Whats your favorite quote?
"Whats your favorite quote?", credited to Zygotic Embryo, although I'm not convinced he is the true originator.
There's no substitute for being there, so...
"Everything's fine. We're just... losing altitude rapidly!", as shouted by myself just as it looked like we were all going to die. Every eye turned to the compartment from which the oxygen masks were expected to drop, but with complete disregard for comic timing, they alas did not.
"Sorry, I haven't got the hang of this thing yet," quoted from a woman in an electric wheelchair who had not had the foresight to reverse into the elevator first, so was attempting a three point turn in a tight, crowded space and kept reversing into my friend's leg, over and over and...
"Let go of the button," the same woman, some days later, as she managed to beat the closing elevator doors by a split second but, thanks to there inexplicably being a meddling child on the front of her wheelchair this time, did not manage to slow down before she hit glass wall at the other side with an almighty thunk!
"Who's this f------ FREAK?!?", my afore-mentioned friend, wildly enraged by a man who had the audacity to be standing in front of him in the aisle of a plane, who then redoubled his efforts to get his carry-ons into the overhead luggage compartment. I felt sorry for him. He looked like he was going to cry. He had a little yellow badge on his sweater saying "Hi. My name is...." something. No-one with a badge like that is equipped to deal with that kind of situation.
Personal favorite: "JESUS!!!" This utter gem of a line was memorably screamed by an air stewardess on the same plane moments later, a plane which the pilot decided to get off the ground without all the usual warnings to staff to safely take their seats. That momentary loss of all professionalism will stay with me til the grave, and made her officially my favorite person of all time. The fastest I've ever seen ANYONE move in high-heels, though she was greatly aided by her inertia.
Not many famous ones, but famous people are just over-rated.
i have a couple of new favorites:
I nearly shat myself - Brewnog
I've run across this expression before, but Brewnog threw this out with such casual familiarity that it really struck me as funny! I laughed so hard I nearly shat myself
While talking with a very old friend the other night, he expressed his sense of frustration at the lack of progress made wrt certain forms mental deterioration found mostly in the elderly. "You would think that they'd understand the brain better by now", he complained. "They've had one to work with for quite awhile now!"
Unfortunately, mine are all from those over-rated famous people:
A little learning is a dangerous thing;
Drink deep, or taste not the Pierian spring:
There shallow draughts intoxicate the brain,
And drinking largely sobers us again.
Now my own suspicion is that the Universe is not only queerer than we suppose, but queerer than we can suppose.
J. B. S. Haldane
Not many appreciate the ultimate power and potential usefulness of basic knowledge accumulated by obscure, unseen investigators who, in a lifetime of intensive study, may never see any practical use for their findings but who go on seeking answers to the unknown without thought of financial or practical gain.
Individual science fiction stories may seem as trivial as ever to the blinder critics and philosophers of today - but the core of science fiction, its essence . . . has become crucial to our salvation if we are to be saved at all.
Question with boldness even the existence of a God; because, if there be one, he must more approve of the homage of reason, than that of blind-folded fear.
Man is a credulous animal, and must believe something; in the absence of good grounds for belief, he will be satisfied with bad ones.
Those who forget good and evil and seek only to know the facts are more likely to achieve good than those who view the world through the distorting medium of their own desires.
The following are excerpts from The Notebooks of Lazarus Long by Robert A. Heinlein:
A zygote is a gamete's way of producing more gametes. This may be the purpose of the universe.
Democracy is based on the assumption that a million men are wiser than one man. How's that again? I missed something.
Autocracy is based on the assumption that one man is wiser than a million men. Let's play that over again too. Who decides?
What are the facts? again and again and again - what are the facts. Shun wishful thinking, ignore divine revelation, forget what "the stars foretell", avoid opinion, care not what he neighbors think, never mind the unguessable "verdict of history" - what are the facts, and to how many decimal places? You pilot always into an unknown future; facts are your single clue. Get the facts!
Anyone who cannot cope with mathematics is not fully human. At best he is a tolerable subhuman who has learned to tie his shoes, bathe, and not make messes in the house.
