Write-a-Limerick

[quddusaliquddus]

This is a lim-e-rick thread
As you can tell from the head
If you are a writer
Please pass the lighter
Otherwise my face will go red
[:mad:]

[arildno]

There was this guy from Texas,
who'd found a terrorist nexus
in a little known zoo
in the cage of a kangaroo
he went in, well armed, but was kicked in the solar plexus

[Jenn_ucsb]

There once was a woman in lace
Her boobs were all over the place
Her friends were disgusted
With laughter they busted
And sent her out into space

[Jenn_ucsb]

There once was a man in leather
With his groin he could tell the weather
But he never eats
'Cause he's got so much meat
So he just floated off like a feather

...I seem to have a theme...people in kinky clothing leaving the earth...

[hypnagogue]

Here's one I wrote and performed at the poetry slam of this year's Towards a Science of Consciousness convention in Tuscon. disclaimer: You need some familiarity with philosophy of mind to completely get it. :tongue2:

"A British Philosopher of Mind Talks Past His Eliminativist Woman on their First Date." (read in a British accent to make the rhymes work... and to increase the humor value. :biggrin: )

I once met a colorblind Mary
Whose paradigms I did quite fancy
We concurred a great deal
But when I brought up 'raw feels'
She gave me a slap prima facie!

[zoobyshoe]

The Absent Minded Jellyfish

When a jellyfish goes out a walkin',
All the people around start a talkin'.
On his tentacles, ten,
He'll wear shoes, just like men
But he'll never remember one stockin'.

[zoobyshoe]

A Night At The Opera

Once a jellyfish sang at the opera,
But was cursed by what sounded like doppla'.
Though she sang like a harp,
Every note ended sharp,
And she never became really popla'.

[jimmy p]

I always wanted to know how

"there was an old man from Nantucket" ended.

There was a young lad called Jim
Who thought he would go for a swim
He jumped in the pool
And felt like a fool
Cos there was no water in.

[tribdog]

There once was a boy with a problem
It seems something was wrong with his noggin'
"My name's Jimmy P"
"and what's bothering me"
"Is I can't tell my head from my bottom."

[Hurkyl]

There once was a man from Nantucket,
Who kept all of his cash in a bucket,
But his daughter, named Nan,
Ran away with a man,
And as for the bucket, Nantucket.

[zoobyshoe]

There once was a boy with a problem
It seems something was wrong with his noggin'
"My name's Jimmy P"
"and what's bothering me"
"Is I can't tell my head from my bottom."
You can get away with "problem" (problum) and "bottom" (bottum) but "noggin"s gotta go.

[zoobyshoe]

In Nantucket there was an old man
Who got lost on his way to the can.
He looked all around,
But it couldn't be found.
So he improvised with an old pan.

[tribdog]

You can get away with "problem" (problum) and "bottom" (bottum) but "noggin"s gotta go.
On the far away planet Zooby
Lives an alien critical to me
"I don't like your rhyme,"
"It's a waste of my time."
Oh why does he treat me so sh*tty?

[zoobyshoe]

If you're trying for rhyming with "Zooby"
The vowels you're seeking are "oo ee".
To use the word "sh*tty"
Is wrong. (And not pretty.)
And it just makes you look like a booby.

[tribdog]

I wonder if Zooby is drunk
his critique is nothing but bunk.
He should be nice
cause I won't ask him twice.
"Now do you feel lucky? Punk."

[tribdog]

Now Zooby I don't want to fight.
This really could take us all night.
So listen to this:
Do you want to kiss?
Just ask me. And maybe, I might.

[tribdog]

What a stupid mistake, I say.
Zooby's an honorary gray.
I misread his name
now I'm filled shame.
I kissed 'cause I thought it said gay.

[Math Is Hard]

LOL!!!! nicely done!

[Evo]

Tribdog, you are too much. :biggrin:

[The_Professional]

Tribdog, will you have my babies?

[zoobyshoe]

Now that I've taught poor Tribdog to rhyme,
All the girls want a piece of his time.
I hope now he'll see
That advice that's from me
Steers him clear of poetical crime.

[tribdog]

Zooby, I feel like a fool.
But I really enjoyed having our duel.
While I think I'm the best
I can say without jest,
Your rhyming was truely a jewel.

[zoobyshoe]

It could be that now you're the best,
Since your lines can now pass the rhyme test,
But it's quite plain to see
You're a nut, just like me,
To waste time in a limerick fest.

