Dealing with Road Rage: My Experiences and Advice

[haynewp]

For the past 10 years I have lived in a large city and have been introduced to road rage. Living in small towns previously, the state of mind was nothing like it is here and altercations rarely escalated to violence. I haven't handled my few situations intelligently. I didn't start the incidents (well not intentionally) but I actively defend myself when being cursed at and have challenged the other driver as well.

We have news reports all the time about road rage and how to deal with it. But sometimes they say to ignore the other person and not make eye contact, and other times they say ignoring the person makes the situation worse and you should acknowledge them in an apologetic manner even if you don't know what you did wrong.

What has been your experience with road rage and how did you handle it? How do you think you would handle it next time?

 

[BobG]

I've probably never gotten mad at another driver's mistake. Part of driving is realizing no one gets 100% their whole life. What does get me mad is another driver making a mistake and then getting mad at me.

For example, one of the streets here had had quite a bit of construction. One Monday morning, the street had obviously entered a new phase. All of the newly painted lanes suddenly had a jog to the right. Naturally, I followed the lanes and nearly took out a car in the adjacent lane that decided to go straight. She was lucky I was able to slow enough for her to get by, since I definitely wasn't going to go straight into oncoming traffic. She gave me the finger for nearly causing an accident! That's the sort of thing that puts you in a bad mood for awhile.

 

[JasonRox]

I don't drive anymore.

It's so much better in most cases. It's lovely taking the bus and just reading instead of driving.

Of course there are downsides to it too.

I'm saving $10 a day, making the environment cleaner, and living a less stressful life. Sounds like a good deal to me.

My school is a 25 minute drive away from my house and I still manage. Therefore, work being too far away is no excuse for having to drive. (unless it's like 40+ minutes away).

 

[haynewp]

The worst times have been the ones where I had the right of way but someone else thinks they did, and they started screaming and flipping me off. It is very hard for me to ignore them.

 

[FredGarvin]

The only thing that really gets me mad any more are people that are obviously not paying attention to the act of driving. They are doing everything else imaginable but concentrating on driving. Usually, those are the people that yell at you when they did something wrong because they are oblivious to what they just did.

 

[Cyrus]

Hah, one time I was driving home, and I changed lanes infront of this lady. Well, apparently that was a big issue for her, because I looked into my mirror and she was clapping for me, as to say, "oh good job." So since she was looking at me while clapping, I looked right back at her in my rear view mirror and just started laughing at her. Then she got really ticked off at me, and changed lanes as soon as she could, sped up along side me, and gave me the finger. I then turned to her, and went, AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAHAAHHAHAHAAHAHAHAHH. She got so mad, made herself look like a stupid a**, all because I changed lanes infront of her...I got a good laugh out of it though. She was some husky lady, maybe she was going home to stuff her face with more food.

The *best* thing though, was one time in the parking lot outside the shopping mall. I am going to pull into an open spot, so I start to pull in. As I do this old lady starts to pull out. So now I am stuck thanks to her. And she gets mad, starts moving back and forth finally going out. All the while, I am not moving an inch, because I *can't.* After she pulls out she looks at me and gives me the finger! She's like 80! I just could not help but laugh...she's awesome.

 

[turbo]

I have traveled all over the country as a training consultant, and by far the worst city I have driven in for bad drivers and road rage is Boston. If you see a car signal a turn, it's likely somebody from out of town, but if you see somebody signal a lane-change, it's almost certainly someone from a different state. Do not make eye-contact with a Boston driver, no matter how badly he cut you off, forced you to emergency-brake, swerve, etc - the minimum penalty is a raging, red-faced flip-off. It gets worse from there. One of the nicer cities to drive in is Indanappolis - as long as you're not on the loop to the north side during the morning rush hour. There are lots of banks and insurance companies with major office buildings there, and it seems that every employee is just a little bit "late" getting to work - and civility suffers a bit.

I you're on I-76 on the north side of Philly during either rush hour period, you will get cut off constantly by lane-changers if you don't tailgate the car in front of you. This is accepted practice and there is not much nastiness expressed in response, although at times it can make you feel like you are traveling backward if you are the victim of the cut-offs. I have often been stopped on I-76 only to creep for a while and stop again. From King of Prussia to Philly can be a nightmare. Friday afternoon, you do NOT want to be on this highway when people are going home.

 

[JasonRox]

I have traveled all over the country as a training consultant, and by far the worst city I have driven in for bad drivers and road rage is Boston. If you see a car signal a turn, it's likely somebody from out of town, but if you see somebody signal a lane-change, it's almost certainly someone from a different state. Do not make eye-contact with a Boston driver, no matter how badly he cut you off, forced you to emergency-brake, swerve, etc - the minimum penalty is a raging, red-faced flip-off. It gets worse from there. One of the nicer cities to drive in is Indanappolis - as long as you're not on the loop to the north side during the morning rush hour. There are lots of banks and insurance companies with major office buildings there, and it seems that every employee is just a little bit "late" getting to work - and civility suffers a bit.

