Collection of Science Jokes P2

In summary: Usually it's been commentated as being 'real'. Actually the joke dates back to the 30's and whether it's real or not cannot be said anymore.
  • #386
Stavros Kiri said:
How soft and "micro" was the apple?
Or should I say "How "micro" and soft was the apple?" ? (to be understood better ... :wink:)

[I didn't want to have made it that obvious, ... that's why I flipped the order. (See also davenn's original)]
 
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  • #387
I'm thinking about starting a club, The Black Hole Club, anyone want to join?
We have some rules:
  1. When you approach the club, you must set your watch to tick at a slower rate.
  2. What goes on beyond the event horizon stays beyond the event horizon.
  3. Rule number 3 is you do not talk about what goes on beyond the event horizon.
  4. You must cut off all your hair and we will charge you for this.
  5. You can not leave. If you try, we will disintegrate you into radiation.
Any other rule that may fit the club?
 
  • #388
DennisN said:
Any other rule that may fit the club?

Rules 4 and 5 could be modified to be less intimidating. Mandatory haircuts and the specter of disintegration will not attract prospective members which is what this club is all about.
 
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  • #390
DennisN said:
I'm thinking about starting a club, The Black Hole Club, anyone want to join?
If I would want to invest in your club will I get my interest as black money radiation?
 
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  • #391
It must be a "really dark club"! (society)
I'm afraid to sign up ...
 
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  • #392
8. Our club life lies mostly in the dark. However, from time to time an M&A of our franchises cannot be avoided. This might make some waves in public. Be prepared.
 
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  • #393
zonde said:
If I would want to invest in your club will I get my interest as black money radiation?
You get your money only if it evaporates.
 
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  • #394
DennisN said:
The Black Hole Club
Members must always maintain appearance to the outside worlds as if they're yet to join the club, even though they have long since passed the hazing rituals.
 
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  • #395
mfb said:
...
- Spaghetti is not just a food, it is also the way you will enter the club.

And by what method should we use, to become spaghettified?
hmmmm...
(google google google)

Ah ha!

When entering the club, one must lose one's clothing, becoming singularly naked, and don some ramen type clothing. Available at amazon.com for between $29.99 & $34.99, USD.

If entering the club with someone else, you must argue incessantly regarding noodle/pasta/ramen/spaghetti quadrality, where they are all the same thing at once, but can be viewed differently, depending on which culinary experiment one is going to feast upon, once you've had time, if and only if time actually exists in the club, after looking at the menu.
 
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  • #397
I just started swimming, so if there's no swimming in the club ... no way!
 
  • #399
mfb said:
e.g. "Swimming in Spacetime: Motion by Cyclic Changes in Body Shape"

Count me in! Ou yeah! ... count me in!
It's an opportunity to also learn how to swim in dark ... and in fierce gravity.
Any known black hole as a canditate for the premises?
 
  • #400
upload_2017-5-14_19-9-22.png
 
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  • #402
What do you call a single person from Krakow who sticks to refrigerators?

Magnetic monopole.
 
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  • #403
hahahaI guessed as to where Krakow probably was, but had to google to be sure :wink:
 
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  • #404
kuruman said:
What do you call a single person from Krakow who sticks to refrigerators?
There's a kind of sausage here named "Krakower" (transscripted). No wonder I couldn't solve the riddle.
 
  • #405
davenn said:
I guessed as to where Krakow probably was, but had to google to be sure :wink:
For your horrible, horrible crime of ignorance I offer an invitation. Should you ever visit Krakow, I'll be happy to show you around.
 
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  • #406
2 guys "from Krakow" (or can say it with 2 blondes - no offense to either ...)
Sitting in a cafeteria, against the mirror, on the other side:

"Look look! Two guys just like us, over there. Let's go meet them!"
[Standing up ...] ... [Pause]
"Ok, never mind, they're coming here! ..."
[Sitting down]
 
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  • #407
Bandersnatch said:
For your horrible, horrible crime of ignorance I offer an invitation. Should you ever visit Krakow, I'll be happy to show you around.

thanks mate :smile:
 
  • #408
CERN giftshop.jpg
 
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  • #409
demolishing physics lab.jpg
 
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  • #410
science-physics-physicists-particles-atoms-particle_physicist-tmcn3636_low.jpg
 
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  • #411
18485740_2043516495736043_8847127807421295201_n.jpg
 
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  • #412
If the Earth is flat, so could be the moon. Look at it!
 
  • #413
Stavros Kiri said:
If the Earth is flat, so could be the moon. Look at it!

ahhhh but the libration wobble of it proves otherwise :wink:
 
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  • #414
davenn said:
ahhhh but the libration wobble of it proves otherwise
Besides which I think there are no cats on the Moon to worry about.
 
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  • #415
kuruman said:
Besides which I think there are no cats on the Moon to worry about.

but there are dogs ... apparently ... :wink:

dog on the moon.gif
 
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  • #416
kuruman said:
Besides which I think there are no cats on the Moon to worry about.
And nobody shall say there hasn't been searched for: Max, the mooncat.
 
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  • #419
kuruman said:
Clear evidence that the chicken got there before the eggs.
... and that their reputation is completely false: It takes braveness "to bear with unbearable sorrow, to run where the brave dare not go".
 
  • #420
davenn said:
but there are dogs ... apparently ... :wink:
He was searching for a black monolith, but he ended up finding a wormhole:
tumblr_mnuuhgHyFi1rdrdqlo1_400.gif
 
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