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Lame Jokes

by quddusaliquddus
Tags: jokes, lame
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OmCheeto
#2107
Mar3-12, 11:59 PM
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I did something today that I don't think I've done since 2nd grade.
I finished a book in one day. 190 pages!

Jim Clifton: The Coming Jobs War

63% of me strongly agreed with 85% of his conclusions
16% of me strongly disagreed with 8% of his conclusions
10% of me thought 2% was just his biased opinion
and
11% of me had no comment

---------------------------------
Jim Clifton is CEO for the Gallup Organization
Anna Blanksch
#2108
Mar4-12, 01:02 PM
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What did the sheep say to his clone?

...I am ewe!
Borg
#2109
Mar5-12, 04:52 AM
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Quote Quote by OmCheeto View Post
I did something today that I don't think I've done since 2nd grade.
I finished a book in one day. 190 pages!

Jim Clifton: The Coming Jobs War

63% of me strongly agreed with 85% of his conclusions
16% of me strongly disagreed with 8% of his conclusions
10% of me thought 2% was just his biased opinion
and
11% of me had no comment

---------------------------------
Jim Clifton is CEO for the Gallup Organization
I think that the margin of error is likely to be pretty large for a poll of one.
Jonathan Scott
#2110
Mar5-12, 06:13 AM
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Quote Quote by Anna Blanksch View Post
What did the sheep say to his clone?

...I am ewe!
Works better with HER clone.
SHISHKABOB
#2111
Mar5-12, 08:00 AM
P: 614
http://longestjokeintheworld.com/ or http://www.readability.com/articles/zqlm5gdi if reading it like that is a pain

warning- really long
Jimmy Snyder
#2112
Mar5-12, 08:30 AM
P: 2,179
Quote Quote by SHISHKABOB View Post
I read that joke before, but it was called the widest joke in the world.
SHISHKABOB
#2113
Mar5-12, 09:20 AM
P: 614
Quote Quote by Jimmy Snyder View Post
I read that joke before, but it was called the widest joke in the world.


oh god
OmCheeto
#2114
Mar5-12, 08:22 PM
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Quote Quote by Borg View Post
I think that the margin of error is likely to be pretty large for a poll of one.
I am in the early stages of Alzheimers, and have already forgotten nearly everything I've read.

If I read it again, and analyze it again, does that cut the margin of error in half?
QuarkCharmer
#2115
Mar5-12, 09:49 PM
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P: 1,035
Quote Quote by Lancelot59 View Post
So does seven.
So does 3+4n rights.
Vacade
#2116
Mar10-12, 08:22 AM
P: n/a
When in a cold room,which part of the room would you go to?



The corner. Because its 90 degrees.
Received Notice
checkitagain
#2117
Mar11-12, 12:43 AM
P: 99
There's a paradox about a barber in a town who only shaves people
who don't shave themselves.


Anyway, when this barber shaves a person, what does he use?



He uses Occam's Razor.


--------------------------------------------------------------------


And when the barber trims someone's hair and parts it in certain ways,
what is he doing?




He is making Dedekind Cuts.
mcknia07
#2118
Mar11-12, 01:28 AM
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P: 321
These are the jokes I sometimes get... Mind you... Yes I am blonde. Doesn't mean I like them tho, lol.
I like Serena
#2119
Mar11-12, 07:07 AM
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Quote Quote by checkitagain View Post
There's a paradox about a barber in a town who only shaves people
who don't shave themselves.


Anyway, when this barber shaves a person, what does he use?



He uses Occam's Razor.
Isn't that barber female?
So she does not need to apply that Razor to herself.
rollcast
#2120
Mar11-12, 07:21 AM
P: 418
An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotchman walk into a bar.

The barman says to them, "Is this some sort of joke?"
jtbell
#2121
Mar12-12, 11:24 AM
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Quote Quote by rollcast View Post
a Scotchman walk into a bar.
Say "Scotch" only when you're thirsty, mon.
SHISHKABOB
#2122
Mar12-12, 07:25 PM
P: 614
Why is ten times two the same as two times eleven?

Because ten times two is twenty, and two times eleven is twenty, too.
Jimmy Snyder
#2123
Mar15-12, 01:02 PM
P: 2,179
I made a wooden car with a wooden engine and wooden wheels but it wooden go.
OmCheeto
#2124
Mar17-12, 01:47 PM
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I told someone yesterday, that I might share their "joke".

Quote Quote by Mike
Would this be a hasbean?
Man killed buried under 20-foot mound of pinto beans



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