A human being should be able to change a diaper, plan an invasion, butcher a hog, conn a ship, design a building, write a sonnet, balance accounts, build a wall, set a bone, comfort the dying, take orders, give orders, cooperate, act alone, solve equations, analyze a new problem, pitch manure, program a computer, cook a tasty meal, fight efficiently, die gallantly. Specialization is for insects.
One man's "magic" is another man's engineering. "Supernatural" is a null word.
The difference between science and the fuzzy subjects is that science requires reasoning, while those other subjects merely require scholarship.
Minimize your therbligs until it becomes automatic; this doubles your effective lifetime - and thereby gives time to enjoy butterflies and kittens and rainbows.
Expertise in one field does not carry over into other fields. but experts often think so. the narrower their field of knowledge the more likely they are to think so.
Tilting at windmills hurts you more that the windmill.
Natural laws have no pity.
If "everybody knows" such and such, then it ain't so, by at least ten thousand to one.
Climate is what we expect, weather is what we get.
this one, because it's spelled wrong
I really don't have a favorite quote though....
I knew there was a connection!
"Frankly my dear i don't give a damn!"
By that guy from that film.
OMG lotsa quotes
"I think any visit by aliens would be very obvious and probably very unpleasant like in the movie 'Independance Day' " - Stephen Hawking
“I think computer viruses should count as life. I think it says something about human nature that the only form of life we have created so far is purely destructive. We've created life in our own image.” – Stephen Hawking
“We are just an advanced breed of monkeys on a minor planet of a very average star. But we can understand the Universe. That makes us something very special.” – Stephen Hawking
“It is of interest to note that while some dolphins are reported to have learned English -- up to fifty words used in correct context -- no human being has been reported to have learned dolphinese.” – Carl Sagan
“If you want to make an apple pie from scratch, you must first create the universe.” – Carl Sagan
“Who are we? We find that we live on an insignificant planet of a humdrum star lost in a galaxy tucked away in some forgotten corner of a universe in which there are far more galaxies than people.” – Carl Sagan
“All of the books in the world contain no more information than is broadcast as video in a single large American city in a single year. Not all bits have equal value.” – Carl Sagan
“In science it often happens that scientists say, 'You know that's a really good argument; my position is mistaken,' and then they would actually change their minds and you never hear that old view from them again. They really do it. It doesn't happen as often as it should, because scientists are human and change is sometimes painful. But it happens every day. I cannot recall the last time something like that happened in politics or religion.” – Carl Sagan
“Think of how many religions attempt to validate themselves with prophecy. Think of how many people rely on these prophecies, however vague, however unfulfilled, to support or prop up their beliefs. Yet has there ever been a religion with the prophetic accuracy and reliability of science?” – Carl Sagan
“Somewhere, something incredible is waiting to be known.” – Carl Sagan
“When you make the finding yourself - even if you're the last person on Earth to see the light - you'll never forget it.” – Carl Sagan
"You know; when I look at the night sky and I see this enormous splendor of stars and galaxies, I sometimes ask the question, well how many worlds are we talking about? Well do the math, there are about 100 billion galaxies that are in the visible universe and each galaxy in turn contains about 100 billion stars, you multiply and you get about ten billion trillion stars. Well I think it is the height of arrogance to believe that we are alone in the universe, my attitude is that the universe is teaming, teaming with different kinds of life forms" -Michio Kaku
"The hardest thing in the world to understand is the income tax." – Albert Einstein
"Do not worry about your problems with mathematics; I assure you mine are far greater." – Albert Einstein
"Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former." – Albert Einstein
"The most incomprehensible thing about the universe is that it is comprehensible." – Albert Einstein
"The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources." – Albert Einstein
"Education is what remains after one has forgotten everything he learned in school." – Albert Einstein
“The significant problems we face cannot be solved at the same level of thinking we were at when we created them.” - Albert Einstein
“If quantum mechanics hasn't profoundly shocked you, you haven't understood it yet.” - Niels Bohr
“Your theory is crazy, but it's not crazy enough to be true.” - Niels Bohr
“The opposite of a fact is falsehood, but the opposite of one profound truth may very well be another profound truth.” - Niels Bohr
“To know that we know what we know, and to know that we do not know what we do not know, that is true knowledge.” – Copernicus
“Quit thy childhood, my friend, and wake up!” - Jean-Jacques Rousseau
I LOVE this coming quote
We are alone, absolutely alone on this chance planet: and, amid all the forms of life that surround us, not one, excepting the dog, has made an alliance with us.