[tribdog]

Well, Zooby. Our dues have been paid.
So now we can stop this charade.
If we play our cards right,
put a stop to this fight.
these poems just might get us laid.

[hypnagogue]

A limmerick is not fancy prose.
This is a fact that everyone knows!
You can make 'em wordy,
But if they ain't dirty,
Then you'll just make everyone doze!

[Enuma_Elish]

A postcard found me at home
It said it was sent from Nome
Where I do not live near
Still the postcard is here
It was from my long lost Gnome!

[tribdog]

I thought that this thread had been killed.
The fact of which made me quite thrilled.
It was fresh at the time,
but I reread my rhyme,
and the freshness has somehow congealed.

[mattmns]

That little guy tribdog thinks he can rhyme,
I guess he doesn't know that it's not his time,
to shine here at PF, if he got a grade it'd have to been an F,
everything here is fair and square, so don't call a Ref,
you just got ripped in half with a crazy dope rhyme.

hmm, I think I tried to make that too complex
now people are going think that I can't flex,
my lyircal muscle, cause thats what I want to prove,
show you just how my words will soothe.

[mattmns]

hmm, Tribdog has yet to respond,
I guess that means I'm like Bond,
when it comes to murdering wanna bee rhymers,
cause when it's masterful ryhmes I'm no first timer!
Come on trib, wave that magical wand.

[mattmns]

Man o man, I just can't stop flowin,
I'm like Enigerizer I just keep on goin,
on and on for days and days,
it seems like my skillful rhymes will always,
keep me on top, over trib, cause that's who I'll do in!

[tribdog]

I'll answer you without a doubt.
I'd started, but my power went out
So I went for a walk.
There's no lights on my block
Like your head, I'm sorry. Don't pout.

[Galileo]

Something doesn't seem allright
I'm staying up, into the night
Addicted to the forum
or just out of bore'dum
I feel like staying up 'till light.

Homework's piling up on me
Got some tests in a day or three
Should be working, but instead
I`m reading rhymes from trib and matt
Gotta hits the beds, so see..


..you guys laterzzz :zzz:

[mattmns]

You know I won't pout, you said your power went out,
guess you could say my rhymes knocked your lights out.
Back to the topic, I hope you had a good walk,
cause my lyrics will give you a smack and force you to balk,
but seriously trib, you and I, it won't be much of a bout.

[tribdog]

You suffer from a lack of rhythm.
Syllable counters? You need 'em.
A haiku is 5-7-5
I'd like to see yours, if you tried.
You'd go three-twenty four-then eleven.

[mattmns]

Lack of rhythm you say,
but you know I can play,
with your head all day.
I'll keep going, you'll pay,
with a smack if I may.

[tribdog]

I'm going to go take a shower
I'll be back here in less than an hour
You take your time
and work on your rhyme
I'll be back soon to show you my power.

[mattmns]

Thank you trib, cause man you really stink,
your rhymes are terrible, it's like you don't think,
when you put words together, it's like grinding nails on,
a chalkboard, remember I'm the teacher and it's on.
Your rhymes are.. maybe they'll be better after a drink.

[tribdog]

Your poems, do they make you proud?
They really stand out in a crowd.
But so does a guy
with unzippered fly
You should feel shame, and have your head bowed.

[tribdog]

What? you're not drunk?
Damn, it's worse than I thunk.
You have no excuse
and you rhyme like a moose
you're simply a no talent punk.

[tribdog]

Matt: the limerick wrecker
types with one hand on his _____
your rhymes are so bad
it's really so sad
You should try clicking on the crap-checker

[brewnog]

There once was a Trib from Iran,
Who wrote verse that just wouldn't scan,
When asked why that was,
He said it's because,
He likes to fit as many words into the last line of his poems as he possibly can.

[tribdog]

lol
funny.

[Enuma_Elish]

I was just lurking around, reading posts
I wasn't even looking for sexy hosts
When I came across Evo
Who had a ticket to this show
That's how it was reclaimed from ghosts.

[tribdog]

It's Evo who I should blame?
Damn, that's truely a shame.
She's not talking to me
No matter how hard I plea
I'm sorry! I'll try to be tame.

[mattmns]

Hearing these whack rhymes, I should take a header,
maybe if I wait, there will be something better,
but they would certainly not top the master,
bate is what will make the time go faster.
So I will wait, maybe even go write a letter.

