Convert Xbox to Marshall & Morphy XJX: Time Machine Help

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Discussion Overview

The discussion revolves around the conversion of an Xbox into a Marshall & Morphy XJX 24-hour time machine. Participants explore various methods for installation and components required, including an anti-gravity chip and a Quad sync time pulser crystal. The conversation includes technical challenges, speculative ideas, and humorous takes on time travel.

Discussion Character

  • Exploratory
  • Debate/contested
  • Technical explanation

Main Points Raised

  • One participant inquires about installing an anti-gravity chip without causing static discharge, mentioning attempts with various methods including Zykron units and David Blaine's levitation.
  • Another participant humorously suggests using a genetically engineered marmoset to replace components, while also proposing a convoluted plan involving stock market manipulation to acquire necessary parts.
  • Concerns are raised about the feasibility of using an Xbox for time travel, with one participant warning that it could disrupt the fabric of space and time.
  • A suggestion is made to use a hadron composite rectilineator to reset circuitry, indicating potential issues with previous methods used.
  • One participant argues that the conversion method is impractical, noting that it may cost more in time and effort than it saves financially, and that it would disable the Xbox for gaming.
  • Another participant humorously suggests using a DeLorean and a flux capacitor, emphasizing the importance of reliable technology for time travel.
  • Some participants express skepticism about the possibility of time travel, citing potential catastrophic consequences for the universe.
  • A legal notice is humorously included, claiming copyright infringement for using the Xbox in the proposed time machine project.

Areas of Agreement / Disagreement

Participants express a range of opinions, with no clear consensus on the feasibility of converting an Xbox into a time machine. Some view the idea as humorous or impractical, while others engage in speculative discussions about the components and methods involved.

Contextual Notes

Participants reference various fictional and humorous elements related to time travel, which may not align with real-world physics or technology. The discussion includes speculative claims and unconventional methods that lack empirical support.

bozo the clown
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I need help converting my X-box to the Marsahll & Morphy XJX 24 hour time machine.

How do I install the anti gravity chip without a static discharge, I've tried everything from Zykron static discharge units to David Blaine levitation ?

Also I need a cheap Quad sync time pulser crystal

tx
 
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bozo the clown said:
I need help converting my X-box to the Marsahll & Morphy XJX 24 hour time machine.

How do I install the anti gravity chip without a static discharge, I've tried everything from Zykron static discharge units to David Blaine levitation ?
I use a genetically engineered, static-free marmoset that I trained to replace all components.
Also I need a cheap Quad sync time pulser crystal

tx

Well, if your machine was working, you could go to the swap-meet, in New Des Moines, but since it doesn't exist yet, you're kinda screwed. I suggest manipulating the stock market for a few weeks, use the profits to buy your QSTP xtal, jump to the meet, buy a cheapie, then hop back to prevent yourself from screwing up the time stream before the chronocops catch you.

Njorl
 
Who in their right mind would use an X-box to create a time machine. Your going to end up crashing the fabric of space and time.
 
bozo the clown said:
How do I install the anti gravity chip without a static discharge, I've tried everything from Zykron static discharge units to David Blaine levitation ?


The David Blaine method has come under some scrutiny lately and perhaps it has caused some of your difficulty.

Did you try the Zyrcon units before or after the DB method? If you tried DB first, some residual blather may have been left on the motherfathersisterbrother-board. David Blaine blather is extemely counterintuitive to any logic circuits and could reverse all intended outcomes.

I'd suggest a hadron composite rectilineator to reset the circutry, and you may have to get a new Zyrcon unit, since they only work until you try to use them.

Seeing as how you have not thanked me yet, I guess It didn't work.

to be said by bozo the clown
You people are talking goblydygook do you understand my post ?
As I came back, I picked up this huge wad of cash!
 
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Good grief. You're an idiot. For starters, you need a Delorian. That's the best frame for the job, large enough to carry you and a passenger to the required "take-off" speed, large enough to carry the required equipment, et cetera. Strong chassis. Next, install a flux capacitor (tm) just between and behind the seating area. If you're into time travl, then you know all about flux capacitors. They may be a rather old technology, but they work fine. Reliability should be high on your list of priorities while scooting through time. You can usually find a second hand flux capacitor on Ebay at a reasonable price (although often those selling time-travel gear on the net are doing it as a scam; they sell something, travel, take it back, sell it again...). Now, some people like junk-powered, some like steam, some use solar, whatever. I like the Mini-Apocalypse Cold Fusion Master from Suitcase Nuke Incorporated. It's the size of a briefcase and should power your time traveling car nicely for about 250,000,000 years (subjective, of course). If you want flight capability, I suggest a set of Gravitron Booster 3000s from Hoverlite (a company which gets started in the year 2019, so you'll have to shoot forward to install these). They're fast, reliable, and provide amazing manoeuverability. And of course when you travel through time, you can sometimes arrive in altered Earth environments, due to industrial disasters or such, so I suggest taking a few litres of peanut butter. Smearing it along the edges of the doors and winoows works very nicely for a bit of extra sealing.