- Maurice Maeterlinck
Diamonds, that'll shut her up.
Kiss my irish ass!
Nair mair shall a see the sun
For a fell tae a Germans gun
-Joseph Kilna MacKenzie, from the song Sgt. MacKenzie, We were soldiers soundtrack
"It simply is not enough that I must win, everyone else must lose." This is credited to Ghengis Kahn, among others.
I have many as well, unfortunately my memory is not so great that I can recall exact wordings of them all. My most recent favourite is this though...
"There are many ways, my dear, to vitimize people. The most insideous is to convince them they are victims." Half Asleep in Frog Pajamas - Tom Robbins
I once saw a very humourous graffito...
"Jesus Saves" then, obviously added by another author,"On Long Distance Calling."
Ooo.. I'm starting to remember some more now...
"And when ya get ta heaven may the Devil be yer Judge." Another Bag of Bricks - Flogging Molly
"Cant see the demons.. Till the demons come callin for you.. You're deaf to them screamin.. Till they're standin right behind you.." Queen Anne's Revenge - Flogging Molly
"if I'm a monster, I am a willing one.. this roller coaster ride is an enticing one.. on the tip of a continuum flowing wavelike through disorder.. carry me like a vessel to water" Marked - Bad Religion
No wonder I was remembering them, they're all song lyrics lol.
the point of war is not to die for your country, but to make the other bastard die for his.
Cause we find ourselves in the same old mess singing drunken lullabies
hi, my name is klusener.
Ha, I'm glad my common northern ways made an impression!
One of my favourites (and probably because it's a bit of a home truth) is:
"All things can be split into two categories; things which need fixing, and things which will need fixing once I've had a while to play with them"
If anyone know who (other than myself) to attribute this to, please let me know.
That sounds vaguely like something I might have heard in Tim Allen's old comedy routines. Not saying that for sure but I am pretty sure I have heard some variation of that before. For now you can keep the credit for it.
A Mathematician is a machine for turning coffee into theorems -- paul erdos
In mathematics you don't understand things. You just get used to them -- john von neumann
There are things which seem incredible to most men who have not studied mathematics -- archimedes
Television is something the Russians invented to destroy American education -- paul erdos
Do not lose your faith. A mighty fortress is our mathematics. Mathematics will rise to the challenge, as it always has. -- stan ulam
It would be very discouraging if somewhere down the line you could ask a computer if the Riemann hypothesis is correct and it said, `Yes, it is true, but you won't be able to understand the proof.' -- ron graham
Either mathematics is too big for the human mind or the human mind is more than a machine. -- kurt godel
Against stupidity, the gods themselves fight unvictorious -- schiller
physics is much too hard for physicists -- hilbert
The organic unity of mathematics is inherent in the nature of this science, for mathematics is the foundation of all exact knowledge of natural phenomena. That it may completely fulfil this high mission, may the new century bring it gifted masters and many zealous and enthusiastic disciples! -- hilbert
"Look again at that dot. That's here. That's home. That's us. On it everyone you love, everyone you know, everyone you ever heard of, every human being who ever was, lived out their lives. The aggregate of our joy and suffering, thousands of confident religions, ideologies, and economic doctrines, every hunter and forager, every hero and coward, every creator and destroyer of civilization, every king and peasant, every young couple in love, every mother and father, hopeful child, inventor and explorer, every teacher of morals, every corrupt politician, every "superstar," every "supreme leader," every saint and sinner in the history of our species lived there - on a mote of dust suspended in a sunbeam.
The Earth is a very small stage in a vast cosmic arena. Think of the rivers of blood spilled by all those generals and emperors, so that, in glory and triumph, they could become the momentary masters of a fraction of a dot. Think of the endless cruelties visited by the inhabitants of one corner of this pixel on the scarcely distinguishable inhabitants of some other corner, how frequent their misunderstandings, how eager they are to kill one another, how fervent their hatreds.
