Not talking to people

  • Thread starter R.P.F.
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  • #26
225
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... You shouldn't not socialize because of fear, human beings are born to social with others, and it's easy to make friends if you want them ...

Exactly. It's not that difficult to find friend friends, or at least people with common interests with whom you can talk to, if you just try. Join a community, like a math or science club, and you'll be surrounded by people with interests more or less the same as yours.

It's a little arrogant when people act as if every stranger whom they converse with is an ignorant, boring person with nothing good to say. Maybe quit chatting it up with randies at a bar if you're looking to talk about math.

Maybe the reason some of you don't talk with others often is because you go into conversations with your self-imposed superiority, expecting the other person to be stupid and boring. People catch on to that pretty quickly, and nobody appreciates it.

Besides, you're a relatively boring conversationalist if all you ever want to talk about is politics or math or science or philosophy.
 
  • #27
575
47
I prefer the company of a very small group of people and I'm not very friendly to people I don't know.
I'm extremely friendly to people I don't know, IF they're nice. It's like there's so many a-holes in the world that when I find a person that's friendly, I'm overly nice to them to compensate.

I don't want a bunch of friends whom I need to divide my time to hang out with. I'd just like to have a bunch of people I know who I can email or when I see them around campus I can say hi, that's all. That usually only happens if I have a class with someone and afterwards we'll see each other around and say hi. People probably don't think I'm very friendly by the way I keep to myself sometimes, like in my computer science class. But I'm really outgoing in classes where socializing is required. And once people get to know me, that's when they start to like me. It's hard not to like me once you get to know me. That's how I think a lot of people are, I just don't know because I never talk to them. That's one reason why I want to start talking to people more.
Besides, you're a relatively boring conversationalist if all you ever want to talk about is politics or math or science or philosophy.
Lucky for me, I'm too ignorant to know enough about those topics to talk about them with anybody. I'll talk about whatever, though, and try to put on the table the things that I do know.
 
  • #28
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Has anyone ever been through this kind of periods in their lives when they either lose interest in talking to people or couldn't find anyone to talk to?
For me, no.

I will just wait till I actually meet people I want to talk to.
I think that's the best way to approach it. I don't look for people to talk to, but if one of my neighbor's happens to be outside when I am, then we talk. When I'm playing a tennis match, then my opponent and I talk (usually about tennis) during breaks. When I go to a movie with somebody, then we talk about the movie. When I'm sharing a meal with somebody, then we talk about ... whatever. And so on.

Of course, if you have something you want to say and nobody around to say it to (or that you want to say it to), then there are online forums like PF.
 

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