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Should I Be Ashamed?

  1. Sep 19, 2012 #1
    When I recieved my report card in the summer I got a 71 in physics (avg 73), I was devastated because I tried so hard to get above the 80. That 71 was responsible for me not enjoying my prom, it might also of been responsible for one of my classmates not inviting to his party even though I have yet to confirm it was because me. I am wondering if I deserved it since in the first and second term (excluding the final theory exam) I did not study for tests and was influenced by the same classmate to do so because he said he did not study for them. My results were bad and his results were good.

    In the third term I studied for tests using online resources because I could do problem sets with answers. I should of done the ones in the textbook since that was the guide, but it did not have the answers even though I would of had to ask my teacher for them enevitably. Anyways I ended up with better grades on tests.

    My lab reports were good throughout the first and second term but were bad in the third term because of some bad teaching methods like for example not giving the class the mathematical def of a regression line and instead just telling me and them to guess the regression line or line of best fit as she calls it

    Anyways should I be ashamed of myself because I did not study for all the tests?
  2. jcsd
  3. Sep 19, 2012 #2
    Obviously you shouldn't be ashamed (like we're gonna tell you to be ashamed... --__--). That being said, it sounds like you're blaming a lot of different things. I hate to say it, but I doubt that having a bad prom (my junior year in high school I had a weak prom also, so I can relate) had a substantial effect on your grades. A friend of yours not inviting you to his party? Lol come on man, that stuff happens to people all the time. A lot of professionals couldn't care less about what a lot of people would consider to be good excuses (stuff like people being sick for a while, parents dying, etc.), so saying that your friend didn't invite you to a party would probably get a few laughs. Just don't sweat it. Learn from your mistakes and move on. You clearly just needed to study more.
  4. Sep 19, 2012 #3
    I think the OP meant the bad score caused him to not enjoy prom/not get invited to his friend's party?

    To the OP - don't dwell on it so much that it makes you miserable, learn from your mistakes and figure out what you could do better from now on. And yeah, study for those exams :-)

    But, do take personal responsibility. If you didn't study cos some guy said he doesn't study, well I am afraid it's still on you to take responsibility for your test score. After all, YOU made the decision to take this guys advice.
  5. Sep 19, 2012 #4
    Touche haha I stand corrected.
  6. Sep 19, 2012 #5
    I'll go in the other direction... yes, you deserved it and yes, you should be ashamed. Not sackcloth-and-ashes ashamed, but you could have done better if you had put in the effort, and you should be ashamed you didn't put in the effort.

    Be ashamed enough that this doesn't happen again. :smile:
  7. Oct 2, 2012 #6
    I am going to conclude by saying that some of it was my teacher's fault, I hope university will not have teachers who give the wrong definition to their students and expect not to be fired
  8. Oct 2, 2012 #7
    Don't blame this on your teacher. A wrong definition won't bring you from an 80 to a 72. You probably would have caught that mistake if you knew what you were doing. Take some responsibility.
  9. Oct 2, 2012 #8
    From your posts on this thread, I can see that you try too hard to find things to blame. Take responsibility.

    I think what you meant to blame is depression and not specifically the fact that you didn't have a good prom (I didn't even have a prom and it didn't affect me, although it was my decision). If you feel depressed then you should definitely go to the a psychologist/psychiatrists, depressions can and will suck all of the motivation out of you. Some people have a propensity for depression due to their neural anatomy, so if you feel that you are often depressed then its worth checking out as well.
  10. Oct 2, 2012 #9
    Heh. Let me explain something to you now... your teachers in high school care deeply about your learning. Professors in college care deeply about their research.

    If you ask for help, the vast majority of professors will give it gladly. But if you don't put in the effort, they will let you sink like a stone and not think twice about it.

    As for being fired... untenured professors are fired for not publishing enough, and tenured professors are fired for borderline criminal activity. And that's about it.
  11. Oct 3, 2012 #10
    Yes you should be ashamed. You did not try hard and now you are here trying to blame things on others instead of taking the responsibility yourself. And couldn't enjoy your prom? Well, i could tell you, if you keep this irreponsible attitude, you are probably going to have a lot of failures in your life. When that happens, not enjoying your prom is no longer a big deal.
  12. Oct 6, 2012 #11
    The point I am making is that not all of it is my fault. I can not help myself if the teacher does not give an accurate definition of a math concept. In university I am confident that the teachers will know better. I did try really hard in the third term to make up for my mistakes but I guess that did not pay off the way I hoped.
    Last edited: Oct 6, 2012
  13. Oct 6, 2012 #12


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    Lesson in Life 101: You will have more bad teachers, bad bosses, bad environments, and regardless of all of this will still be expected to do well. If anyone else in your class did better than you, then you know it's possible to do better and thus your failure is your own fault and not anyone elses.

    It's as simple as that.
  14. Oct 6, 2012 #13
    How is it someone's fault if the teacher for example does not give the right definition? or chooses to not reschedule a test because of another exam?. If I had a bad boss I would leave my post.
  15. Oct 6, 2012 #14


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    Education Advisor

    In my college life, professors have said wrong things, given wrong formulas, and even wrong answers. Thankfully due to my habit of self-studying and verifying information given to me, most if not all these errors were found quickly enough.

    In my military life, I've been given bad grids, bad assessments, wrong intel, and heck once a broken 50 cal (bad day), still the mission got done.

    Excuses, no one cares for them, and your boss would be glad to have you leave if you make it a habit to offer them. So i'll state it again, motivate yourself, learn from your mistake and drive on with the mission, it's that simple.
  16. Oct 7, 2012 #15
    You learned a lesson here. Do not rely only on teachers for your course. Be sure to self-study and research concepts on your own (the internet is a great help for that). Later in college, you're going to have awesome teachers and very bad teachers who don't care at all for the class and who say wrong things all the time. You are expected to know the material nonetheless.
  17. Oct 7, 2012 #16
    To the OP: This is some good advice, man. I'd take it, if I were you.

    Also, and I know this *all* too well: you can't even rely on experts to be right all the time (read: even instructors who care about their craft deeply will mess up once in a while). If you want to be sure you know the material, *you're* going to have to do the legwork and research it yourself. There are no shortcuts. If you aren't willing to do the legwork, you shouldn't be beating yourself up about it, you should be changing your situation or getting out of the game. The world doesn't have the time or inclination to care for you--so you're gonna have to.

    I hope that doesn't offend you, but even if it does, maybe it will spur you to do better in the future.

    Best regards,

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