Our posturings, our imagined self-importance, the delusion that we have some privileged position in the Universe, are challenged by this point of pale light. Our planet is a lonely speck in the great enveloping cosmic dark. In our obscurity, in all this vastness, there is no hint that help will come from elsewhere to save us from ourselves.
The Earth is the only world known so far to harbor life. There is nowhere else, at least in the near future, to which our species could migrate. Visit yes. Settle, not yet. Like it or not, for the moment the Earth is where we make our stand.
It has been said that astronomy is a humbling and character building experience. There is perhaps no better demonstration of the folly of human conceits than this distant image of our tiny world. To me, it underscores our responsibility to deal more kindly with one another, and to preserve and cherish the pale blue dot, the only home we've ever known." -- carl sagan
last but certainly not least:
After ages during which the earth produced harmless trilobites and butterflies, evolution has progressed to the point at which it has produced Neros, Ghengis Khans & Hitlers. This, however, I believe is a passing nightmare; in time the earth will become again incapable of supporting life, and peace will return -- bertrand russell
Sorry there's so many.
I collect quotes while I surf the internet (especially forums), so apologies if I use your sig. Since I collect so many quotes, I have a lot that I like, so I've decided to disregard the original post and post many quotes. Quote collection is a hobby of mine (though I just realized it) and I have many (many) more I'm not posting, including my own.
"Softballs aren't soft." - My friend after getting a black eye from a softball.
The whole problem with the world is that fools and fanatics are always so certain of themselves, and wiser people so full of doubts.--Bertrand Russell
Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one. - Albert Einstein
Everything should be made as simple as possible, but not one bit simpler. - Albert Einstein
Anyone who is capable of getting themselves made President should on no account be allowed to do the job. - Douglas Adams
Ah, this is obviously some strange usage of the word 'safe' that I wasn't previously aware of. - Douglas Adams
He felt that his whole life was some kind of dream and he sometimes wondered whose it was and whether they were enjoying it. - Douglas Adams
Victory attained by violence is tantamount to a defeat, for it is momentary. - Mahatma Gandhi
No human thing is of serious importance. - Plato
The price good men pay for indifference to public affairs is to be ruled by evil men. - Plato
Everything is vague to a degree you do not realize till you have tried to make it precise. - Bertrand Russell
In all affairs it's a healthy thing now and then to hang a question mark on the things you have long taken for granted. - Bertrand Russell
Thou shouldst eat to live; not live to eat. - Socrates
I am not an Athenian or a Greek, but a citizen of the world. - Socrates
I have gained this by philosophy: that I do without being commanded what others do only from fear of the law. - Aristotle
Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man's character, give him power. - Abraham Lincoln
I always admired atheists. I think it takes a lot of faith. - Diane Frolov and Andrew Schneider
Sanity calms, but madness is more interesting. - John Russell
There is no great genius without some touch of madness. - Seneca
Politics is made up largely of irrelevancies. - Dalton Camp
The radical of one century is the conservative of the next. The radical invents the views. When he has worn them out the conservative adopts them. - Mark Twain
It only takes 20 years for a liberal to become a conservative without changing a single idea. - Robert Anton Wilson
"You got nine lives? Well I got ten shots." - unknown
"I lurk, therefore I might be." - unknown
"Guns don't kill. Bullets do. Guns only make them fly much faster." - unknown
Good quote! Smasherman >_^
I'm listening to 'My Heart Will Go On'...
Love can touch us one time and last for a lifetime. - Will Jennings
Real knowledge is to know the extent of one's ignorance. - Confucius
(my favorite quote!!)
Nothing in life is to be feared. It is only to be understood. - Marie Curie
And this is my belief:
To make your dream come true is the mission of everyone.
"It'sh me pawsh!" - Dick Van Dyke, in the greatest feat of modernist linguistics since James Joyce.
I collect quotes too, but I'll resist and post just one.
A witty saying proves nothing.
I think this guy has a great collection of quotes. The Oxford Dictionary of Quotations is also excellent, IMO.
Separate names with a comma.