I you're on I-76 on the north side of Philly during either rush hour period, you will get cut off constantly by lane-changers if you don't tailgate the car in front of you. This is accepted practice and there is not much nastiness expressed in response, although at times it can make you feel like you are traveling backward if you are the victim of the cut-offs. I have often been stopped on I-76 only to creep for a while and stop again. From King of Prussia to Philly can be a nightmare. Friday afternoon, you do NOT want to be on this highway when people are going home.

I thought Boston was a nice city.

It seems like you guys have it really bad in the US. In Canada people don't flip out that much I guess. I never got the finger or anything. It's mostly people with such bad driving skills it makes you angry.

 

[dav2008]

I tend to laugh at bad drivers rather than get angry at them.

The other week I saw a truck using the left lane to pass 2 cars when traffic was bumper to bumper and the left lane was ending within 500 feet.

 

[Moonbear]

I've probably never gotten mad at another driver's mistake. Part of driving is realizing no one gets 100% their whole life. What does get me mad is another driver making a mistake and then getting mad at me.

For example, one of the streets here had had quite a bit of construction. One Monday morning, the street had obviously entered a new phase. All of the newly painted lanes suddenly had a jog to the right. Naturally, I followed the lanes and nearly took out a car in the adjacent lane that decided to go straight. She was lucky I was able to slow enough for her to get by, since I definitely wasn't going to go straight into oncoming traffic. She gave me the finger for nearly causing an accident! That's the sort of thing that puts you in a bad mood for awhile.

Yeah, I ran into that a lot in Michigan...not the place I ever expected it. Growing up in NJ, well, who could ever tell? The traffic is too thick and goes in too many directions to pay attention to anyone driver. Everyone flipped everyone else off, it was almost expected, and all you can really do is just shrug.

I haven't run into any road rage type incidents where I am now, but oh boy, are the drivers bad! We have center turn lanes on the roads surrounding the campus, but it seems that's not good enough. If someone's already in the turn lane, and someone else wants to make a turn just a little past them, do they get behind them and wait their turn? No. Do they continue past them and get in the turn lane? No. They drive on the wrong side of the road until they get to their turn! I can't count how many times I've seen this. And, add to it the people jaywalking...standing IN the turn lane where you can't see them until you pull into the turn lane...I'm surprised there aren't more fatal accidents around here. There certainly are a lot of accidents for a small town though. I don't even understand it. It might take...oh...I don't know...an extra minute...if you followed the laws and waited for a clearing to make your turn. Considering it only takes 15 min to drive completely from one end of town to the other, along the 35 mph, twisting, winding roads, it's not really that big of a deal. It's not like you sit in traffic for an hour and are at wit's end by the time you get to work 20 min late as in some cities. I'm not in such a hurry, so I just give everyone room to do what they want to do...when I get to work, I only have the 3 gazillion stairs to climb from the parking lot to the building, so I'm never in much of a hurry to get to those!

 

[JasonRox]

I tend to laugh at bad drivers rather than get angry at them.

The other week I saw a truck using the left lane to pass 2 cars when traffic was bumper to bumper and the left lane was ending within 500 feet.

The average truck driver is a better driver than the average joe in a car or SUV.

 

[franznietzsche]

I grew up driving in Los Angeles traffic. I commuted 53 miles to work every day for 2 years before moving to school. I've never had a single problem with road rage, nor have I ever seen it. Even in the parking lot that is the 405 during rush hour in the Sepulveda pass. Must be an east coast thing.

 

[Cyrus]

Yeah, people on the east coast are not too nice franz. You got a god damn problem with that!? Then move out of my lane! <Fingers Franz!>

Yeah Jason, I have seen truck drivers bust U-turns you would not believe at high speeds too. They are impressive.

Let me give you an Idea of the scum bags in the DC/vigrinia area. One guy got into an accident with another driver. He got so pissed off, he took the lady's dog out of her car, and threw it onto the high way. It ran down the road and got killed, and he drove off. Another time, A guy pulled a gun and started shooting at another car. On his car was a bumper sticker that said, 'keep honking, I am reloading.' Red neck.

 

[JasonRox]

Yeah Jason, I have seen truck drivers bust U-turns you would not believe at high speeds too. They are impressive.

Not only in driving skills, but driving safety too.

 

[turbo]

I thought Boston was a nice city.

