Math Is Hard
I bought some cheese curds last week - so called "squeaky cheese". What a rip-off. They don't squeak or make any noise at all.
Oooh, what is "squeeky cheese"?
Squeakycheese (cheese curd) is fresh, young cheddar cheese in the natural, random shape and form before being processed into blocks and aged. (Cheddar cheese is typically aged from 60 days to 4 years before being sold.) It's most amazing quality of course is that it squeaks when it's eaten. SqueakyCheese is it's very best at room temperature or even slightly warmed. Unlike the aged variety of Cheddar, curds lose their desirable qualities if refrigerated or stored for a long period of time (the squeak disappears and they turn dry and salty). This means that even if you can find them in ordinary supermarkets, they are probably a few weeks old, and will have lost their incredible taste. But the freshly made and rush shipped cheese curds from squeakycheese.com still have their moist squeaky properties.
Maybe just not fresh, MIH, because, yes, fresh curds squeak against your teeth when you eat them. Plus, they have amazing flavour!
Maybe it's shy cheese. After a while, it'll start to relax, once it gets to know you better. Then it'll start to squeak. It will sqeak more and more and more...pretty soon you won't be able to shut it up!!
"Hello, I'd like to return this cheese."
"what's the problem?"
"It's very shy."
"What sort of wine did you have with it?"
"Wine? No wine."
"Well, there's your problem. One always drinks wine with cheese. Helps the cheese relax."
There goes my conversation...shades of a dead parrot?