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Purpose of Life

  1. May 30, 2004 #1
    Well I have lived now for 19 years and never really bothered about life. I was just living with it and had always a goal to reach. But now in my year 13 i started asking myself: why ? :confused:

    It's obviously a bad question to ask, cos there are too many answers. But i just wanted to know from you, how do you keep on going ? At the moment I just don't wonna go on, life sux. Intresstingly this does affects my grades. Since a while I have been unconcentrated and unintressted (I even forgot my keys! Never happend before :eek: ). And now panic starts and i don't know what to do ? Also I don't have a goal to reach... know a way to find one ? Please help me. thx :uhh:

    Small Question : What's the point of parties ? People get drunk and do stupid stuff they would never have done if they wouldn't have been drunk. Why ? :confused:
  2. jcsd
  3. May 30, 2004 #2


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    I don't understand. You've lived for 19 years, but you're only in year 13?

    By the way, man, this isn't a psychological help forum. If you're honestly having these difficulties, the best advice I can give you is to seek out professional help. I'm sure the posters here will have ideas, but I doubt that many of them are licensed therapists or counselors.
  4. May 30, 2004 #3
    That's the exact same question that has boggled my mind when i was in my teens. I've even read about 10 different self-help books to help me find more meaning. They have helped me learn about myself but meaning i had to seek on my own and so must you. No one can tell someone what meaning is because for every person the meaning is different.
    I have had no goals until early this year and i am 22 years old. The thing about goals is sometimes you have to look beyond the careers and goals set for most people through education and seek something you have high interest for or try new things until you find something you have high interest for.

    As for parties. I believe that alcohol lets loose who you are. So if your a liar you will lie. If you feel like fighting people alot you will probaly start a fight.
  5. May 30, 2004 #4
    There is no purpose to life other than the one you invent for yourself. So stop procrastinating, and start inventing.
  6. May 30, 2004 #5
    13 of 19

    He has been asking himself "Why?" since he was in the 13th of his 19 years.
    Last edited: May 30, 2004
  7. May 30, 2004 #6
    It's normal. I think everyone goes through the same thing at that point in their life. I think it is a bi-product of realizing it is time to join the real world...

    My advice, pick something that interests you, whether it's reading or mountain biking, and indulge in it for a while. Whatever activity you choose will allow you to become less focused on your dilema, which will give you a clearer view of how you feel, allowing you to make the right decisions.

    Hang in there! It'll pass!
  8. May 30, 2004 #7
    It's odd. I don't understand this search for a purpose or "meaning" or whatever. I hear that it's supposed to be some universal part of human beings, but the idea and related desire confound me. I have never cared about such a thing. I have always just lived my life according to what I though I should do, not looking for anyone else's design for me. Really, living according to what someone else would want you to do seems degrading to the experience of being alive. How could fulfilling that be any more rewarding than fulfilling a purpose that you assigned yourself?
  9. May 31, 2004 #8
    believe me, you DO know your purpose. the problem is that we get distracted doing and acting in accordance with other's beliefs. this cross road is for you to look inward.

    relax, try meditation and listen to yourself. no one can do this for you OR tell you what your purpose or meaning in life. it is a unique, individual experience.

    do what you want to do. not what your parents, peers or church tell you to do. have confidence that even if you get yourself into a mess; the mess was intended to show you, your way.

    life is a game, a game to be played respectfully. playing and having fun will lead you. listen to yourself!

    olde drunk
  10. May 31, 2004 #9
    I do not believe in any intended purpose in my life (except to make my parents happy--that is why they made me). No purpose will be revealed, only invented.
  11. May 31, 2004 #10
    please explain how you can make anyone happy?

    if you have the power, make me angry or sad or joyous.

    trust me, living to please anyone or thing will cause personal problems. i ask my children to please themselves and be happy. the process is their trip, mine (relative to parenthood) is to offer the best advice and guidance possible. they being happy will make me happy. i can not make them happy.

    we all have an individual unique purpose, even those of us that refuse to accept the concept.

    olde drunk
  12. May 31, 2004 #11
    allright i missused this forum for my personal problems :redface:. about the year 13 thing..... :rolleyes: well in england its year 12 and year 13 :surprise:. Sorry to confuse you :shy: but is it good if you make a mess by finding your way ? Isn't there the problem of using your lazyness as you own way (eg. : "i don't clean my room cos it's my way ?").

    about the booze: so it takes of the moral barriers created by society to release the beast ? :devil: Hm..... intressting
  13. May 31, 2004 #12


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    BlackJack, I asked myself exactly the same thing, also from about 13 years old. I only started to really understand things when I was between 22 and 23.

