Dismiss Notice
Join Physics Forums Today!
The friendliest, high quality science and math community on the planet! Everyone who loves science is here!

The Game by Neil Strauss?

  1. Mar 31, 2013 #1
    "The Game" by Neil Strauss?

    Has anyone here read "The Game" by Neil Strauss? In the book, Neil Strauss writes how he went from a nerd to a world-class pick-up artist. I read the first 2/3s of it, after that it's just drama and whining. Read wikipedia for more information.

    Initially I was sceptical of this "how to pick up girls" stuff, I'm a student of science after-all, but the more of the "tricks" I read, the more I was convinced it was just common sense. For the most part, the main schools advocate ordinary stuff like confidence, be unique, be funny, try to surprise etc. Stuff I already knew about charming girls. What I like though, is how everything is organized in several relatively scientific systems for pick-up called "theories", and how it provides tactics, basic psychology, pick-up material and examples of how it is used.

    That said, there also are several shady and morally controversial theories, like using hypnosis to trick girls, or shady guys trying to suck money out of desperate men.

    Anyway, opinions? Imo, it's good to have a more structured and in-depth alternative to the typical "be yourself" or "just be nice" etc. advice given out around here. To me, reading this stuff is almost like when I read physics. I can't wait to try this stuff out next weekend.
     
    Last edited: Mar 31, 2013
  2. jcsd
  3. Mar 31, 2013 #2

    Evo

    User Avatar

    Staff: Mentor

    I don't like phony people, so I say "be yourself" and "just be nice" because if you pretend to be something you're not, you'll get dumped as soon as the other person realizes you're not what you pretended to be.
     
  4. Mar 31, 2013 #3
    Why is improving ones social skills and being oneself mutually exclusive?
     
  5. Mar 31, 2013 #4

    WannabeNewton

    User Avatar
    Science Advisor

    I've read the game and I've seen Strauss's videos as well. It really is common sense on some level. You're just taking advantage of positive responses to social cues; it is all well structured if you can execute it correctly. There was also a game show related to the game: look up "Keys to the VIP" on youtube. In particular, watch the episode with the contestant Cajun. That man is a pick up god.
     
  6. Mar 31, 2013 #5
    I got this book as a gift. I only skimmed through some of it, but I'm morally disgusted by its premise: acting like something you're not (basically if you don't fit the model alpha male the book describes).

    As much as I dislike being the ignored nice guy, I have enough psychological distresses to put on a fake persona 24/7. I'd rather preserve my sanity. I wouldn't want to be with anyone that would fall victim to the book's trickery either, they'd have to be pretty dimwitted to not see its all a trick.
     
  7. Mar 31, 2013 #6
    This "alpha" has nothing to do with being a douchebag or tricking people like you think, it's primarily about having confidence (having, not pretending). And I see no reason why somebody can't build confidence through social interaction.. It sure worked for me, at least.

    This book isn't exactly a guide, but you should give it a chance and read it properly,, then you'll find out these pick-up people are as morally diverse as any other community.

    Wannabenewton: yeh, I'll check it out later. I got waay too much time on my hands right now. :P
     
  8. Apr 1, 2013 #7
    Well said!!!! I couldn't finish the book. My friend gave it to me so he would have someone to sarge with. He is a good guy and I think he got wrapped up in the idea of it. Just one of those phases he went through I guess. Glad he is out of it now.
     
  9. Apr 1, 2013 #8

    jedishrfu

    Staff: Mentor

    This reminds me of the old comedy movie about how a wife used a book on poodles to train her husband until he found out.

    It starred Bobby Darin and Sandra Dee and was called If A Man Answers.

    http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0056093/
     
  10. Apr 2, 2013 #9
    Pick-up Artists? More like Pick-up incurable STDs.

    You dont actually have the game, even if you use the game, until and unless you know some more secret stuffs. ;)
     
  11. Apr 3, 2013 #10

    kith

    User Avatar
    Science Advisor

    I haven't read the book, so my opinion is based on internet hearsay.

    I don't think that adopting such an attitude towards women "improves one's social skills". Quite the contrary, I would say it weakens your ability to have deep relationships with other people. The problem is not that the book teaches you how to get self confidence. The problem is that it does so by telling you to treat others like things where you just have to push the right buttons to get a desired reaction. That's the opposite of love which is based on genuine interest in the other as a person.
     