[mattmns]

I thank you Evo for bringing this to my attention,
you would think funny would mean good rhyme invention,
but it doesn't, man is trib off tonight,
maybe it's just me, cause I'm so tight.
What the **** am I going to rhyme with attention?

[tribdog]

A letter? Why stop at one?
Write a hundred, that would be fun.
Cause when you're not here.
there's no pain in my ear.
And those letters, please send me none.

[mattmns]

Trib! now that was real good,
in fact it even changed mood,
I am no longer happy, now I grief,
rhymes so good I'll call you a thief.
I guess my excuse will be time for food.

[tribdog]

I'll be happy as long as you go
Your poems are worse than you know.
Try reading out loud
you won't be so proud
Your prose doesn't go with the flow.

[mattmns]

I think I am done for the night,
this will give trib time to bite,
my rhymes, which you know are number one,
yeah, you can't touch my lyrical massacre son,
spectators, sorry but it's gonna be a short fight.

[zoobyshoe]

I think I am done for the night,
this will give trib time to bite,
my rhymes, which you know are number one,
yeah, you can't touch my lyrical massacre son,
spectators, sorry but it's gonna be a short fight.
Oh, Matt, you are having no luck,
For your limericks truthfully suck.
You ought to back down,
Cause you sound like a clown,
And most chickens more lyrically cluck.

[Moonbear]

Everyone seems to pick on Matt,
When his limericks fall a bit flat.
He tries really hard,
But misses by a yard,
Because rhythm can't be pulled from a hat.

(Dammit Greg, I need that groan smiley, stat!!!)

[TheStatutoryApe]

There once was a mentor named Moonie
Who often was quite a bit moody
Twas the chocolate she craved
And the reason she behaved
In a manner some thought a bit loony

[TheStatutoryApe]

There once was a woman from Exeter
So beautiful men craned their necks at her
One daring young knave
Even ventured to wave
The distinguishing mark of his sex at her.


There once was a couple William and Nelly
Who spent their honeymoon belly to belly
Because in their haste
They used library paste
Instead of petrolium jelly

[zoobyshoe]

Contest: Supply the very difficult last rhyme:


"I think lim'ricks should never be nasty,
Or insult those who need rhinoplasty,
But once in a while,
I do get a smile,
From a poke at someone _ _ __ __"

[Moonbear]

There once was a couple William and Nelly
Who spent their honeymoon belly to belly
Because in their haste
They used library paste
Instead of petrolium jelly
:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

There once was a mentor named Moonie
Who often was quite a bit moody
Twas the chocolate she craved
And the reason she behaved
In a manner some thought a bit loony
:grumpy:

I work with someone who seems like a klutz,
When we're together, all we hit are ruts.
As her hands grow unsteady,
We can't explain this malady,
Except that she's allergic to nuts. :tongue2:

[Moonbear]

Contest: Supply the very difficult last rhyme:


"I think lim'ricks should never be nasty,
Or insult those who need rhinoplasty,
But once in a while,
I do get a smile,
From a poke at someone _ _ __ __"

...who paid my last fee. (darn, a syllable too long)
...running past me. (a bit better)

[zoobyshoe]

The ideal solution must end in "asty" since this is so firmly established in the first two lines. I'm not sure there are any words that fit that bill.

The best I could do was:

"From a poke at someone who's an ***-flea."

[cotarded]

"I think lim'ricks should never be nasty,
Or insult those who need rhinoplasty,
But once in a while,
I do get a smile,
From a poke at someone _ _ __ __"

From a poke at someone "a bit flab-by?"


Nice rhymes in here.
Tribdog: :surprised
(which doesn't really compare to the guy asking you to have his babies, but hey)

lates,
cotarded.
edit: didn't see zoobyshoe's since I spent like 15 minutes trying to write my own limerick, which was a total failure.

[Moonbear]

The ideal solution must end in "asty" since this is so firmly established in the first two lines. I'm not sure there are any words that fit that bill.
How about..."From a poke at someone's tush vasty."

http://encarta.msn.com/encnet/features/dictionary/DictionaryResults.aspx?refid=1861732251

I'm definitely using a liberal dose of poetic license (and I might not have passed my licensing exam there) to arrange the words that way and use an archaic form of the word.

