What to Do When You Receive a Gift You Don't Want

[Math Is Hard]

Mom and Dad got me a nice Samsung Eternity phone for my birthday. It just showed up today. The thing is.. I don't want it. Mom had told me a few weeks ago that she and Dad wanted to get me a phone for my birthday, and I asked her not to. I like the phone that I have.

Should I ask if she still has the receipt? Should I pretend I'm thrilled and keep it?

Can I sell the phone or give it away? I don't know how that works - she might have set it up with my plan.

Yours truly,

MIH the ungrateful brat

 

[Danger]

I've been in that situation a few times, primarily from the wife. I just use the new one and put the old one someplace for safekeeping. The things you do for love...

 

[Pengwuino]

It'd be rather unfortunate if you just renewed your 2 year plan on the current phone and couldn't use a new one... right? ;)

 

[Math Is Hard]

The thing is that the phone I have now is on our family plan. The folks got it for me when I was in school because they insisted I have it and it was only an extra $10 a month. I almost never use it. I carry it for emergencies. I really have no use for the fancy multimedia gizmo phone.

 

[Danger]

Just grin and bear it, honey. It's not worth risking hurt feelings.

 

[Math Is Hard]

Just grin and bear it, honey. It's not worth risking hurt feelings.

You're right. I just use the stupid foo-foo phone.

 

[Cyrus]

I had the same problem with this UCLA t-shirt...

O BTW Sweet phone, I'll take it!

 

[Math Is Hard]

Phones do sometimes get lost or stolen...

 

[Danger]

Phones do sometimes get lost or stolen...

 

[lisab]

Getting a pho-pho-phone isn't too bad, as unwanted gifts go.

Better than soap (yes I got soap once...what's up with that? I shower every day! OK, so it was "fancy" soap...foo-foo soap...but still...soap?!? You might as well give a nice engraved plaque saying, "Yeah, so I have no idea what to get you for your birthday.").

 

[Brilliant!]

Just grin and bear it, honey. It's not worth risking hurt feelings.

I don't think so. She'll be forced to use a phone she doesn't like using so as not to hurt someone's feelings? I mean, it's not like laying a bed of nails, but she'll be stuck with the crappy thing for a while.

I think you should let them know you appreciate the idea, but you just really don't like the phone (give good reasons). But! You'd like to use the money to get a phone you can really get a lot of benefit out of. That's win-win.

 

[Danger]

I don't think so. She'll be forced to use a phone she doesn't like using so as not to hurt someone's feelings? I mean, it's not like laying a bed of nails, but she'll be stuck with the crappy thing for a while.

I think you should let them know you appreciate the idea, but you just really don't like the phone (give good reasons). But! You'd like to use the money to get a phone you can really get a lot of benefit out of. That's win-win.

I'm afraid that I can't agree with that on the surface. The critical factors, though, are the personalities of her parents. Only she can know what the effects of various approaches might be.

 

[Cyrus]

This new phone sure does go well with my UCLA shirt.

BTW, I also have a Harvard shirt that suree would go well with a new BMW.

 

[Danger]

Good ol' Cyrus... always the mercenary.

 

[TheStatutoryApe]

If you don't really use your phone for much anyway I don't see the problem. Its perhaps a waste of money, but not yours.
You may also find a use for the extra stuff on there. I don't know if your's has it but Google Maps is great for finding places I need to go for work. I can even look for local businesses of certain types; laundromats, department stores, ect. There's also a documents function that can handle Word, Excel, and Powerpoint. I don't have much use for those but you may find some for school. Mine has some room on it already but with an SD card I can use it for storage like a thumb drive and even view some of the files with the phone. If you have data service you can even send e-mails with it which has come in handy on occasion.

 

[redargon]

They want you to be safe and accessible so they gave you a phone which they think is more reliable than your old one (for the same reasons they gave you phone in the first place). I did the same thing to my gf. Her battery was crap and she would have like 5 mins of talk time or it would never be on. It would never have sufficed in an emergency situation, so I convinced her she needed a new one. She nevers uses the camera (in the first week maybe), she never goes online, she doesn't use the calendar even, but I know that she has a reliable phone for calling and smsing (which is what phones are for), plus she did love the new ringtones and the fact that it has two alarms to help her get out of bed. Try your new phone out for a couple of weeks. If you still don't like it, put it on ebay for a $ (at 23:35 EST and only accept bids from userid: Redargon )

 

[Dadface]

Phones for presents!You lot must be rich.All I get is a lump of mouldy cheese and a bit of bacon rind.

 

[Loren Booda]

Gift giving is an old tradition:

"The status of any given family is raised not by who has the most resources, but by who distributes the most resources. The hosts demonstrate their wealth and prominence through giving away goods." http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Potlatch"

 

[Evo]

I'm not into fancy phones either MIH.

 

[turbo]

I'm not into fancy phones either MIH.

I have a chintzy LG TracFone for emergencies. It makes and receives calls. It doesn't take pictures, doesn't access my email or the Internet, or any of that stuff. It's compact and fits in pockets easily. That's all I need. Cheap pre-paid air-time on a basic phone.

