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Modify an old saying or cliche'

  1. Feb 7, 2006 #1
    There is a pretty bright group of people here, so this could be fun. Just start with the cliche' and then tell us your modification.

    Such as:
    "My mind is like a steel trap." It used to be sharp, but it's getting rusty.

    Something like that. Make up a few or share some that you've heard.

    Here is a site for cliche's that you could work with. have fun.

  2. jcsd
  3. Feb 7, 2006 #2
    Here's another:

    Over the hill.

    I don't mind being over the hill, but now my brakes are failing!
  4. Feb 7, 2006 #3
    "You can't teach an old dog new tricks."

    But you can't learn how to lick yourself either.
    Last edited: Feb 7, 2006
  5. Feb 7, 2006 #4


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    If time flies like an arrow, why do fruit flies like a banana?
  6. Feb 7, 2006 #5
    I like it DaveC426913.

    "You can lead a horse to water..." but he's not going to build a boat.
  7. Feb 7, 2006 #6


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  8. Feb 7, 2006 #7
    Those could work.

    "A bird in the hand..." will probably make your fingers stink.
  9. Feb 7, 2006 #8


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    More a mixture than a modification, I guess, but I like to say 'you can lead a horse to fire, but you can't make him smoke'.
  10. Feb 7, 2006 #9
    Does the pope s**t in the woods?
  11. Feb 7, 2006 #10
    "One in the hand is worth two in the bush" or well what ever else you want to think about while you have one in the hand.

    "Never count yer chikens before they hatch" you may feel like an omlette in the morning.
  12. Feb 7, 2006 #11

    jimmy p

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    "I got it straight from the horse's mouth." what, horse spit?
  13. Feb 7, 2006 #12

    Chi Meson

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    "The quickest way to a man's heart is through his stomach."

    Actually, that one's already a bit weird.
  14. Feb 7, 2006 #13

    jimmy p

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    "Many a mickle makes a muckle" if you are martian.
  15. Feb 7, 2006 #14
    "A compliment is a statement of an agreeable truth; flattery is the statement of an agreeable untruth" and flirtation is a means to an end.
  16. Feb 7, 2006 #15

    Ivan Seeking

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    A little self-defecating humor is always appreciated.

    Send us your poor, huddled, well-educated masses.

    Be happy; don't worry. Got some extra change, dude?

    Four out of five doctors prefer three out of four dentists.

    I could be wrong, but as a matter of practice, let's assume that I'm not.
  17. Feb 7, 2006 #16
    "I don't know what the weapons of WWIII will be but I know the Weapons of world War IV will be fought with sticks and stones"Albert Einstien
    So during WWIII there going to have cool time weapons and then there going to go back to the stone age and the have fight sticks stones for WWIV to get there time machine back
  18. Feb 7, 2006 #17
    "That's as easy as shooting fish in a barrel"

    First you have to find a barrel that has fish in it, if you don't have a gun, then you need a permit and that can take weeks to process, then you have to get a gun, load it, learn how it works, then you have to tgry and shoot the fish (if they are still alive after several weeks in the barrel without food), then you have to account for refraction so the fish isn't really where you are aiming, but I guess after missing a few times and shooting a few holes in the barrel so the water drains out, leaving the fish sitting on the bottom, where it would be easy to shoot them.
  19. Feb 7, 2006 #18
    "Money makes the world go around" I just want enough to keep my car going.
  20. Feb 8, 2006 #19

    Ivan Seeking

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    Ghosts were people too.

    A mummy is something that never stops giving.” – a noted archeologist

    Flying a plane is like riding a bike...it’s just harder to put the baseball cards in the spokes.
    -Robert Stack; Airplane.

    Caution: Objects in mirror are more confused than they appear

    Gloria: Do you know that 60 percent of all deaths in America are caused by guns?
    Archie Bunker: Would it make you feel any better if dey was pushed out of windows?
    ---Carol OConner; All in the Family

    Absence of evidence is not evidence of absence – you can take comfort in the fact that if something doesn't exist, it won't be detected.

    Know thyself - but not before ball games or wrestling matches.

    A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step - no, it begins with a map.

    And the lion will lie down with the lamb...at least until dinner time.

    A. Einstein: “God doesn’t play dice” [with the universe]
    Niels Bohr: “Who are you to say what God does?”

    Such a tangled web we weave when first we practice to perceive.

    I estimate that I will publish in about 10^24 years

    "Speak the truth, but leave immediately after."
  21. Feb 8, 2006 #20


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    OK, I don't know if this is exactly what you had in mind for this thread, but I have to start it off with a story (and I may even get bleeped along the way here). Ooooh.... intrigue!!

    A guy walks into a doctor's office complaining about a problem. The doctor asks what the problem is. He replied "Well, it's like this, Doc. Every time I fart, it sounds like "Honda!""

    The doctor is taken aback when he hears this. He says "Can you fart now?". So the guy does it, and yes, it does sounds like "Honda".

    The doctor ponders a bit and says that it is a very unusual situation. "We will have to do some tests, and you should come back next week when we have them in", the doctor says.

    So next week arrives and the guy comes back to see the doctor.

    "Good news", the doctor exclaims. "It was just a bad case of abscess in your stomach. We can give you some medication that should take care of that."

    So the guy gets the prescription for the medication and walks away happy.

    Moral of the story: Abscess Makes Your Fart Goes Honda!


    [Well, that IS a modification of an old saying, no?!]

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