans, in many forms, often involving cheating in monogamous relationships (something diminished greatly in the polyamory community).

Also, I wouldn't take your lessons on polyamory from a movie and the 60's, in which "wife swapping" is emphasized. Besides being a sexist perspective, it really only represents a very small fraction of what polyamory is about.
 
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