How to attract a babe: The old school of thought

[Ivan Seeking]

After studying fossils in a region called Dragon Bone Hill in China, anthropologist Russell Ciochon of the University of Iowa concluded males of the species were clubbing one another over the head, probably to win females...

...For more than 100 years, researchers have pondered the odd shape of homo erectus' skull, which looks something like a bicycle helmet.

http://www.cnn.com/2004/TECH/science/02/12/coolsc.thickskulls/index.html

 

[motai]

Now imagine if today's society did that...

 

[Zantra]

ya ... I know what you mean...

Dating would be much simpler

 

[one_raven]

What do you mean, "Imagine if..."?
I have met guys that try and win a girl by proving just how hard and thick their skulls are.
Quite a few, in fact.
What has really changed?

 

[FUNKER]

I hear u man, society wears the make up of civilism but after the night out all ur really left with is primates with panda eyes

 

[zoobyshoe]

"...probably to win females." is pure speculation. Different bands of homo erectus probably had head clubbing conflicts with each other over every concievable thing. Native Americans in the northeast were avid users of the "war club", in classic skirmishes over territory, and Native Americans in the Northwest carved elaborate clubs called "slave killers" that were used in the ritual execution of their slaves. I don't see any good reason to conclude homo erecti were bashing each other in conflicts over females at all. The only thing that can be said is that they were almost certainly bashing each other. Why is not evident.

 

[jimmy p]

Those crazy homo erecti! I wish i could club people. Maybe i should join the police. There are a lot of idiots and stupid-looking people who deserve to be clubbed. However the people i would like to club usually ARE the thick skulled variety so it would be like trying to date them or something... got to re-think my strategy? How does running them over sound?

 

[MacTech]

Originally posted by jimmy p
Those crazy homo erecti! I wish i could club people. Maybe i should join the police. There are a lot of idiots and stupid-looking people who deserve to be clubbed. However the people i would like to club usually ARE the thick skulled variety so it would be like trying to date them or something... got to re-think my strategy? How does running them over sound?

*clubs jimmy p*

*hopes to get noticed by the female population of PF*

 

[jimmy p]

LOL! [b(] *passes out*

 

[MacTech]

Originally posted by jimmy p
LOL! [b(] *passes out*

"w00t"

*hopes Monique saw that*

 

[zoobyshoe]

Originally posted by MacTech
*hopes to get noticed by the female population of PF*

MacTech, I just now figured out you are not the hot chick in your avatar. Word of advise if you want to attract PF females: make sure they know you are male.

 

[MacTech]

Originally posted by zoobyshoe
MacTech, I just now figured out you are not the hot chick in your avatar. Word of advise if you want to attract PF females: make sure they know you are male.

well it was really kinda a joke from the original PF, but yeah i know.

 

[jimmy p]

*wakes up briefly* Dont worry i made the same mistake zoob, if u would be kind enough to look at the "Member's photo thread" LOL, most embarassing...

MacTech would you kindly do the honour of clubbing me again?

 

[MacTech]

Originally posted by jimmy p
*wakes up briefly* Dont worry i made the same mistake zoob, if u would be kind enough to look at the "Member's photo thread" LOL, most embarassing...

MacTech would you kindly do the honour of clubbing me again?

LOL, that was pretty funny :)

sorry jimmy, she isn't noticing at all so it doesn't really work, so not going to club you again...

then again...

*clubs jimmy p again*

why not eh?

 

[zoobyshoe]

Originally posted by jimmy p
i made the same mistake zoob,

If MacTech wants to parade around PF in drag it's not our mistake to suppose he's a woman.

 

[jimmy p]

thanx, I am working on a new angle...the "prone" look. Maybe girls will fall for people who are passed out on the floor...THATS HOW DESPERATE I AM! *passes out*

 

[MacTech]

Originally posted by zoobyshoe
If MacTech wants to parade around PF in drag it's not our mistake to suppose he's a woman.

your basing gender on avatars, omg that is royal. lol.

 

[zoobyshoe]

Originally posted by MacTech
your basing gender on avatars, omg that is royal. lol.

I guess you have amnesia for your previous acknowledgment that it is against convention:

Originally posted by MacTech
well it was really kinda a joke from the original PF, but yeah i know.

 

[Monique]

Ben is my long-lost PF1 buddy Now, *attends to poor Jimmy* look what that brute did to you.. you'd like some pani puri?

 

[jimmy p]

IT WORKS! i mean...ooh ooh, my poor head [b(] that bully clubbed me n it weally weally hurts! *bottom lip quivers*

 

[MacTech]

Originally posted by Monique
Ben is my long-lost PF1 buddy Now, *attends to poor Jimmy* look what that brute did to you.. you'd like some pani puri?

hi Monique :) yes it seems i am back for a while. too bad those PF1 days are long over :( oh well.. attends to poor jimmy eh? don't make me kill him ;) lol

Jimmy Jimmy you defy the study tsk tsk

 

[MacTech]

lol nvm.

 

[Math Is Hard]

Who's picture is that, MacTech? You look a little like Christina Ricci.

 

[zoobyshoe]

Originally posted by Math Is Hard
Who's picture is that, MacTech? You look a little like Christina Ricci.

M.I.H.:

I just hope you're not another transavatarite.

 

[Math Is Hard]

No way, Zooby.
Keepin' it real!

 

[zoobyshoe]

Originally posted by Math Is Hard
No way, Zooby.
Keepin' it real!

Thanks. I find it less confusing.
Incidently, we have the same birthday. Is it raining in Malibu? (Or is that just where the Avatar lives?)