  12. Apr 3, 2013 #11
    I would like to add: the person that recommended and gave me this book used to pride himself with being a pickup artist, but now he's in his mid 30's wanting to settle like the rest of his friends and is unable to attract marriage material because -according to him- he gives off the bad-boy image. The "best" he's found lately was someone who cheated on her husband with him.

    If all you're looking to do is sleep with as many people as possible then yeah the book is probably what you want. The book is obviously written in a fashion that appeals to sciencey-minded people, which was one of the selling points when it was recommended to me.
     
    Last edited: Apr 3, 2013
  13. Apr 3, 2013 #12

    jim hardy

    User Avatar
    Science Advisor
    Gold Member
    2016 Award

    There's a lot of wisdom in Country Music.

     
    Last edited by a moderator: Sep 25, 2014
  14. Apr 3, 2013 #13

    jedishrfu

    Staff: Mentor

    Great song! It's on YouTube:

     
    Last edited by a moderator: Sep 25, 2014
  15. Apr 4, 2013 #14
    Okay, if one adopts "the game" as ones religion, then sure the women around you gets dehumanized. But how is this different from, say, a psychologist who becomes so obsessed with his science he/she starts seeing humans as relatively predictable machines?

    I think this pick-up stuff has many useful & non-controversial tips, strategies and tricks, and I think these can be used without becoming ensnared by it.
     
  16. Apr 4, 2013 #15

    Evo

    User Avatar

    Staff: Mentor

    Well, if your goal is to see how many women you can trick into a one night stand, go for it. Seems rather pathetic to me.
     
  17. Apr 4, 2013 #16

    CompuChip

    User Avatar
    Science Advisor
    Homework Helper

    I also read the first 2/3 or so of the book (without breaking any forum rules, let's describe it as a digital gift). Initially I was also somewhat put off by the clinical and methodical process that it advocates, but after a while I started noticing that some people naturally practice some of the things in the book. In fact, I would have sworn one friend of mine was playing "the game", though he himself denied it and just said he tried to be more social and less inhibited by self-imposed fears and restrictions, or something like that.

    Now, a few years after reading the book, I think that it is quite useful in that it makes you aware of many things that may go unnoticed. Not feeling restrained to approach people, involving everyone in a group - the whole "social proof" thing, little "tricks" to make social interactions more attractive; all these things are not only useful when you try to pickup as many girls as possible, but also in everyday social life: when waiting at the bus stop, when walking into a bar, when you meet up with some close friends and find yourself drawn in a big group of, erm, acquaintances ... being aware of your attitude and behaviour and making slight changes can just make social interactions go more smoothly without making you fake or "not be yourself", and being unaware of them you may often find yourself silently crept away in a corner.

    So in short, I think the book is nonsense and maybe even not the last part but basically all of it was whining; but as with all extremes there are useful lessons to be learnt.
     
  18. Apr 4, 2013 #17

    jim hardy

    User Avatar
    Science Advisor
    Gold Member
    2016 Award

    Well I looked at Wikipedia.
    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Neil_Strauss
    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Seduction_community
    I've not read the book.
    Based on the wiki articles he's selling sex, just as Hugh Heffner sold it to mine. I blame HH's rationalization of hedonism for a lot of present day society's excesses and ails.


    I hope your generation fares better.
     
    Last edited: Apr 4, 2013
  19. Apr 4, 2013 #18

    WannabeNewton

    User Avatar
    Science Advisor

    Boy do I have bad news for you :wink:
     
  20. Apr 8, 2013 #19
    Hey Nikitin. Go for it, man. I'm with you. Ignore the shaming. Do it just for the game's sake. A kind of challenge. Don't forget to tell me some of your stories. I'll be rather happy if you successfully pis off some of the prudes.
     
  21. Apr 8, 2013 #20
    Bizarrely, Neil Strauss was in my North Korea tour group two years ago. With him was a very attractive girl from Ukraine. From my talks with him, his techniques do generally work. They will likely land you a girlfriend, however from my perspective they will rarely land you a meaningful long term relationship. Why? Simply because his goals are too much like hunting and finding that trophy rather than finding a soul mate organically.
     
Know someone interested in this topic? Share this thread via Reddit, Google+, Twitter, or Facebook




Similar Discussions: The Game by Neil Strauss?
  1. That game (Replies: 16)

  2. Physics games (Replies: 35)

  3. RIP Neil Armstrong (Replies: 21)

Loading...