If someone gave me a fancy phone with all kinds of extraneous functions, I'd ask if they would please take it back and get a refund. I leave my cell phone off unless I want to make an outgoing call - I don't want to feel shackled to it.

 

[Cyrus]

I have a chintzy LG TracFone for emergencies. It makes and receives calls. It doesn't take pictures, doesn't access my email or the Internet, or any of that stuff. It's compact and fits in pockets easily. That's all I need. Cheap pre-paid air-time on a basic phone.

If someone gave me a fancy phone with all kinds of extraneous functions, I'd ask if they would please take it back and get a refund. I leave my cell phone off unless I want to make an outgoing call - I don't want to feel shackled to it.

You don't work, so you really don't have a need for one. But if you did have to work and schedule meetings, those phones are *very* handy. Having an online map is also very helpful when you're trying to find your way in DC by foot.

My phone is a simple POS like yours, . Different brand though.

 

[rootX]

iphone (or even ipod - just wifi) looks like the best thing out there.
Palm Pre is coming soon
and, then there's blackberry storm

(Gotta love iphone/ipod calendars or google maps
they can be synchronized with google calendar)

 

[Math Is Hard]

I had a talk with Mom. I explained that I really like the current phone I have (which she also gave me) and didn't want to give it up. I also reminded her that I had asked her not to get me a phone, which she didn't remember. She had gotten the same model for my brother and sister and they really loved it so she thought I would to. But they are "phone people", constantly texting and using their phones for music and video. That's just not my thing.

The good news is that she was thinking of buying the foo foo model for herself in a few months, so we decided I would try it out, and if I don't like it, I'll send it back to her and she will use it. I really think she will get much more enjoyment out of it than I would.

 

[Math Is Hard]

Phones for presents!You lot must be rich.

Well, that's the thing - we're not. It kills me to see her spend all that money on something I don't need or want. It's just too impractical.

She should know about my frugal tendencies by now. When I was 5 she brought home a Christmas tree and I got very upset with her and said, "what are you doing? We can't afford a Christmas tree!" We were dirt poor in those days.

 

[Jimmy Snyder]

We were dirt poor in those days.

We were the same. I don't give or receive gifts except for cash. When I first got married, I give my wife $10 and she gave me $10. How young and innocent we were. Now I give her $100 and she gives me $100. I know it sounds mercenary, but we both need the cash. Just don't buy me anything. I'm very particular about my possesions and prefer to buy my own. The features, color, cost, weight, and caliber have to be just right or I won't enjoy it to the full. If you haven't done so already, read "The Gift of the Magi" by O. Henry. It's just a few pages long, and sums up these issues well.

http://www.auburn.edu/~vestmon/Gift_of_the_Magi.html"

 

[Danger]

weight, and caliber have to be just right

I have a pretty good guess at what you'll be buying yourself for your birthday. I'm a '.45 in a Colt/Browning action' guy myself.

 

[turbo]

We were the same. I don't give or receive gifts except for cash. When I first got married, I give my wife $10 and she gave me $10. How young and innocent we were. Now I give her $100 and she gives me $100. I know it sounds mercenary, but we both need the cash. Just don't buy me anything. I'm very particular about my possesions and prefer to buy my own. The features, color, cost, weight, and caliber have to be just right or I won't enjoy it to the full. If you haven't done so already, read "The Gift of the Magi" by O. Henry. It's just a few pages long, and sums up these issues well.

http://www.auburn.edu/~vestmon/Gift_of_the_Magi.html"

My wife and I can't afford such extravagance. For Valentine's day, I dig out my wife's box of "treasures" and find the first V-day card that I ever gave her and set it on her side-table so she'll see it when she gets up. It's hand-made, and it was the way I chose to ask her to marry me. A scrap of art-paper, an envelope with a hand-inked "stamp" and "cancellation" - it still gets a nice reaction 34 years later.

 

[turbo]

BTW, jimmy, if you get the urge to buy me a gift I'm partial to 10mm auto. .45-70 in long-guns.

 

[Evo]

My wife and I can't afford such extravagance. For Valentine's day, I dig out my wife's box of "treasures" and find the first V-day card that I ever gave her and set it on her side-table so she'll see it when she gets up. It's hand-made, and it was the way I chose to ask her to marry me. A scrap of art-paper, an envelope with a hand-inked "stamp" and "cancellation" - it still gets a nice reaction 34 years later.

Now see, something like that would mean more to me than anything anyone could buy, well, except maybe for a Hardee's thick angus burger and curly fries.

 

[Monique]

The good news is that she was thinking of buying the foo foo model for herself in a few months, so we decided I would try it out, and if I don't like it, I'll send it back to her and she will use it. I really think she will get much more enjoyment out of it than I would.

That sounds like a good solution. The past weekend I bought some handsoap and the store clerk seriously asked me whether it was a present It also was my sister her birthday last weekend, she always makes long lists of what she wants to have an distributes it to the families. You really need to buy what's on the list, sometimes we jokingly buy something stupid that is not on the list, just to make her sweat