Bad Puns ;D

[quddusaliquddus]

That are so bad they should be pun-ished :biggrin:

[quddusaliquddus]

jus did a google n found sum pun-dits had created loads of sites on puns :D

[jimmy p]

LOL... A Richard Whitely Classic...

RW: "Oh Carol I like your top"
CV: "Thanks Richard, the colour is Sink Blue"
RW: "Maybe I could see your taps".

[quddusaliquddus]

Found a very "constructive" pun on one of the "sites" .. [get it? ... construction sites?.....get it?...get it?... :D]

"The inventor of the balloon was full of hot air."

[quddusaliquddus]

LOL...jimmy...Richard Whitely reason deatre is puns .... lol

[quddusaliquddus]

Let's make Richard Whitely's puns a seperate subcategory of this thread...he 'counts' as something special [get it? ..counts - countdown?...get it?...get it?...]

Maye god have mercy on the souls of those who enter this thread .... :D

[jimmy p]

Lol Richard Whitely is the Punmaster 2000

[quddusaliquddus]

When Nobel Laureate Gunter Grass received his Nobel prize for
Literature in 1999, Dr Horace Engdahl delivered the presentation speech
which concluded "I would like to express the warm congratulations of the
Swedish Academy as I now request you to receive the Nobel Prize for
Literature from the hands of His Majesty the King."

So, Gunter turned towards His Majesty and received his citation and his
cheque for a million dollars (actually it was for Swedish Crowns but I
converted it for convenience ;). He started putting the cheque in his
shirt pocket when His Majesty gently asked "Shouldn't that go to your
back pocket?" Gunter wasn't sure why His Majesty was saying so, so he
started to shove the cheque into his back pocket.

Now, Dr Horace who was behind him interrupted and wondered " Isn't the
front (shirt) pocket a much better location for the cheque?"

Gunter was stunned and started asking her in whispers why she or His
Majesty were interested in where he kept the cheque. His Majesty
overheard him asking her the question and chipped in exactly while she
was answering.

They answered in unison - "We'd always heard that - Grass is always
greener on the other side!" (By Gunjan Saraf)
:biggrin: :biggrin: :biggrin: :biggrin: :biggrin: :biggrin: :biggrin: :biggrin: :biggrin: :biggrin: :biggrin:

From:
http://www.punsgalore.com/cgi-bin/pg/randompg.cgi

[quddusaliquddus]

For the mathemtacians amongst us:
The teacher asked the class," Can anyone use `before' in a sentence. Johnny raised his hand and answered,"Two plus two would be four!!"

[jimmy p]

A teacher is teaching a class of 5 year olds...

Teacher: "Can anyone use the letter I in a sentence?"
Johnny: "I is...."
Teacher: "No Johnny, we say 'I am' not 'I is'"
Johnny: "Ok, I am the eighth letter of the alphabet."

[quddusaliquddus]

Lol...good one

[sandinmyears]

A teacher is teaching a class of 5 year olds...

Teacher: "Can anyone use the letter I in a sentence?"
Johnny: "I is...."
Teacher: "No Johnny, we say 'I am' not 'I is'"
Johnny: "Ok, I am the eighth letter of the alphabet."
No, "I am the NINTH letter of the alphabet." :)

[jimmy p]

Oh yeah, it would help if i didnt have two fingers strapped together.

[Artman]

You guys are a really punny, regular Atilla-the-Puns. :approve:

[quddusaliquddus]

Wipe that simili off your face! :D

[BoulderHead]

Yeah, before somebody gets poked in the eye with pungee stick ! :wink:

[jimmy p]

the pun-ctuation is some of these posts is terrible.

[i_wish_i_was_smart]

i was retarded

haha home made pun

[cookiemonster]

A real one from English last year.

"... was one of the foremost American poets."
"So who were the other three?"

cookiemonster