Sad Day

That sucks! Tips for sleeping: Couple bottles of [insert favorite drink here].

 

Time heals all wounds. So hang in there; it's just a matter of time.

I know it's hard to believe right now, but these things almost never seem so big in retrospect as they do at the time. Consider that your frame of reference is defective at the moment.

 

when my fiance left me, i spent a lot of time around other guys, because i felt really unwanted, and ugly... so i felt better flirting a bit. other than that, i played guitar a little, drew pictures... just... anything to keep my mind off it.

i also posted a lot on pf, cause i post here a lot when i'm sad.

 

Think of all the negative things she's ever done. Heck, make a list then read it for about 20-30 times a day. That should make it less painful.

 

Sorry to hear that. Nothing really works other than time. But, in the meanwhile, I find doing really strenuous, physical things that require some degree of focus (not too much; you'll be easily distracted, so don't want to start on something that would be dangerous if your mind wandered, but just that you can put all your attention on the task and try to get it off the break-up). You already hit the gym, which is good, but then at home, there's always lots of chores that can be done...even if they don't really need doing...that's a good time to scrub the floors, or get all the windows washed, or dig out that old tree stump that's been waiting to be dug out, or scrub every last bit of burnt on crud off the stove, or clean the bathroom from top to bottom, even all the grout between the tiles, etc. That way, when it's time to go to sleep, you'll just be too physically exhausted to lie awake thinking about her.

 

Breakups that you don't expect are always the hardest. You just feel blind-sided by it on top of everything else, plus it means you still have all the feelings for her that you don't want to be broken up. It's a lot easier when there's a decline in the relationship and you both know it's coming, and just a matter of one person having the guts to speak up and say it's time to call it quits.

That was good of the guys at the gym to pick up a game of basketball with you. They must have been through it themselves to know what you needed.

I guess at work, just resolve to immerse yourself in it as much as you can.

 

I'm sorry man, I broke up with my girl a few weeks ago.

Almost over it by now almost.

Stay happy man.

 

Sorry to hear that Jason. Evo, Moonbear and Ivan pretty much covered it, so I can't really add anything. Keep the chin up.

 

I said write in a paper. That's different from badmouthing her to people which I never recommend. Good luck.

 

I tried a similar technique, didn't really help me much. But if it works for you I guess it's worth a try for anyone.

 

If it's possible, tell people as soon as you get there, that you don't expect to be your usual self today because of the breakup. It'll be easier to get through the day if you don't feel obliged to act like everything's perfectly normal for you.

 

Here's a thread to read that may give some insight in to the thought processes of psycho/mind changing women:

Address:http://www.discussanything.com/forums/showthread.php?t=76909

 

If you're inclined toward fiction writing, this would be the perfect time to get going on a book or short stories. My best writing always came when I was hurting. The only regret that I have about being on the meds now is that I haven't been able to write a word since.
Sorry to hear about it, but you seem to be taking it far better than a lot of people would. Although it might be the first time that you've experienced this, it won't be the last. Every time will be a little harder too, because every time you'll be more convinced that you've found the right partner. In another sense, it will be a little easier because you've had practise at it. Just hang in there.

 

In that case, continue as you are doing and keep the friendship alive. Whatever it is that put you together in the first place is still valid. Just drop the sex part out of the equation and carry on doing non-romantic stuff with her on a casual basis.

 

Start thinking about all the scary things that could have happened to you if you had married her.

BJ