    The most confusing thing for me was understanding why people behave the way they do. That took me years of thinking to finally understand. People seem to be motivated by malicious desires. The real question is what leads to people feeling malicious in the first place. Why do people chase so dearly after frivolous passtimes that you can see are stupid? Why are they so determined to enjoy it? Why do they put on a facade of fancy clothes and cars and whatever to impress? Who are they trying to impress? Are they trying to impress?

    What I can say to you is that you don't need to conform to what other people think. You don't need to get upset if somebody does something bad to you. Rather than get upset, try to review the evidence and understand why. Look out for it. Life seems like a frothing cesspit at times, but it isn't really. Things happen for a reason. Try to see the reasons.

    How you react to people and how you behave is completely up to you. That is very important to know. Just because everybody else is diong it does not mean that it is good for you to do it. You are your own boss, and you are way capable. The reason you are wondering at the purpose so much is because you see the bogus happenings around you and know you can do better. That is a very good thing indeed.

    I used to feel sad that I didn't enjoy simple pleasures as other people do. I used to think that intelligence and introspection was a curse. It isn't. To gain understanding you need to be introspective.

    Whenever you get a feeling, good or bad, think to yourself why it is that you feel that way. What is it about the situation that was good? Doing this, you may start to find things that you really do like, and not just because other people like it. For example, most guys chase afer girls and make fools of themselves. They think it proves their manhood. It doesn't. You don't have to prove anything to these people.

    Don't always try to be a good person. Realise that one of the major causes of us feeling down is when we try to do a good thing and we get ignored. We see a situation, and try to do what is right, what it seems the people involved want us to do, but then you get ignored, or kicked aside. What did they really want?

    This probably annoys you more than helps you, but as far as I can see it is a good road to follow.
  14. May 31, 2004 #13
    As someone else mentioned, find something you like (a hobby) and occupy yourself with it. If it's driving, go to racing tracks and let yourself get loose for an hour. If it's modeling airplanes, buy some kits and build your own models. And if you don't know what it is, just start experiencing with all sorts of stuff and see what interests you the most. :smile:

    But there's a huge difference between not finding a meaning to one's life and feeling like life sucks and you don't want to carry on living. If the latter is the case I really suggest you seek professional help, for your own good obviously. These days a lot of people go to psychologists (and don't even try to hide it!) so it's no shame.
  15. May 31, 2004 #14


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    At your age it's normal to question things and become disillusioned. However, if you suddenly find your normal ability to concentrate lagging, you lose interest, get panicked, etc... it may be a physical problem with the chemical balance that affects the brain and you may need medication to regain balance. This kind of problem often surfaces in your age group and is extremely common. It won't hurt to discuss this with your doctor.

    All the psychological counseling in the world will not help if you have a chemical imbalance.
  16. May 31, 2004 #15
    I didn't say that I dedicate my life to pleasing my parents. What I was referring to was the fact that my parents (as with anyone's parents) created offspring (me) because they thought it would make them happy. As such, somebody had a purpose for my creation. That says nothing of what I have chosen to do, only what my parents intended.

    All assigned purposes are arbitrary. There's not point in looking. I have no desire to discover any purpose sitting out there waiting for Daniel. I choose to do what I deem desirable or appropriate, without any regard for some magical purpose.
  17. Jun 1, 2004 #16
    @ vertigo :
    no no ! This doesn't annoys me at all. It does sound very clear to me. The example of the playboys is quite good. Why do they chase after girls ? I mean if you are a boy do you wonna be chased all day by some wierd girls... :uhh: Probably most people also see that they behave like fools and get drunk, so they still can act their way, but with a good excuse (eg. " i really hit you ?? nahh. must have been drunk....")

    thx to vertigo and u other guys ^^

    wish ya all a nice life, enjoy it :smile:

    sorry that i missused the forum :wink:
  18. Jun 1, 2004 #17
    You can cry all night about this topic. What is the real purpose of life? TO LIVE for 80 years and then DIE?
  19. Jun 1, 2004 #18
    Really, it's kind of pointless to think that way. It just makes the 80years bland and unproductive. No one knows the real point to life, there probably isn't one...we were probably just some chance lifeform that developed out of the exact right circumstances and conditions. But really...what is the point of viewing life that way? One might as well just be dead.
  20. Jun 1, 2004 #19
    The purpose of life is to be happy, whatever that means for you. If partying all day makes you happy, then so be it. If curing cancer makes you happy, even better. But if you're not happy in your life, why live?
  21. Jun 1, 2004 #20
    Maybe our true purpose is to deny our purposelessness :bugeye:
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