 

[Math Is Hard]

My avatar lives in Malibu, but I am in Westwood.
And it's cold, grey and drizzling here in Bruin-town.
Nice to meet you, fellow fool! :)


"You will do foolish things, but do them with enthusiasm." - Colette

 

[Tsu]

Originally posted by Math Is Hard
No way, Zooby.
Keepin' it real!

WOW! You're a REAL Malibu Barbie?!

MacTech! Don't worry! You've been noticed! How could we NOT notice (and *wonder* about ) some guy with a 'sweet young thing' as an avatar?!

 

[Evo]

Tsunami, you're so CUTE!

No wonder mom always liked you best...

I know...I should be sleeping...

 

[Tsu]

Originally posted by Evo
Tsunami, you're so CUTE!

No wonder mom always liked you best...

I know...I should be sleeping...

 

[zoobyshoe]

Originally posted by Math Is Hard
Nice to meet you, fellow fool!

You too, fool, (but not fellow).

-------------------------------

"Ah well, I am a great and sublime fool! But then I am God's fool, and all his works must be contemplated with respect."

-Mark Twain

 

[motai]

Originally posted by jimmy p
Those crazy homo erecti! I wish i could club people. Maybe i should join the police. There are a lot of idiots and stupid-looking people who deserve to be clubbed. However the people i would like to club usually ARE the thick skulled variety so it would be like trying to date them or something... got to re-think my strategy? How does running them over sound?

Running over them might work, or you could teach them algebra at gunpoint. The latter may give some results (hopefully), otherwise result to first suggestion.

 

[jimmy p]

LOL. I suppose it would be satisfying to watch their brain explode as they try to contemplate using letters instead of numbers...Then to make sure they are goners, ill run them over.

(this is important because not all of these idiots have a brain...just the brain stem with a tumour which produces 'fight hormones' which are different from testosterone...)

 

[motai]

They would probably make a very futile attempt to learn (i.e. x^2 - x = x) or wonder if pi is food.

 

[Math Is Hard]

Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm...pi!

 

[Tsu]

Originally posted by Math Is Hard
Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm...pi!

Banana Creme from Madonna Inn. Yumm...!

 

[jimmy p]

Quick Motai, there is no time to lose!

 

[motai]

*gets out his sack full of heavy doorknobs* Its Whackin' time.

 

[Math Is Hard]

LOL!

Just don't try dragging us off by the hair back to your cave. That really hurts!

 

[Ivan Seeking]

Proof that this practice continues!

Recently a friend commented that he was going out clubbing that night! This was stated within a sexual context.

 

[null]

--------------------------------------------------------------
Recently a friend commented that he was going out clubbing that night! This was stated within a sexual context. Ivan
---------------------------------------------------------

So if he were to do some clubbing (of other guys) in a club do you think that this would double the effeciency in impressing the ladies? (Oops just realized I'm not in the ask a stupid quetion ...)

Well I suppose since I am one (girl that is) I can say the answer is, probably not. However Monique,Jimmy, and MacTech did demonstrate an interesting twist showing the efficiency of the clubbing for the (supposed) victim for gaining female sympathy so there may be hope for this technique yet.

 

[Evo]

I would definitely go for the "clubee" as opposed to the "clubber".

 

[null]

Yup given the choice I too would have go for the "clubee", or on the other hand perhaps the tall, dark, and handsome brazilian stranger standing by the bar who was appaled by it all. Yup I thinks that's my favorite outcome.

Sorry guys you'll just have to come up with a new technique.

 

[Evo]

Originally posted by null
Yup given the choice I too would have go for the "clubee", or on the other hand perhaps the tall, dark, and handsome brazilian stranger standing by the bar who was appaled by it all. Yup I thinks that's my favorite outcome.

Sorry guys you'll just have to come up with a new technique.

Ooooh, I like null's outcome even better!

 

[Tsu]

Originally posted by Evo
Ooooh, I like null's outcome even better!

Why are you on the internet at 3 a.m.? GO TO BED! (I'm telling Mom!)

 

[zoobyshoe]

So, the anthropological truth may be more like:

Two homo erecti are sitting in a bar. First one says to the second one: "Wow! Ya see that babe who just walked in? Quick. Whack me on the head, and act mean.!" Second one says: "Sure, dude. Just don't forget you owe me."

 

[jimmy p]

the trick is to whack the appalled looking brazilian...

 

[LURCH]

Originally posted by jimmy p
Those crazy homo erecti!

Shouldn't that read "whacky Homo Erecti"?

So, I think we've proven here that natural selection favors those who are repeatedly beaten over the head. Explains a whole lot about the current condition of our species, don't it?

 

[zoobyshoe]

Originally posted by jimmy p
the trick is to whack the appalled looking brazilian...

No, that would just make him doubly appealing. Better to "acciently" spill your drink on him (those brazilians are proud of their clothes) so that he loses it and whacks you first.

Originally posted by LURCH
Shouldn't that read "whacky Homo Erecti"?

So, I think we've proven here that natural selection favors those who are repeatedly beaten over the head. Explains a whole lot about the current condition of our species, don't it?

Lurch, I think you're absolutely right. The thinner a guy's scull, the easier he goes down, and the more the women go for him. Thus Nature selects the smarter, (sapiens) thinner sculled, "clubee".

 

[Tsu]

If you guys would quit whacking each other in the head to get our attention, maybe we would quit thinking you act so BRAIN DEAD a lot of the time!

edit: not you, Ivan dear! You're DIFFERENT!