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Perhaps There's Hope For Me Yet

  1. Feb 27, 2005 #1
    Quoted from John Tesh's Radio Show .

    "And one last tip for asking out that great gal you work with: Channel your inner James Bond. Vranich says nothing’s guaranteed to impress a girl like simply being classy and gentlemanly. If you’re going to lunch at the same time, hold the door for her, or the elevator. Or offer to get her a cup of coffee on your way to the break room. These little gestures will make you stand out. And when the time comes to ask her out, you’ll have a leg-up."

    I guess I'm not out of the game, yet. I can totally do that!!!
     
  2. jcsd
  3. Feb 27, 2005 #2
    Have you not been doing that? Maybe I am just an ultra gentleman, but I always do whatever I can for a lady.
     
  4. Feb 27, 2005 #3
    I never said I haven't. The last thing I said, "I can totally do that", kind of referred that I have and will be doing it. :rolleyes: :wink:
     
  5. Feb 27, 2005 #4

    Math Is Hard

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    But is John Tesh really the guy to take advice in "studliness" from?
    hmmm....
     
  6. Feb 27, 2005 #5

    Math Is Hard

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    Nevermind, I see it's from a self-help guru. I am still skeptical.
     
  7. Feb 28, 2005 #6

    honestrosewater

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    I was thinking the same thing. :rofl: John Tesh as the next James Bond... :rofl:
     
  8. Feb 28, 2005 #7

    Math Is Hard

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    LOL!!! :rofl: :rofl:
    The name is Tesh, John Tesh..
     
  9. Feb 28, 2005 #8

    honestrosewater

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    As he plays the theme song on his accordion. (I think he plays the accordion.)
     
  10. Feb 28, 2005 #9
    Playing a bit of a devil's advocate here :biggrin: . A mine of useful/or not information on relationship can be found here.

    Of course the operative word here is "attracting". Once you get her attention, you will have to play a whole new ball game. Good luck Chrono o:) .

    Attracting Women
    « H » Host :: email link
    DON'T SEEK HER APPROVAL.

    If your seeking approval she is pushed away. If your not seeking her approval it's more likely you will attract her. Don't ever take steps to get her to like you. Act as if you don't care what she thinks of you.

    In every situation with a woman, you can say. WHATEVER you want to say in a way that either:

    1) Seeks her approval.

    2) Doesn't seek her approval

    Think about it.

    You're either SEEKING APPROVAL... or you're NOT...And most guys ARE when they're talking to a woman that they're interested in. Big mistake!





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    CONTROL YOUR EMOTIONS AROUND WOMEN
    Remember, when it comes to ATTRACTION, all of the "normal" rules change.

    You have to stop thinking about what you've learned about being a "nice guy" to other people, and realize that a woman's ATTRACTION isn't triggered by you being "nice".

    So I have TWO good reasons why need to learn how to control your emotions around women:

    1) If your emotions take control early on, you probably won't even be able to talk to her, call her, or ask
    her out. You'll just be too freaked out to even make your first move.

    2) Women aren't ATTRACTED to guys who let their emotions control them all the time. This is ESPECIALLY true when the guy acts like a wimp.

    In a woman's mind, if a man is nice, he's weak.






    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    ATTRACTION MISTAKES
    It’s the things you are doing that determine his or her level of interest in you.. So if it’s not you – defined as your looks, personality, background, and so on –it must be your that determines the direction and, ultimately, the outcome of the relationship. behavior toward this person

    This very powerful, yet simple psychological strategy can be summed up in one sentence:

    You need to behave with the women you don’t like the way you’ve been behaving with the women you do like.

    You need to behave with the women you do like the way you’ve been behaving with the women you don’t like.






    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    KINDNESS AND BEING NICE
    Unless you only want her as a friend don't be too nice to her. Being nice usually drives her away and you'll likely be rejected. Women are more attracted to "Nasty Men" than "nice guys". Women are very strange. Nasty men make her feel sexy and kind men turn her off. Many Women are not attracted to men who are kind, stable and reliable. She finds such men boring. In a woman's mind, if a man is kind, he's weak






    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    DON'T COMPLIMENT HER TOO SOON
    Women like compliments that they have to WORK FOR a lot more than the ones that just come to them. By complimenting her too soon will make her think you're just an approval seeker and that makes you very unattractive to her.




    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    ACTING NEEDY
    Don't act needy by calling her too often or send too many emails at first. Don't send her flowers. Let the suspense build. Calling her too often makes you less attractive to her. Let her know she is not your whole word and that you do have a life outside of her. Act like you can easily live without her and that you don't need her. Keep up your masculine pretense!






    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    TELLING HER HOW YOU FEEL
    Don't tell her that she means the world to you and that you love her. If you do the game is over. Again, to keep the attraction going let her know that you have a life and do very well without her. Act indifferent. Women prefer emotionally unavailable men and not wimps. Give her a challenge to get you. Your not easy. In strange way women see this indifferent attitude as confidence.






    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    PASSING HER TESTS
    If a woman looks at you and makes eye contact don't look away suddenly as though you're shy. If you do she will consider you a wimp. Hold the eye contact long enough so that she knows you have courage and won't be intimidated by her. If you break eye contact too quickly you failed her test.

    If you have just met woman at a bar and she asks you to buy her a drink and you say, OK what would you like. She knows she can control your actions and that you want her to like you, you have just failed another one of her tests. She knows you will relinquish your power to her and she'll find that very unattractive.







