Story time

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  • #126
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with a dash of salt. He's mean.
 
  • #127
Moonbear
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Then there's his brother, Chip...
 
  • #128
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Moonbear said:
Then there's his brother, Chip...
chip was as dumb as his brother was mean.
 
  • #129
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He wandered into a kindergarten...
 
  • #130
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class of beavers, who quickly
 
  • #131
Moonbear
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built a model dam with...
 
  • #132
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most of Chip's mom's side of the family
 
  • #133
Moonbear
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and some frozen brocolli. By...
 
  • #134
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the way, whatever happened to
 
  • #135
Moonbear
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Ivan after that horrible incident...
 
  • #136
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involving his mouse clicking finger and the
 
  • #137
Moonbear
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splinter? Where were we? Right...
 
  • #138
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BEHIND YOU! screamed the casual observer.
 
  • #139
and behold! there he saw....
 
  • #140
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the artist formerly known as
 
  • #141
Mr. T. He was in a...
 
  • #142
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bad story written 5 words at a time
 
  • #143
plover
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saying, "I pity the fools, who"
 
  • #144
Math Is Hard
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said my mama was so fat she..
 
  • #145
had to arrange a crane...
 
  • #146
plover
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could only type 5 words before...
 
  • #147
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plover said:
could only type 5 words before...
asking, "what about my mama?"
 
  • #148
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I feel we are probably ready to publish. Who wants to go back and compile everything. I know I'm not going to, I haven't even read pages 3-7.
 
  • #149
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Here is my barely edited compilation, the first few paragraphs were already compiled by Ethereal on the bottom of page 4, so I just continued from his/her start.

Compilation:

At the brink of night, just out of sight, was a stranger in fright. I ran outside to investigate. That's when I heard the lady next door yell "What are you doing?!" So I told her, "I am searching for the golden apron of fortitude. This Apron when electrified, can turn soil and rocks into peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, wheat, rice corn, oats and morph into a 300 pound purple people-eater that likes to sing children songs and dance on green tomatoes. All the frolick like an elf while using humans like toothpicks.

He pokes people with toothpicks while strapping on his nuclear-powered aluminium foil deflector beanie, which was given by that girl to protect him from the feeling of loneliness, he felt since the nuclear powered beanie made him sterile, so he went to Tadpoles-R-Us where he was injected with a nuff tadpoles to fill..."Wait!", he yelled, "What are you doing with that really long...what the!?!!"

Next Elvis walked in with a red cape on. He grabbed the purple people-eater, the long what the!?!!, and the keys to the limo. Meanwhile, across town the armadilo and kangaroo swaggered into the local kangaroo/armadilo bar. But before they had a chance to order, they broke the 5-word limit, incurring the wrath of the word limit deities that spit martini. However, this time they had rum instead of gin and visited the underworld where they saw a sticky slimy bob thingy. Or rather, a slime Bob secreted was found bubbling moodily near a ravenous alien.

Waiting for the intergalactic bus to the Radnuxean Galaxy, where jellyfish are purple, was a drunken bum of priceless proportions. His name was something like Joak the Bloke of Eritrea, who Ate a Pea a Day.

The limo pulled up. Joak pulled out his laptop and showed it to Elvis, who was quite stoned. The monitor displayed the site, "Physics Forums" but it all looked Greek to the young man eating and the girl sucking a rather long line of complaining people who were waiting to get under the man's body because he had a really big snot hanging from his "Eeew! That's disgusting," the girl said. This caused the man to redefine his existing concepts of physics so that he can acquire a better understanding of working of his laptop. This new knowledge led him to publish the theory of special education, for the benefit of those who need to be special.

Meanwhile, back in line was this crazy lookin' yardstick. It had three feet of pure love. One woman who walked too close to a black hole and was falling down, when suddenly Einstein and Hawkings popped out of the black hole and touched the girl's frisky jibbly bits, and she slapped him squarely across the posturing posterior post-haste, possibly passively pestering post-humous pedantics partaking of her pensive personality. "Perplexing," she puzzled. "Where's that purple people eater?" "And why not eat me?" 'Its actually in chemistry Lab Eating silver nitrate poisoned people for supper", said the nutty mad scientist who loves to get sucked his long, curved, silken-skinned toothbrush he only uses for wiping his hairy, dirty toe nails that are objects of delight for sprinkles on a cake, which happens to be oozing with voluptuous mounds of mocha mousse seeming to tempt the mad scientist to exfoliate. Instead, he ran. So, he bounced right onto the Bubbling experiment.

Meanwhile, the toothbrush sat unused, languishing from not realizing its full potential. The Mad Scientist thought, "wait a minute, a toothbrush has the right to a fullfilling existence too!!!!!!" and so picked up the depressed toothbrush, and took it downtown to the drugstore hoping to find it a pink toothbrush to boogie with. Having done this the resulting litter of toothpicks began their dangerous march towards a life of toothpaste abuse and 2nd grade arts & crafts.

The runt of the litter, "Call me, Sliver," was the meanest; He'll give you a splinter with a dash of salt. He's mean. Then there's his brother, Chip. Chip was as dumb as his brother was mean. He wandered into a kindergarten class of beavers, who quickly built a model dam with most of Chip's mom's side of the family and some frozen brocolli.

By the way, whatever happened to Ivan after that horrible incident involving his mouse clicking finger and the splinter? Where were we? “Right BEHIND YOU,” screamed the casual observer. And behold there he saw the artist formerly known as Mr. T. He was in a bad story written 5 words at a time saying, "I pity the fools, who" said my mama was so fat she had to arrange a crane could only type 5 words before asking, "what about my mama?"
 
  • #150
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I'm amazed.
What a rotten piece of crap.
 

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