There's also a word, masty, that means full of mast, as in acorns.

http://dictionary.reference.com/search?q=Masty&r=66

A nifty site I found to help with these things:
http://www.rhymezone.com/r/rhyme.cgi?

[zoobyshoe]

As her hands grow unsteady,
We can't explain this malady,
Moonbear, please go to the board and write "I will not try to rhyme "unsteady" and "malady" ever again," 100 times.

[Moonbear]

As her hands grow unsteady,
We can't explain this malady,
Moonbear, please go to the board and write "I will not try to rhyme "unsteady" and "malady" ever again," 100 times.
Yep, I checked, they revoked my poetic license back in 1997.

[zoobyshoe]

Yep, I checked, they revoked my poetic license back in 1997.

I'm sorry, but in that case you may have to do time.

[zoobyshoe]

lates,
cotarded.
edit: didn't see zoobyshoe's since I spent like 15 minutes trying to write my own limerick, which was a total failure.
Hmmmm. Hard to believe you're not a natural wordsmith.

By the way, what does "lates" mean?

[hypnagogue]

I think lim'ricks should never be nasty,
Or insult those who need rhinoplasty,
But once in a while,
I do get a smile,
From a poke at a golfer's brass tee

OK, lame whiff at that one. I like this one better.


Them home brews should never taste nasty,
Or insult a nose needin' 'plasty,
But once in a while
I do broach a smile
From a sip of me pungent gas-tea.

[Lisa!]

The boy rented a room
he was a new groom
his wife was not so nice
their dinner was always rice
they were afrai of gloom! :redface:

[zoobyshoe]

Folks, people aren't getting the rhythm thing. The first, second and last line should all have the same number of syllables as each other. The second and third line match each other in syllables as well. Now, beyond that, you want to strive such that the stresses also are in the same place in each of the three, and each of the two.

Here is THE classic limerick:

There once was a lad from Nantucket
Whose ____ was so long he could ___ it.
He said with a grin,
As he licked off his chin,
If my ear was a ____ I could ___ it.

Now the rhythm in that is clear, definite, and unmistakable. It's easy to recite: just rolls of the tongue, and the reader doesn't have to do any gymnastics to make it work.

[hypnagogue]

The boy rented a room
he was a new groom
his wife was not so nice
their dinner was always rice
they were afrai of gloom! :redface:


There once was a man from Nantucket
Who vomited blood in a bucket.
The reason, you see,
He loved lim'ricks, did he,
But witnessed this one and then chucked it.

[zoobyshoe]

When Hypnagogue started critiquin'
The blood everywhere began leakin'
Our fear of his pen,
Made mice out of men,
And our underwear's started a reekin'.

[Jelfish]

These lim'ricks are quite entertaining.
This statement I swear I'm not feigning.
Though some are quite yucky
Their authors are lucky
that Zooby provides proper training

[Jelfish]

My apartment is falling to pieces
And it seems my rent only increases
The walls are bright orange
I'm missing a door-hinge
And so I'll be through when my lease is.

[zoobyshoe]

Excellent work, Oh young, gelatinous sea-creature! You found a rhyme for "orange"!

[matthyaouw]

and the reader doesn't have to do any gymnastics to make it work.

These words took me quite by surpise.
I couldn't believe my eyes.
one's ___ in one's ear
needs 'gymnastics' my dear.
Your statement was nothing but lies.

It turns out you spoke of the prose,
not the subject the author chose.
I felt quite a tit
when i realised it.
but yes, the rhyme certainly flows.

[zoobyshoe]

That Nantucket tale is not "prose".
It's a poem about a long hose.
So while mildly gymnastic
He was not that fantastic,
As a maker of leg knots and bows.

[mattmns]

Are my rhymes really that bad?
Cause if they are i'll be sad.
I guess it's time to hand over the throne,
and where is greg with that smilie, the moan?
Don't worry I'm not too mad.

-- If I do suck, then I blame this whole limmerick thing, I don't like having to throw in that last sentence. Damn mykeybard is srewing up!!!!

[El Hombre Invisible]

-- If I do suck, then I blame this whole limmerick thing, I don't like having to throw in that last sentence. Damn mykeybard is srewing up!!!!
My kyboard is als erratic
It mkes me type lke a spastic
Nowthespacebar'sstppedspacing
andican'tdouppercasing
whatameaninglesswasteofplastic

[Enuma_Elish]

Here is THE classic limerick:
There once was a lad from Nantucket
Whose ____ was so long he could ___ it.
He said with a grin,
As he licked off his chin,
If my ear was a ____ I could ___ it.There once was a lad from Nantucket
Whose tongue? was so long he could not cluck? it.
He said with a grin,
As he licked off his chin,
If my ear was a candy? I could lick? it.

