What disorder does this seem like?
Apr8-12, 03:47 PM
I have a very hard time learning in public education environments for the following reasons:
Whenever I'm attending a class, and the teacher/professor is talking, I would block out everything around me, including but not limited to the teacher talking, most visual information (at least in terms of details), other people talking, and so on. Roughly 95% of the outside information will be blocked out and not processed at all. It's blocked out to such an extent that I can't take notes (the most notes I ever wrote down was about 1/10 of what the normal student did), don't process most auditory information which the teacher presents, and often don't even react to the outside stimuli.
When I was a child and most of the things were written down on the blackboard, I could at least mechanically copy all the stuff which had been written down on it. Now, most of the lesson is presented in an auditory form, or as a mix of various data types, which, as you can imagine, doesn't work well with my learning patterns.
However, whenever I self-teach, I don't have any problems and learn far faster (up to 20 times faster) than I ever would in a public learning environment. What I've noticed is that when I self-teach, my brain recognizes the information presented as things that have to be learned, and learns them very efficiently. This isn't the case in a classroom environment, where my brain doesn't automatically identify and set the learning information sources and their datatypes.
Also, when I was a middle school student, I skipped up to 4 months of school in a row, as going to school made me very frustrated and stressed out. This is still the case for any public learning environments I visit - I usually end up spending my lunch breaks locked up in a bathroom stall. And despite other people approaching me and trying to be friends, I have a very hard time figuring out the course of action which would lead to a friendship. I don't know how to act in roughly 70% of the social situations.
If this helps, I also had some symptoms which could be indicative of this problems in my early childhood, such as:
-Not responding to my name most of the time (I didn't recognize my parents calling me, until they repeated it many times and started yelling)
-Having a mild speech delay - started speaking around 2 years and 3 months old
Sorry if my spelling and grammar is a little bit off - English isn't my primary language.
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