Stupid cheese

  • #1
Math Is Hard
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I bought some cheese curds last week - so called "squeaky cheese". What a rip-off. They don't squeak or make any noise at all.
 

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  • #2
Chi Meson
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Um, you need to eat them. If you stare at them, they just sit there. Silently.
 
  • #3
Math Is Hard
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Um, you need to eat them. If you stare at them, they just sit there. Silently.

oh, you are veddy, veddy funny!

I did eat them. Not a single one cried out in pain. :grumpy:
 
  • #4
lisab
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Try chewing reeeeeeeeeal slooooooow.

If the curds still don't squeal, take it back to the store! "My cheese is completely silent! You sold me mute cheese!"
 
  • #5
Moridin
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Kind of like the Big Bang theory. Not very big, nor very loud. What a rip-off indeed.
 
  • #6
Kurdt
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'Ello, I wish to register a complaint about this cheese I purchased from this very boutique not half an hour ago.
 
  • #7
Evo
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Oooh, what is "squeeky cheese"?
 
  • #8
Math Is Hard
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ok, chewing sloooowly. nope. still quiet. I think these curds are definitely defective.

Or maybe they just sold me plain old wads of cheese hoping I would be suggestible enough to "hear" squeaking.
 
  • #9
Math Is Hard
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Oooh, what is "squeeky cheese"?

http://www.squeakycheese.com/docs/aboutcurd.htm

Squeakycheese (cheese curd) is fresh, young cheddar cheese in the natural, random shape and form before being processed into blocks and aged. (Cheddar cheese is typically aged from 60 days to 4 years before being sold.) It's most amazing quality of course is that it squeaks when it's eaten. SqueakyCheese is it's very best at room temperature or even slightly warmed. Unlike the aged variety of Cheddar, curds lose their desirable qualities if refrigerated or stored for a long period of time (the squeak disappears and they turn dry and salty). This means that even if you can find them in ordinary supermarkets, they are probably a few weeks old, and will have lost their incredible taste. But the freshly made and rush shipped cheese curds from squeakycheese.com still have their moist squeaky properties.

I wonder if they were refrigerated too long.
 
  • #12
GeorginaS
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Maybe just not fresh, MIH, because, yes, fresh curds squeak against your teeth when you eat them. Plus, they have amazing flavour!
 
  • #13
lisab
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Maybe it's shy cheese. After a while, it'll start to relax, once it gets to know you better. Then it'll start to squeak. It will sqeak more and more and more...pretty soon you won't be able to shut it up!!
 
  • #14
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"wensleydale?"
"yes sir!"
:rofl:
 
  • #15
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That's delightful!

Maybe just not fresh, MIH, because, yes, fresh curds squeak against your teeth when you eat them. Plus, they have amazing flavour!

I'm so disappointed.

Maybe it's shy cheese. After a while, it'll start to relax, once it gets to know you better. Then it'll start to squeak. It will sqeak more and more and more...pretty soon you won't be able to shut it up!!

"Hello, I'd like to return this cheese."
"what's the problem?"
"It's very shy."
"What sort of wine did you have with it?"
"Wine? No wine."
"Well, there's your problem. One always drinks wine with cheese. Helps the cheese relax."
 
  • #16
lisab
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"Hello, I'd like to return this cheese."
"what's the problem?"
"It's very shy."
"What sort of wine did you have with it?"
"Wine? No wine."
"Well, there's your problem. One always drinks wine with cheese. Helps the cheese relax."


:rofl:

MIH, just don't give it tequila, whatever you do!!
 
  • #17
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:rofl:

MIH, just don't give it tequila, whatever you do!!

:bugeye:

That would explain those "Cheese Gone Wild" videos.
 
  • #18
rewebster
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I bought some cheese curds last week - so called "squeaky cheese". What a rip-off. They don't squeak or make any noise at all.

Don't buy 'cottage' cheese then---I don't think you'll be happy with it either
 
  • #19
Gokul43201
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'Ello, I wish to register a complaint about this cheese I purchased from this very boutique not half an hour ago.
Ah yes, the squeeky bleu! Well, what's wrong with it?
 
  • #20
JasonRox
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I'm not a fan of squeaky cheese. They're is a fast food place here in Quebec where they put it on the poutines.
 
  • #21
DaveC426913
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I shall play my drum for the baby cheeses.
 
  • #22
Ouabache
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'Ello, I wish to register a complaint about this cheese I purchased from this very boutique not half an hour ago.
shades of a dead parrot? :smile:
 
  • #23
Gokul43201
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shades of a dead parrot? :smile:
There goes my conversation...:frown:

Oh well...I was, uh, sitting in the public library on Thurmon Street just now, skimming through Rogue Herrys by Hugh Walpole, and I suddenly came over all peckish. And I thought to myself, "a little fermented curd will do the trick," so, I curtailed my Walpoling activites, sallied forth, and infiltrated your place of purveyance to negotiate the vending of some cheesy comestibles!
 
  • #24
phyzmatix
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:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:
 
  • #25
Tsu
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In Wisconsin, we would warm up a couple of bags of curds to room temperature, sprinkle a little bit of salt on them and eat them along with some smoked chubs and summer sausage with crackers washed down with a cold Old Milwaukee (or 3) during a Packer game. YUM!!! :biggrin:
 
  • #26
Chi Meson
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When living in Portland, OR, we lived on Tilamook cheddar. Whenever taking a trip to the coast we would pass the Tilamook factory and help ourselves to the free curd left out in a big bowl.

In retrospect, probably not very sanitary, but we would be so hungry by then after Kayaking through the kelp forests, or whatever we did that day.
 
  • #27
Math Is Hard
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I'm not a fan of squeaky cheese. They're is a fast food place here in Quebec where they put it on the poutines.

They put it on their chests?
 

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