Oh, take a cat, and trust it's instincts. Cats being the masters of time travel and trans-dimensional motion.

X-Box indeed. Pfft.
 
First of all, the X-Box Conversion, XBC, to M^2 XJX is of course the poor-man's-method of time travel (As has been hinted at in previous posts).

Some important notes before proceeding:

1. By the time you procure the parts to perform the conversion, you'll end up spending more in time and effort than the money you'll save by going this cheaper route.

2. This method also leaves your X-Box disabled for usual game play, which many people consider unacceptable.

3. Einstein, in his studies of time, determined mathematically that time is indeed money. So, armed with this knowledge, are you sure you want to advance quickly through time? Having advanced quickly through money, I can tell you that it is not all that it is cracked up to be.

4. The parts you are looking for will probably not be available online, however, I can get them for you, for a fee. Of course if you are planning to install the kit yourself, it will negate the warranty and there can be no guarantee that the parts will function correctly.

In my conversion kit I have added many special features for instance: many people who have done this conversion have experienced Boise-Einstein Condensate flux. Should this occur, just push the special button, which I provide with the unit marked, "Flux Off."
 
bozo the clown said:
I need help converting my X-box to the Marsahll & Morphy XJX 24 hour time machine.

How do I install the anti gravity chip without a static discharge, I've tried everything from Zykron static discharge units to David Blaine levitation ?

Also I need a cheap Quad sync time pulser crystal

tx

Sorry, but those titles have not yet been released outside Japan.
 
Next week, you will haven told me that it will workened out.
 
You people are talking goblydygook do you understand my post ?
 
  • #10
Sure. Get a Delorian.
 
  • #11
I just use a tuna sandwich...
 
  • #12
I believe time travel would be impossible. If somebody had a working time machine it would virtually tear the fabric of...well...everything! All 11 Dimensions (according to M-theory).
I've played X-box, I lose a lot. If that was actually happening (with time travel) anyone would ruin the universe as we know it. (Hence, if you have rigged up something like that, I suggest NOT using it!)
 
  • #13
Dear [bozo the clown]:

It has come to our attention that you have made an unauthorized use of our copyrighted hardware entitled [x-box] in the preparation of a work derived therefrom. WE have reserved all rights in the Work, first published in [date], [and have registered copyrightof Microsoft]. Your work entitled time machine] is essentially identical to the Work and clearly used the Work as its basis.

As you neither asked for nor received permission to use the X-box as the basis for [Time Machine] of same, WE believe you have willfully infringed my rights under 17 U.S.C. Section 101 et seq. and could be liable for statutory damages as high as $150,000,000,000 as set forth in Section 504(c)(2) therein.

WE demand that you immediately cease the use and distribution of all infringing works derived from the Work, and all copies, including electronic copies, of same, that you deliver to me, if applicable, all unused, undistributed copies of same, or destroy such copies immediately and that you desist from this or any other infringement of my rights in the future. If I have not received an affirmative response from you by [date give them about 2 weeks] indicating that you have fully complied with these requirements, I shall take further action against you.

Very truly yours,

Microsoft





OR ELSE...
 
  • #15
kaos said:
Dear [bozo the clown]:

It has come to our attention that you have made an unauthorized use of our copyrighted hardware entitled [x-box] in the preparation of a work derived therefrom. WE have reserved all rights in the Work, first published in [date], [and have registered copyrightof Microsoft]. Your work entitled time machine] is essentially identical to the Work and clearly used the Work as its basis.

As you neither asked for nor received permission to use the X-box as the basis for [Time Machine] of same, WE believe you have willfully infringed my rights under 17 U.S.C. Section 101 et seq. and could be liable for statutory damages as high as $150,000,000,000 as set forth in Section 504(c)(2) therein.

WE demand that you immediately cease the use and distribution of all infringing works derived from the Work, and all copies, including electronic copies, of same, that you deliver to me, if applicable, all unused, undistributed copies of same, or destroy such copies immediately and that you desist from this or any other infringement of my rights in the future. If I have not received an affirmative response from you by [date give them about 2 weeks] indicating that you have fully complied with these requirements, I shall take further action against you.

Very truly yours,

Microsoft





OR ELSE...
:smile: So, does that include any copies that he already distributed in the future, after the patent expiration date? :biggrin:
 
  • #16
Moonbear said:
:smile: So, does that include any copies that he already distributed in the future, after the patent expiration date? :biggrin:

Oh crap now my head is spinnmg...
 
  • #17
Time machine help?

Just read the .
 
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