Well, this is not really a theory exercise--->just two versions of a piece I've just received from my buddies, and I'm trying to find out which version is better. As clarity seems to be an issue, I post a clearer image soon...rachmaninoff2 said:M. 3-4 transition in the second example is nonsense. The diminshed triad in the first example is merely awkward, and painful, much more so with the unnecessary Bb suspension. If this is a theory exercise (as I hope), lots of things to things to be improved might be
-use readable notation (bass clef for RH)
-look up, in your text, a half-decent transition from IV(64) to I, there are many
-figure out what your rests mean, and why they make everything more awkward
(hint: 1st downbeat is the strongest beat)
That still doesn't work; IV-iv is very questionable harmonically... and in this case the notes are exactly repeated.bomba923 said:(Well...I'll change their F# to a Gb...
The dotted rests are correct as they are - changing that would decrease readability. The questionable rests are in the upper staff, looking at the apparent melodic structure - apparently the strong beats are all silent! :zzz: If they're looking at the Bb as melodic, even worse - you have a melodic structure that looks like "Bb - Bb - Bb - Bb - Bb".and those "toted quarter rests" will be replaced with separate quarter and eighth rests. Also, I'll transpose the RH to work with a bass clef)