Ridiculous love?

  • Thread starter Lisa!
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  • #26
Danger
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I'll PM you on that. It'll take a while to compose it, though. I'm at work, and it's a busy day.
 
  • #27
Astronuc
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Lisa! said:
Well, you can't have evrything together most of the time! Although I really don't see any problem here since I don't care about having kids and sometimes I think if I'd ever want to have kid, I'd adopt 1.
Ostensibly, that depends on one's partner, in this case the 'right' man. When I met the woman who became my wife, she had decided that she would never marry and never have children. After three months of dating, she changed to definitely getting married and most likely having children.
Lisa! said:
Personally I can think of some reasons why we like having kids, but I like to know others' people's ideas on that as well. So I really appreciate it if you (or anyone else)share their reasons on why they want to have kids with me!
Having children is a very personal matter, particularly for women who must bear the children. Ideally, one wishes to have a child (or children), and hopefully one has a partner who shares that view. My wife and I had children because we 'both' wanted to have children. Children require an enormous commitment.

It doesn't work very well if one of two wants children and the other doesn't or is indifferent.

Similarly, marriage only works if both partners are more or less committed to the relationship.

Regarding the OP.
Is being in relationship with a person that you know he's not your kind and this relationship wouldn't last for so long? I mean you know that person can keep you interested for a short time since he's cute and fun but well, he's not good for life since you have very different plans and values in life and your ideas of life and world are totally different.
To cut te ling story short, what's important in a relationship? Being happy with each other as long as you're together, or relationships should save more important purposes?
Consider maintain a platonic relationship, i.e. friendship, and develop expectations along those lines.

As for what is important in a relationship - mutual respect - from which follows reciprocity.
 
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  • #28
Lisa!
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Hurkyl said:
I think that the potential for the relationship to have a future is very important. If you think that it can't go anywhere, then don't start it. :tongue:
The problem is that I get tired of people very soon and anyway the relationship wouldn't get anywhere. Eh, but how knows? Perhaps that's because I've not met the right person.

If nothing else, it would diminish your chances of getting together with someone with whom you could have a long-term relationship.
Aha! Sometimes I say it couldn't be a bad idea to be with someone for a while in order to get some experiences but then I think of losing the chances. And you know I guess I don't like to be 1 of those people who cheat on their partners as soon as they think they've found a better person since I don't like to be treated that way. Not yet...
Why are you looking at me that way? It could happen! And I am glad I didn't ask out the cute Australian girl who's going home next year. :wink:
hmmm... :wink:
Does that mean you've Mrs right after that?
 
  • #29
Hurkyl
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Lisa! said:
Does that mean you've Mrs right after that?
Maybe! I haven't managed to get an opportunity to ask her out yet, though. :grumpy:
 
  • #30
Moonbear
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I think what you describe in the OP, of a person who is cute and fun to be around, but maybe not long-term relationship material, is what I call a "fling." No harm in having fun together, and sometimes the longer you spend together and get to know each other, the more you grow together and find that a long term relationship can develop. I don't think you ever meet someone on the first day and think they're the person you're going to marry. You get there more gradually.

I think Danger, especially, will appreciate what my step-brother always used to say...he'd settle down and get married when he was too old and slow to catch the attractive women before they ran away, so would have to marry one to keep her. :rofl:
 
  • #31
Danger
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That about sums it up. :frown:
 
  • #32
Lisa!
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Hurkyl said:
Maybe! I haven't managed to get an opportunity to ask her out yet, though. :grumpy:
Come On!

Ah it's really annoying when you guys love someone but you just don't go telling the person straightly. I mean you finally do but sometimes that's too late! Lazy guys...:devil: :grumpy: sometimes it seems you expect the girl to ask you out 1st and when she doesn't well you do it but very late...:biggrin:
 
  • #33
Hurkyl
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I'm not lazy; I wanted to ask her out in person rather than e-mail, but I haven't actually seen her face to face in a while. (and that's not for a lack of trying. :grumpy:)
 
  • #34
Lisa!
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Hurkyl said:
I'm not lazy; I wanted to ask her out in person rather than e-mail, but I haven't actually seen her face to face in a while. (and that's not for a lack of trying. :grumpy:)
:rofl:
Ok ok don't get angry! I hope you see her face to face very soon or try to see her face to face and then ask her out! You guys might not be lazy but girls(at least me) are very impatient...:blushing:


i still think you guys are very lazy. You don't say anything as long as you have the opportunity aand just try to do something when it's more difficult to do something...:uhh:
 
  • #35
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I don't see what the problem is of letting a guy know how you feel...especially if you're that impatient.:wink:It is not always because we are lazy.
 
