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Olympic commentator comedy gold

  1. Sep 2, 2004 #1
    These are hilarious!!!

    Here are the top nine comments made by NBC sports commentators during the [2004] Summer Olympics that they would like to take back

    1. Weightlifting commentator: "This is Gregoriava from Bulgaria. I saw her snatch this morning during her warm up and it was amazing."

    2. Dressage commentator: "This is really a lovely horse and I speak from personal experience since I once mounted her mother."

    3. Paul Hamm, Gymnast: "I owe a lot to my parents, especially my mother and father."

    4. Boxing Analyst: "Sure there have been injuries,and even some deaths in boxing, but none of them really that serious."

    5. Softball announcer: "If history repeats itself, I should think we can expect the same thing again."

    6. Basketball analyst: "He dribbles a lot and the opposition doesn't like it. In fact you can see it all over their faces."

    7. At the rowing medal ceremony: "Ah, isn't that nice, the wife of the IOC president is hugging the cox of the British crew."

    8. Soccer commentator: "Julian Dicks is everywhere. It's like they've got eleven Dicks on the field."

    9. Tennis commentator: "One of the reasons Andy is playing so well is that, before the final round, his wife takes out his balls and kisses them . . . Oh my God, what have I just said?"
  2. jcsd
  3. Sep 2, 2004 #2


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    Greg, where did you get these from because these are not all from NBC nor the olympics, Julian Dicks is a British soccer player (retired now I believ) and Britain have not fielded a soccer team at the olympics since before Julian Dicks was born(tho' I've heard the quote before).

    Sid Waddell the darts commentator has come up with a few classics:

    "That's the greatest comeback since Lazarus."

    "When Alexander of Macedonia was 33, he cried salt tears because there were no more worlds to conquer. Bristow's only 27."

    "It's the nearest thing to public execution this side of Saudi Arabia."

    You couldn't get more excitement here if Elvis Presley walked in eating a chip sandwich!"

    "Trying to read Reyes's mind is like trying to read the mind of Jabba the Hutt"

    "These guys look calm but inside they are as nervous as a vampire who knows there's a sale at the wooden stake shop in the morning

    "Eyes like a pterodactyl....with contact lenses"

    "It's just like taking a sausage from a boy in a wheelchair."

    "It's just like taking a sausage from a boy in a wheelchair."
  4. Sep 2, 2004 #3

    jimmy p

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    It is sad when people get excited over darts. I could actually imagine this guy sitting in the commentators booth getting really worked up and spouting such trite!
  5. Sep 2, 2004 #4


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    Trite ! You little scalawag ! Have you no appreciation for the finer things in life ? The man speaks of History, and Geography and Biology and Cinematography.

    Oh, and darts suck. :frown:
  6. Sep 2, 2004 #5


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    Actually, I imagine if you're a sports commentator and got stuck with the darts competition as your assignment, you'd probably have a lot of time to come up with those sorts of comments trying to say anything to fill dead air and make it sound interesting. Besides, darts just shouldn't be an olympic sport. It's meant to be played in a bar/pub with a beer in one hand. Then again, I've never fully seen the wisdom to handing drunken people sharp pointy things to throw around in a crowded room.
  7. Sep 3, 2004 #6


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    I quite like darts actually, many is the time I'd go to my 'local' to throw a few 'arrows' an to drink a few 'jars'.

    Dart players (or "dartists" as i call them) are true atheletes, this is the current world champion:

    http://www.andythevikingfordham.com/index.php?pageval=biography.php [Broken]
    Last edited by a moderator: May 1, 2017
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