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Need help please!

  1. Jan 28, 2008 #1
    Hey all. I need some help with asking a girl out, who I think might already have a boyfriend, but I'm not at all sure of that fact. Anyways, we have one class together and she's really cool. Smart, pretty, and of similar personality to me. We've gotten to each other pretty well. Any suggestions?Thanks
     
  2. jcsd
  3. Jan 28, 2008 #2

    Moonbear

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    I'd start off by talking to her and finding a way to casually bring up the subject of boyfriends/girlfriends to determine if she really does have a boyfriend and whether that's a good relationship. No point spinning your wheels on her if she's in a happy relationship already.
     
  4. Jan 28, 2008 #3
    Ask her if she would like to go to a movie (or something similar) this coming weekend. If she says that she's busy, or that she has a boyfriend, don't act disappointed. Any apparent disappointment can make her feel uncomfortable, and cause your friendship to wan.
     
  5. Jan 28, 2008 #4
    KK, easier said than done though, but thanks.
     
  6. Jan 29, 2008 #5
    Darn, I figured Cyrus or Evo would have some witty suggestion(s).
     
  7. Jan 29, 2008 #6
    Stalk her down on either myspace or facebook and look to see if she has a bf or if she "is in a relationship." Yeah it sounds psychopathic, but it is effective.
     
  8. Jan 29, 2008 #7
    I don't usually offer dating advice but I've recently (like over the last year) made some pretty vast strides in this area of my life:

    Don't assume that she's worth your time - approach it as if you're trying to see whether or not she's worth YOUR time (that doesn't mean be an a-hole).

    The truth is whether or not she has a boyfriend is irrelevant - attraction will (or won't) happen regardless.

    As far as asking her out.. I would maybe casually mention that some friends are having a party, and then later in the conversation ask if she wanted to come... don't ask her out on a "date"... too much pressure. keep it casual.
     
  9. Jan 29, 2008 #8

    Danger

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    Given my past relationships, I would recommend that you pay close attention to what Moonbear or Evo tell you. I've only been on it from the stupid (male) side...
     
  10. Jan 29, 2008 #9

    Astronuc

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    Does one mean "We've gotten to know each other pretty well"?

    Actually if it was me, I'd ask her if she had a boyfriend or if she was seeing someone, and if not I'd ask her out.

    I think back in high school and university, about half the time, the girl would ask me out, which I preferred.

    One of my biggest regrets in high school was not asking a girl from my history class to my senior prom. She sat right behind me, and when I finally asked her, she had already accepted a date from another guy. Apparently she was disappointed that I handn't asked her first. :rolleyes:
     
  11. Jan 29, 2008 #10
    Oh, yes Astro, that was a typo. Yeah, we left class yesterday together and talked/walked for quite a ways before we had to split to ou respective classes. I walked without thinking to say "goodbye" and now I even feel bad about that.
    Grave- I've already done that and added her, we talk pretty often via Myspace. Her site says "in a relationship" but those things don't always get updated. Anyways, I think I found the bloke (her bf) after a bulletin she posted. Thanks all.
     
  12. Jan 29, 2008 #11
    Who cares if she has a boyfriend?
     
  13. Jan 29, 2008 #12
    LOL, what exactly are you suggesting then?
     
  14. Jan 29, 2008 #13
    That it dont mean squat if she has a boyfriend. If she likes you she will ditch him and stick with you stud muffin. Thats what Im suggesting. Unless hes your friend, what do you care about that guy?
     
  15. Jan 29, 2008 #14

    Danger

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    I strongly suspect that Astro is of the same mind as me on this. We both had possibilities that we missed out on... but neither of us would be the people that we are, with the women who really make us complete, had those possibilities not been missed out on.
    If someone ever asks me if I could change anything about my past, I would have to say 'no'. I've done some things that hurt others, and I'm ashamed of, but I would probably be a far worse person had I not learned from that. Despite her having to stalk me into submission over the course of a couple of months, W is the best thing that has ever happened to me in my life. The only time in my life that I was happy was when I was in the air... and then I got grounded on a medical issue about 35 years ago. Now, I'm happy again. I'm really glad that none of those 'exes' worked out. (And they're all still friends... bonus...)
     
    Last edited: Jan 29, 2008
  16. Jan 29, 2008 #15
    He's not my friend, I don't know him, thankfully. I guess I'll just keep it up and try to get on her (even) better side.
     
  17. Jan 29, 2008 #16
    Unless she says, 'im not interested im seeing someone', treat it as if she does not have a boyfriend. (or some random guy comes up to you and pounds your head in :rofl:)
     
  18. Jan 29, 2008 #17
    Danger, I think you should get the award of "Funniest Member of PF"
     
  19. Jan 29, 2008 #18

    Danger

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    Just be careful. I don't know where you live, but in some social situations you could end up with a muzzle imprint on your lips. I'm not trying to be scary here, but the reality is that it might not be a safe situatiion. Watch your back.

    edit: Sorry, I posted before reading your last entry. I definitely think that you have the potential to be the funniest member, but this thread isn't the appropriate place to apply.
     
    Last edited: Jan 29, 2008
  20. Jan 29, 2008 #19
    "Muzzle imprint" are you saying I might get a fist to the mouth, or the opposite?
     
  21. Jan 29, 2008 #20
    If some guy says 'thats my girlfriend bla bla bla', just tell him the truth. Im sorry, I wasnt aware because she didnt mention she was in a relationship. If she wants to walk down that road its her problem with him, not yours. Her BF doesnt own her, and has no right to control who she hangs out with.
     
    Last edited: Jan 29, 2008
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