[zoobyshoe]

Are my rhymes really that bad?
Cause if they are i'll be sad.
I guess it's time to hand over the throne,
and where is greg with that smilie, the moan?
Don't worry I'm not too mad.

-- If I do suck, then I blame this whole limmerick thing, I don't like having to throw in that last sentence. Damn mykeybard is srewing up!!!!
It's not the rhymes, they're fine. Your rhythms are all cranky and clunky. Learn from the Nantucket limerick. In Limerick terms, it's like the force. "Feel the Nantucket Limerick, Luke! Sense it all around you!"

[El Hombre Invisible]

It's not the rhymes, they're fine. Your rhythms are all cranky and clunky. Learn from the Nantucket limerick. In Limerick terms, it's like the force. "Feel the Nantucket Limerick, Luke! Sence it all around you!"
I tried that and I got tickled in my ear. Scared the bejesus out of me.

While you're perfectly able to rhyme
You should learn from Zoobie's paradigm
Of how verses scan
So the lines therein can
Last equal durations of time

[Enuma_Elish]

Gnome sent a pic pos'd as a pasha
Said he was staying with Natasha
First I could not know
Until I guess'd how
He must have travel'd on to Russia!

[Lisa!]

My name is Lisa!
I always eat pizza.
Whenever I feel sad,
your words make me mad
Lisa pizza Lisa pizza! :cool:

<zoobie isn't around here, is he? :uhh:>

[El Hombre Invisible]

My name is Lisa!
I always eat pizza.
Whenever I feel sad,
your words make me mad
Lisa pizza Lisa pizza! :cool:
<zoobie isn't around here, is he? :uhh:>
There was a young lady named Lisa!
Who fell from the tower of Pisa
Landed on her head
Henceforth all that she said
Was nothing but nonsense to me, sir!

Of course, I jest. o:)

[Enuma_Elish]

A young lady was nam'd Lisa!
She might have spew'd like a geysa!
That's lotsa hot water
Which rise from a crater
'Tho she is a good advisa!

[___]

there was a guy
totally hi-fi
the ultimate man
dont mess with him, else "BAHM!"
cos he's totally hi-fi

[zoobyshoe]

When Newton observed a red fruit
Smash apart on the ground near his boot,
He looked at the moon,
And he started to swoon,
Cause if that fell then he would be moot.

[___]

When Newton observed a red fruit
Smash apart on the ground near his boot,
He looked at the moon,
And he started to swoon,
Cause if that fell then he would be moot.

:rofl::rofl::rofl:
that was the ultimate one, i think.:smile:

[Lisa!]

There was a young lady named Lisa!
Who fell from the tower of Pisa
Landed on her head
Henceforth all that she said
Was nothing but nonsense to me, sir!
Of course, I jest. o:)
There was an invisible man,
who was very deadpan.
His jokes were so awful
He treated me like a fool.
He liked to get a suntan!

Of cours, I jest too!o:)

[Jelfish]

For any of of you who are still unsure of the rhythm:

A limerick is in 4/4 time (EDIT: I guess since it's in triplets it should be 12/8 or something). The strong accents go on the first and third beat and the weak accents go on the second and fourth beat. In a limerick, there is always some sort of rest at the end of each line. Also in a limerick there is often an eighth-note long pickup before the first beat. In addition, the first, second, and fifth line rhyme.

-----1st beat 3rd beat
--------| |
there ONCE was a Man from nanTUCKet
--| | |
pickup 2nd beat rest (4th beat)
in music notation, it would look like

-----| |
-|\ | |--|--| |--|--| |\ | |
-| | | | | | | | | | (rest & pickup) |
x| | x| x| x| x| x| x| x| x| |
-----| |

Now, the rhythm doesn't have to be exactly like that, but the accents must be in the right spot.
The next important thing is that the rhythm pattern that you establish from line one must be the same in lines 2 and 5.