  • #36
Ask questions in the GIRL TROUBLE thread, people!
 
  • #37
Hurkyl
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But Lisa! doesn't have girl troubles... she is girl trouble! (Sorry, I couldn't resist! :biggrin:)
 
  • #38
honestrosewater
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Lisa! said:
:rofl:
Ok ok don't get angry! I hope you see her face to face very soon or try to see her face to face and then ask her out! You guys might not be lazy but girls(at least me) are very impatient...:blushing:


i still think you guys are very lazy. You don't say anything as long as you have the opportunity aand just try to do something when it's more difficult to do something...:uhh:
Yah, Hurkyl isn't lazy. He just thinks a lot. But like I always say, if you insist on thinking and being rational, you'll be single all of your life.
 
  • #39
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Lisa! said:
Ah it's really annoying when you guys love someone but you just don't go telling the person straightly. I mean you finally do but sometimes that's too late! Lazy guys...:devil: :grumpy: sometimes it seems you expect the girl to ask you out 1st and when she doesn't well you do it but very late...:biggrin:
Lisa, most guys suffer to some extent from fear of rejection. Escalating shows of affection in small steps is the only way to proceed because if a small escalation is rejected then it hurts less than an out and out declaration of love being rejected.

If you like a guy who is proceeding this way with you you can cut through hours and days of misery for both of you by being the first one to make an unmistakable show of strong feelings.
 
  • #40
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honestrosewater said:
YBut like I always say, if you insist on thinking and being rational, you'll be single all of your life.
AMEN!!!!! You are wise beyond your years!
 
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  • #41
Evo
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zoobyshoe said:
If you like a guy who is proceeding this way with you you can cut through hours and days of misery for both of you by being the first one to make an unmistakable show of strong feelings.
Not always. :grumpy: Sometimes they MAKE YOU CRAZY. They run hot and cold so you can never figure out where you stand with them. AAAARGGGGGHHH
 
  • #42
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Well I think that both sexes agree that the other sex needs to make more of an effort to be clear and timely. I just think that it doesn't necessarily have to be the male who makes the first move.
 
  • #43
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Lisa! said:
And if you're in a physics forum and can't understand what's the subject of a thread, you must be in a wrnog place! From now on, off topic posts aren't really welcome since I don't have time to read them...

OH IM SORRY "RELATIONSHIPS", not love... SEMANTICS 4 THE WIN!!!111
 
  • #44
Evo said:
Sometimes they MAKE YOU CRAZY. They run hot and cold so you can never figure out where you stand with them.
But of course, that can be true of anyone, not just one particular type.
 
  • #45
Lisa!
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Moonbear said:
I think what you describe in the OP, of a person who is cute and fun to be around, but maybe not long-term relationship material, is what I call a "fling." No harm in having fun together, and sometimes the longer you spend together and get to know each other, the more you grow together and find that a long term relationship can develop. I don't think you ever meet someone on the first day and think they're the person you're going to marry. You get there more gradually.
Eh, I guess this guy doesn't have the potential to be in long-term relationship with me! The nice thing about him is that he's very cute. I mean he's naughty but polite and he's very easygoing about what I tell him.
well,you know I'm not nice with guys most of the time. I mean I always care about what I'm telling to women since I don't wanna offend them but I just don't know how on earth I get the stupid idea that men don't mind ,no matter how rude you behave towards them!

Wishbone said:
OH IM SORRY "RELATIONSHIPS", not love... SEMANTICS 4 THE WIN!!!111
Nope, that's not the case. I meant I'm not here to learn about love, I just want people to share their experiences with me. well, that's helpful most of the time, although in most cases I prefer to have my own experiences and learn from my own mistakes and experiences...
 

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