View Full Version : Funny phrases taken out of context
I was reading one of the other posts and just got to thinking, what would happen if we had a post of funny phrases taken out of context?
So we need some rules:
Don't try and set up or explain the phrase
Try to keep other comments to a minimum (I've found it's impossible to cut them out completely).
Other than that all I have to say is:
"He has a wife, you know."
"They're on Double Secret Probation"
"I say: This is NOT funny!"
"Do birds eat beans to fly faster?"
(by the way comics, literary sources, etc. are okay too)
Chi Meson
Oct4-06, 12:04 PM
"I heard the jury's still out on science."
Is it twue what they say about how you people are...gifted?
"Emanuel Kant was a real piss-ant. who was very rarely stable,"
Heidegger, Heidegger was a woozy beggar who could drink you under the table (oops, that wasn't out of context, was it?)
Heidegger, Heidegger was a woozy beggar who could drink you under the table (oops, that wasn't out of context, was it?)
"Oh, it's twue. It's twue, it's twue!"
berkeman
Oct5-06, 10:37 AM
"It's a completely different kind of flying, altogether."
"It's a completely different kind of flying."
"Thank you sir, may I have another?"
"Thank you sir, may I have another?"
Yes please!:smile:
I can't leave her behind alone!
"Meanwhile, back at the farm, Grandma was beating off the indians."
"No matter where you go, there you are"
"Meanwhile, back at the farm, Grandma was beating off the indians.":devil: I just spewed coffee all over my work monitor. :grumpy:
"Remember this, Peregrin, when in doubt, always follow your nose".
:devil: I just spewed coffee all over my work monitor. :grumpy:
"Fortunately, I keep my feathers numbered for just such an emergency."
"Remember, you're fighting for this woman's honor, which is probably more than she ever did."
"If you ever had to climb a water tower ladder with a bucket of paint to defend your sister's honor, you're probably a redneck."
Pythagorean
Oct5-06, 01:43 PM
classic/generic:
"Put it in the hole, Stewart!"
"Can I rub one off?"
"By Grapthar's Hammer ... by the sons of Worvahn, you will be Avenged!"
"So I got that going for me, which is nice."
"That's your plan? Run!?"
Chi Meson
Oct5-06, 03:01 PM
"We're in the middle of space. Corner of 'no' and 'where'."
Nobody puts Baby in a corner.
Office_Shredder
Oct5-06, 05:24 PM
Damnit! I know the perfect story to get a quote from, but it's in a book across an ocean.
I'm making a house rule that this thread can't die until December 4th
larkspur
Oct5-06, 05:54 PM
From pagetutor (http://www.pagetutor.com/jokebreak/100.html).com
10. I need to whip it out by 5.
9. Mind if I use your laptop?
8. Just stick it in my box.
7. If I have to lick one more, I'll gag!
6. I want it on my desk, NOW!!!!!
5. Hmmmmm...I think it's out of fluid!
4. My equipment is so old, it takes forever to finish.
3. It's an entry level position.
2. When do you think you'll be getting off today?
1. It's not fair...I do all the work while he just sits there!!!
Racing aimlessly, getting nowhere fast.
If smytoms persist see your doctor.
larkspur, I like the office phrases out of context.
"It's m...m...my stappla."
"Why, you crazy - the fall'll probably kill ya!"
"Excuse me, do these effectively hide my thunder?"
-GeoMike-
"Nobody can be uncheered with a balloon"
"Well, Stephen... the bird's flightless?"..."It's not going anywhere."
Are we awake?
We're not sure. Are we black?
Yes, we are.
Then we're awake, but very puzzled.
Jackson's boob actually harmed anybody
"Phone call for Mike hunt. Has anybody seen Mike Hunt?"
berkeman
Oct7-06, 07:52 PM
"Phone call for Mike hunt. Has anybody seen Mike Hunt?"
No lie, we had a guy who got hired on to my work named Mike Hunt. We all did our best to rename him Michael Hunt, but it did not always work. :blushing:
There is no sign of intelligent life here.
"Son, you got a panty on your head."
"Son, you got a panty on your head."
Is it wollie woolram you are talking about now?
http://www.physicsforums.com/showpost.php?p=710500&postcount=680
Chi Meson
Oct8-06, 12:11 PM
"Excuse me, do these effectively hide my thunder?"
-GeoMike-
"He said some things African-Americany wasn't ready to hear either."
"Oh, fine then, if nobody does we don't have to, but make sure we do, just in case we don't."
Pythagorean
Oct10-06, 01:00 PM
Ooh, here's one I thought up especially for PF:
"Don't worry, I use latex"
"I got it...I got it...I got it...I don't got it."
Chi Meson
Oct10-06, 06:49 PM
"I got it...I got it...I got it...I don't got it."
"That kid gets no tip!"
"With a thing like that in his back, in the long run, he's better off."
And then one time I ate some rotten berries. Man, there were some strong gases seepin' outta my butt that day!
“A lot of people ask me if I were shipwrecked, and could only have one book, what would it be? I always say 'How to Build a Boat.'”
"I would rather be remembered for my own small contribution to science then for my accidental relationship to a famous...cuckoo."
"Want to go get some coffee?"
Luckily, it's a multipurpose lead sheet.
"I suggest you put on a tie."
IF YOU CAN DEFEAT JUNPEI IN MORTAL COMBAT YOU CAN ENTER.
But spelling isn't everything. There are days when spelling "Tuesday" simply doesn't count.
"Depends on who's playing Macbeth."
twisting_edge
Oct20-06, 04:36 AM
"Fishing for Martians with a swizzle stick?"
- yours truly (these things just slip out sometimes)
physics girl phd
Oct20-06, 04:58 AM
"He'd rather play with his robot than have [relations] with me."
twisting_edge
Oct20-06, 05:59 AM
"He'd rather play with his robot than have [relations] with me."
Huh? I can't imagine a context in which that would not make perfect sense.
I know the answer! The answer lies within the heart of all mankind!
The answer is twelve? I think I'm in the wrong building.
rhuthwaite
Oct20-06, 03:55 PM
"I suggest using a double fold so that one fold is beyond a control so that the control is visible, but when you get to the control swap to the fold before the control so that the original contol is still on the visible bit of the map."
"We can do that. We don't even need a reason."
ultranet
Oct27-06, 01:19 AM
amaizing......:rofl:
"Right in the lumber yard."
"There are only about 20 murders a year in London and not all are serious"
Scotland yard (- is also a yard)
"Not in the yard, from the yard."
Chi Meson
Oct27-06, 04:29 PM
"A palindrome of Bolton would be Notlob!"
units and dimensions,
A milli Helen (mH) is the amount of beauty that can launch a single ship
There, now my lip smells much better.
"My friends, we live in the greatest nation in the history of the world. I hope you’ll join with me as we try to change it."
JaredJames
Sep10-10, 09:19 PM
"Today's landing will be slightly more vertical than usual!"
Ivan Seeking
Sep11-10, 12:53 AM
"Lieutenant D'Sora just gave me what could be considered a very passionate kiss in the torpedo bay."
My first thought on seeing this thread was to take multiple quotes out of context. Something like this:
All your base are belong to us.
You're gonna have to answer to the Coca-Cola company.
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