well i am not as wise as i wish i were. my situation is my own. and everyone has to figure out how to deal with their special conditions. it took me 35 years to attain my goal of a phd.
I was "good" at math. but very spoiled and lazy in high school, and essentially never studied. so for me it was a matter of learning to work hard and to go to class.
But I eventually got to a level where the math was also hard, in grad school.
If a student is trying his/her best already in college and struggling, for various reasons, too much outside work, too many social activities, innate difficulty with the ideas, it does not matter.all of us have challenges. if we are having a really hard time doing something, we still have options, we can give up some other activities and devote even more time to it, or we can lower our expectations, and accept that it will take longer to achieve our goals, we can change areas to something that works out better.\\or we can be glad we are able to work in the area we enjoy, and give ourselves some slack on the benchmarks.