There once was a man from Nantucket.
Whos ____ was so ____ he could pluck it.

la LA la la La la la LA la (rest)
la LA la la La la la LA la (rest)

Now the 4th and 5th line are halved (which some of you aren't getting). They also rhyme with each other, but do not rhyme with the first, second, and fifth. The time switches to 2/2 (or if you prefer, each line gets two beats in 4/4). The accent still goes on the first beat of the measure (and the 3rd if you're in 4/4)

he SAID with a Grin
and WIPED off his Shin

Those two lines should take as long to say together as one of the longer lines plus its rest.

la LA la la La (quick rest)
la LA la la La (quick rest)

(I don't feel like writing the music again)

And the last line is rhythmically the same as the first and second and rhyme with them as well.
__ ___ ___ ___ ___ Peking duck-it.

You should be able to feel the stresses even though most of the line is blank.

Now, in practice, these rules can be stretched just a bit for the sake of fitting better words. But what makes a great limerick is the choosing of the best fitting words for the context and staying within the prescribed rhythm.

Good luck

[Enuma_Elish]

Another card sent by the Gnome
Had a postmark that said "from Rome"
It pictur'd th'Pope
And gave me hope
That the Gnome is still on a roam

(I can't play the piano, either.) :smile:

[matthyaouw]

Limericks have a triplet feel.
You might say hey no big deal,
but bend the time rules,
and you'll all sound like fools,
and your rhymes will sound quite surreal.

[Moonbear]

Excellent work, Oh young, gelatinous sea-creature! You found a rhyme for "orange"!
You must be from California to think that rhymed! :bugeye:

[tribdog]

Thanks Jelfish for setting us straight.
Although all my poems are great.
When it comes to gender,
you catcher or sender?
Cause Artman could sure use a date.

[Jelfish]

I'm confused; are you asking my sex?
Please wait while I check out my specs
But speaking of Artman
He is quite the smart man
I'm male but for him, I'd be flex.

[tribdog]

excellent. very funny

[Jelfish]

You must be from California to think that rhymed! :bugeye:

I'm originally from Boston and it rhymes according to my "accent". Orange's "or" is pronounced like the "or" in core, store, poor, door. The "ange" part is pronounced "inj" like "injustice", which also rhymes with "hinge." If you then add in a bit of a cockney accent, the h in hinge disappears and you get a perfect rhyme!

[LeBrad]

Name that mathematician:

This man's not an Edmonton skata'
But he married e to i theta
And though he went blind
Still managed to find
Gamma's cousin, the integral beta

[zoobyshoe]

Name that mathematician:

This man's not an Edmonton skata'
But he married e to i theta
And though he went blind
Still managed to find
Gamma's cousin, the integral beta

I don't know who it is, but it's a very fine limerick.

[zoobyshoe]

You must be from California to think that rhymed! :bugeye:
I do pronounce it "or-inge". Don't know where I picked that up, though.

[Jelfish]

Name that mathematician:

This man's not an Edmonton skata'
But he married e to i theta
And though he went blind
Still managed to find
Gamma's cousin, the integral beta

"e to i theta"? "integral beta"? Must be Euler

[Jelfish]

It's four and I'm still wide awake.
And tomorrow a test I will take.
I'll give up this fight
and write lim'ricks all night
to see now how many I'll make

[Jelfish]

Astonishing! look what I found!
In my fridge slowly forming a mound
on the bread was some mold
it was several weeks old
And in back, something's moving around.

[Jelfish]

I'm sitting here drinking a pepsi
To stay awake, it's the first step, see?
My flourecent light
is flick'ring and bright
Good thing I don't have epilepsy

[Jelfish]

This is starting to get kind of dumb
I'm just sitting here twiddling my thumb
I should practice my horn
or search for some porn
I'd fall asleep after I ...

[Jelfish]

Ok I think that I'm done
I guess this was mildly fun
I'll open a text
and fall asleep next,
before I can start to see sun.

[zoobyshoe]

All very excellent, Jelfish!

[Jonny_trigonometry]

Haikus are much easier to write
not rhyming won't cause any fright
lemerics are harder
if we trade i will barter
a syllable 'cause a rhyme has more might

[Jonny_trigonometry]

I'm about to head over to math class
I sat here all night on my fat @$$
come mid-day I'll frown
metabolism will be down
so when I eat I will probably pass gas

writing limericks will make me late
so i should not hesitate
to stop with the posting
my morning bread is toasting
reminds me why punctuality's great

You have written so many good limericks
Zooby and Tribdog are mavericks
I'll leave you with this one
this has all been good fun
weaving words in the internet fabrics