    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    WIMP

    In a woman's mind, if a man is nice, he's weak. Never act like a wimp around women you are trying to attract. Always act self-confident. And, once again, never try to get her to like you by doing things for her. Never let her see your fear of rejection. If she rejects you take it like a man and don't show your hurt.



    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    SENSITIVE AND OPEN
    Women often say they want to find a man who is in touch with his feelings, They say they want a man who is open and sensiitive. The problem is that she rejects such a man for one who is emotionally unavailable. Don't listen to her lies.





    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    BORING
    No Boring Relationships please? "Women tend to look to relationships for excitement and thrills. This explains, at least in part, why so many women find themselves drawn to men who promise a challenge and a sense of intrigue. Someone like a jerk. So you'll have to give her excitement and thrills if you want to attract her.

    Women consider sex with a responsible man boring too. So let's make sure she's never bored.



    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    JERKS
    I just want a nice guy," women whine. Then they date the first drunken leather-clad jerk who spills his drink on her dress. If her relationship with a jerk fails she can blame it on him. But if her relationship with a kind man fails she gets some of the blame herself. It's safer to stick it out with a jerk. Women encourage men to be jerks. You see it all the time…women being attracted to a man considered bastards… the ones who treat them like crap…the ones who ignore them… the ones who talk down to them. They love it and keep the ball rolling. They actually encourage his jerk behavior. To be attractive become a jerk.



    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    MOTHER'S TRAINING
    Mother's teach their son's to be kind and respectful. By doing this she is making her son very unattractive to women. Men have to regroup and learn to act like an a real man or a jerk to attract women. See how mother's training hurt men's romantic life?




    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    SAY NO

    Don't cater to a beautiful woman's whims. Say no and don't take any crap from her. Then she'll find you very attractive like she does the jerks.



    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    HER SEXUAL FANTASY
    A woman's sexual fantasies are aroused by a sexy jerk and not a kind and loving men. So learn to be more like a jerk and forget the kind man stuff. In a woman's mind, if a man is kind, he's weak




    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    WOMEN WANT MEN WHO KNOW WHAT TO SAY
    "Less Is More" The first time or two that you speak to a woman you're interested in isn't the time to try and really engage her interest, it's the time to "spark" her interest.

    "If You Want Someone To Be Interested In You Be Interested In Them"

    "Use Open Ended Questions To Get The Conversation Flowing"

    "If You Want Someone To Be Interested In You Be A Good Listener"

    "If You Want Someone To Be Interested In You Be Interesting To Them"

    "Make The Act Of Asking For Her Number Or Email Casual And Easy"


    attrach a woman.
     
  11. Feb 28, 2005 #10
    Hmm, I guess I am too nice. Ok, I am going to be a real jackass to women for the next week or two, lets see how this plays out.
     
  12. Feb 28, 2005 #11

    Moonbear

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    Polly, I have to say that is some of the worst relationship advice I've ever read. Seems that site you got it from thinks the only way for men to get a date is to treat women like s**t.

    Last night I caught an episode of Blind Date where they matched up two total geeks (both were self-admitted geeks even). Awww...it was so sweet, they made such a great couple even on a first, blind date. Compared to the usual sleezy people on that show who seem focused entirely on the subject of sex, these two talked about computers and morals, and you could tell there's the potential of a real relationship building out of this.

    So, don't despair Chrono, there's plenty of hope for you still. You're just going to skip right past all those lousy relationships that don't work out and go straight for the one who's right for you.
     
  13. Feb 28, 2005 #12

    Evo

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    Oh my.

    :surprised WRONG!!!! That would make me feel like he's not interested and I would leave him if he didn't get a clue very quickly. :grumpy:

    :rofl: Guys, don't listen to this!! :bugeye:
     
  14. Feb 28, 2005 #13
    You singled those two out, are the the rest ok?
     
  15. Feb 28, 2005 #14

    Evo

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    No!!! I have such a headache I can hardly type, so that's all I could do.
     
  16. Feb 28, 2005 #15
    Hmm, ok I will listen to you. I did not really want to be mean to ladies for the next week anyway, it would be too hard, and the risk of getting slapped too great.
     
  17. Feb 28, 2005 #16

    Kerrie

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    Polly, I think this is horrible advice! No offense, but really, this advice is for those who like to play games and base a relationship on power. Guys, if you are sincere in your efforts of pursuing a sincere woman, don't even pay attention to this.

    Polly, did you mean to post this as actual advice?
     
  18. Feb 28, 2005 #17

    Evo

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    I think she meant in tongue in cheek. :tongue:
     
  19. Feb 28, 2005 #18
    I think when attracting women initially, Polly's advice works great for the most part. Of course it depends on what type of woman you are trying to attract too. It works best for the one-night-standish type and worst for the nerdy shy-ish type we all love. Then once you have them in a relationship you have to change your ball game and be nicer though. Read "Surely You're Joking Mr. Feynman" by Richard Feynman - looks like it works for him too.
     
  20. Feb 28, 2005 #19
    Ohh yeah, I remember that part in Surely...Feynman, hmmm if Feynman says it works then it must be worth a shot. That was when he was at a bar right? And he would not pay for a ladies drink, and then she wanted him later lol
     
  21. Feb 28, 2005 #20
    Um, I only date/ am attracted to nice guys... I must be weird or something because my boyfriend is one of the nicest guys I know. I also did take note when we first met and he walked quickly as we approached a building so he could open the door, but then what do I know.
    *goes off to ponder*
     
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