Some things there are nice, but not the drivers. The worst drivers and the nastiest drivers in the country, IMO. They make New Yorkers look like sweethearts. Have you driven in Quebec City in heavy traffic? Give those guys some PCP and a little meth and they could be Boston drivers. As I said, if they signal a turn, they are not from Boston, and if they signal a lane change, they are not from Massachusetts. If you see a driver in Boston slow down and stop when the light turns yellow, he is not from Boston. The rule there is that if you are approaching the intersection and the light is yellow, speed up because the guy in back of you is going to speed up and you don't want to get rear ended. I have biker friends in Quincy on the south shore and they keep asking me to come down and visit. There is no way I am going to ride through eastern Mass on a Softail surrounded by idiots riding in cars and trucks. The south shore gang comes up to Maine every summer (wisely trailering their bikes to central Maine) to ride with me and my friends and we Mainers take turns leading them out on rides through twisty roads in the western mountains, the farm country, or maybe down to the coast. None of us native Mainers, nor the transplants from Mass ever venture into the greater Boston area on bikes - too dangerous.

 

[JasonRox]

Some things there are nice, but not the drivers. The worst drivers and the nastiest drivers in the country, IMO. They make New Yorkers look like sweethearts. Have you driven in Quebec City in heavy traffic? Give those guys some PCP and a little meth and they could be Boston drivers. As I said, if they signal a turn, they are not from Boston, and if they signal a lane change, they are not from Massachusetts. If you see a driver in Boston slow down and stop when the light turns yellow, he is not from Boston. The rule there is that if you are approaching the intersection and the light is yellow, speed up because the guy in back of you is going to speed up and you don't want to get rear ended. I have biker friends in Quincy on the south shore and they keep asking me to come down and visit. There is no way I am going to ride through eastern Mass on a Softail surrounded by idiots riding in cars and trucks. The south shore gang comes up to Maine every summer (wisely trailering their bikes to central Maine) to ride with me and my friends and we Mainers take turns leading them out on rides through twisty roads in the western mountains, the farm country, or maybe down to the coast. None of us native Mainers, nor the transplants from Mass ever venture into the greater Boston area on bikes - too dangerous.

No one slows down at the yellow light around here.

Not that many people signal lane changes.

Not that many people signal turns around here either.

It sounds rather normal over there. It almost sounds like you had a bad weekend there and are thrashing the drivers for it or something.

 

[scorpa]

No one slows down at the yellow light around here.

From the way people around here drive I'm pretty sure that they think that yellow means to speed up so you can make it through before the red.

 

[Drimar]

come on, keep it moving, we are on a highway No 55 without police or cameras around

 

[Gale]

i say boston drivers are the worst too. vermont highways are my favorite though. everyone stays in the right lane except to pass, the way it should be, and everyone always signals. mass-holes are the worst though. i hate when its tourist season at home, cause all the mass drivers come over and start being jerks and cutting off pedestrians and such. i think the most annoying is when you're at a 4 way intersection, and everyone is all nice and trying to let everyone else go, so like, everyone just inches out, and is like "oh sorry, no you" its a nightmare. course, you can always tell when a mass person is at the other stop sign. you go to wave for them to go ahead, but then you realized they've already left. every time that happens I'm like "woah.. heh. ok"

also, people get waaaay too mad at honking. i like to drive reasonably fast, we have loads of old people who don't. so, i give them the ole "beep beep" just letting them know that I'm back there, and they pull over. no problem. some people get pretty pissed though. meh.

 

[Moonbear]

Boston is a pretty awful city for driving. I can't even quite describe the drivers there. If they see an inch between two cars, they'll try to cut in. You have to just assume anyone could do anything at any time there. Maybe it makes more sense to those who live and drive there every day, but to someone from out of town, it's downright scary.

 

[JasonRox]

comments
If you want to see crazy driving try Montreal. I was driving in a FUNERAL ... slow and you have your flashers on because you're allowed to run red lights. ...
blogs.law.harvard.edu/...//blogs. law.harvard.edu%2Fphilg%2F2003%2F07%2F21%23a917 - 20k - Cached - Similar pages

http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/philg/...//blogs.law.harvard.edu/philg/2003/07/21#a917

Link it down right now.

But this guy is from around Boston and still says there is worst. I knew Montreal was very bad among the world, but I wasn't sure how bad though. I know they run redlights regularly over there. It's the French way.

Therefore, unlike Boston, if you slow down or stop for a redlight, you aren't from Montreal. Much worse than yellow lights.

 

[Chi Meson]

Boston is a pretty awful city for driving. I can't even quite describe the drivers there. If they see an inch between two cars, they'll try to cut in.

Uh, yeah. That was me. Sorry. I saw a parking spot on the other side and I had to get left.

Actually, I was going to say what already was said: laugh at the sad little people. Escalating an irrational exchange will always get nowhere.

I think some people have what I call a "Nintendo attitude." Everything they do is worth points; if a car gets ahead of them they lose points, if they make it through the next light they gain points. Some of the things people do can't save any more than 30 seconds of their time.

 

[BobG]

No one slows down at the yellow light around here.

From the way people around here drive I'm pretty sure that they think that yellow means to speed up so you can make it through before the red.

Well, duh! Haven't you heard of Doppler shift? Slowing down would make the light appear redder. Speeding up makes the light appear greener. Geez, don't they teach you these things in Driver's Ed or something?