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US Customs Find Man Smuggling Squirrels

  1. Dec 16, 2005 #1

    Mk

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    http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20051215/ap_on_fe_st/smuggled_squirrels [Broken]
     
    Last edited by a moderator: May 2, 2017
  2. jcsd
  3. Dec 16, 2005 #2

    Math Is Hard

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    hmmm.. I suspect Dr. Foofer's involved in this somehow.
     
  4. Dec 16, 2005 #3

    arildno

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    Dearly Missed

    Are squirrels affiliated with Al-Qaeda?
     
  5. Dec 16, 2005 #4

    Evo

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    Yep, I think he's branching out.
     
  6. Dec 16, 2005 #5
    wow, it was bad enough when one got into my house, can you imagine what would happen with one running looses on a plane? That guy had to have some pretty big..ummmm nuts? To think he would get away with it.
     
  7. Dec 16, 2005 #6

    Moonbear

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    I'm just trying to figure out why someone would try smuggling squirrels. It's not like you can't just find more wherever you go. :confused:
     
  8. Dec 16, 2005 #7

    Evo

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    If they were staying in his pockets, perhaps they were pets? I don't know too many wild squirrels that would just sit quietly in a pocket.
     
  9. Dec 16, 2005 #8

    BobG

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    Are you sure the news article is correct about them being squirrels? If the guy's name is Dave and the rodents are actually chipmunks, then there is a logical explanation.
     
  10. Dec 16, 2005 #9

    Math Is Hard

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    :biggrin: :biggrin: :biggrin:
    Well, it is nearly Christmastime..
     
  11. Dec 16, 2005 #10

    Evo

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    I have the Chipmunk Christmas CD. :approve: :blushing:
     
  12. Dec 16, 2005 #11
    You guys, these were illegal alien squirrels:

    They were going to take acorn harvesting jobs from American squirrels.
     
  13. Dec 16, 2005 #12
    I have the record! :surprised : i don't have the record player anymore, so i can't ever listen to it, but it came with a story book and all the lyrics!
     
  14. Dec 16, 2005 #13

    Evo

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    That's still at my mom's house, or it better be. :devil:
     
  15. Dec 16, 2005 #14

    Evo

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    :biggrin: ...
     
  16. Dec 16, 2005 #15

    Mk

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    !!!!! AHHHH all the cops, the navy, the airforce! We're being taken over by alien squirrels!!
     
  17. Dec 16, 2005 #16

    Danger

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    It did say ground squirrels. This is clearly a case of illegally imported luncheon meat.
     
  18. Dec 16, 2005 #17
    Squirrel baloney?
     
  19. Dec 16, 2005 #18
    Am I the only one that found this sentence amusing? I mean, yeah, it's a real disease, but what goes through my mind is "tap 'indigenous Mexican squirrel' plus two colorless mana and cast plague on target creature"
     
  20. Dec 16, 2005 #19

    Danger

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    With acorn butter.:tongue2:
     
  21. Dec 16, 2005 #20

    Moonbear

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    Do you think the ground squirrels know where the border is if they aren't carried across in someone's pockets? If they just felt like wandering across on their own, would customs still stop them? :uhh:
     
  22. Dec 16, 2005 #21
    That's impossible. Animals, unlike some humans, obey political boundaries.
     
  23. Dec 16, 2005 #22
    Anti-terror squirrel tactics
    1)Look to see if there anyother squirrels in the area
    2)Run if they bite you might get there biological weapon the Rabies virus
    3)If there are any tree's in the area run away from them this will elimte the squirrels abillty to have a constant supply of nuts to thorw at you
    4)Use any kind of range weapon you can find don't chase them there fast
    5)Call the Air Froce tell them carpert bomb the area
    6)After the Aif Froce carpet bombs the area serch for any squirles
    7)If you find any squirles still alive call the Air froce and tell them to Nuke your postion,Don't worry about dying.... the Goverment will pay for your funeral(but your will and life insurence is your problem)
     
  24. Dec 16, 2005 #23

    Evo

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    Politically correct squirrels. :biggrin:

    The following is totally meaningless and off topic.

    I once had a squirrel named Roger, I know, Danger is saying, "wait, your turtle's name was Roger", all of my animals were named Roger, I thought it was funny, I was a weird child. Anyway she would come and scratch on the back door when she wanted nuts. They are smart animals and easily trained. Yeah, I realized Roger the squirrel was female when she had babies.
     
    Last edited: Dec 16, 2005
  25. Dec 17, 2005 #24
    oh one time, when I was working on the soundboard of my school's theater, I heard these noises coming out of the closet. So ignoring it, I go back to work when all of a sudden, I saw this really young squirrel nibbling on wire. When I turned my head, it ran back into the closet. I wanted to lead it out, thinking it somehow got lost inside the theater and wanted out. So to try to calm it down, I started singing to it. Now, I'm a bass, so this didn't work so well. So instead, I kept working and when it snuck out again, I ignored it until it was close enough to the exit. I then turned around, chased it down some stairs and out the door.
    I later found out that there's a family of squirrels living in the theater walls so I probably broke up a family. It was also raining heavily while I chased the young squirrel out the door, and watched it hop fearfully into the cold cruel world. I'm a squirrel homewrecker. :frown:
     
  26. Dec 17, 2005 #25

    Evo

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    That's sad. :cry: How horrible to have carried that guilt all these years. HOMEWRECKER!!!! :grumpy: At least you meant well.
     
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