I think I may have done some permanent damage

tribdog

How's this for the most pathetic way to spend new years. About 2 hours ago I heard someone scream. I opened my door and saw my neighbor throw something out her door. She went back inside and i went to see what she had thrown. It is a pink box, Fing'rs Liquid/Powder Acrylic Nail Maker and Repair Kit. I brought the box inside and opened it up to check it out. I paint with acrylic paints, and there is even a paintbrush in the box. Anyway here's what I did on New Year's Eve. I decided to see if I could make a fingernail. It turns out that I can. I now have a very long thumbnail and a shorter, but stylish pointer fingernail. I have noticed however that my lips are tingling and my vision is blurry. I'm going to go open the door now and see if some fresh air helps. Anyone think they can beat that New Years?

tribdog

okay, what's the deal? how do you take these things off? I damn near ripped my real fingernail off.

tribdog

and the stupid paintbrush is stuck to my bedspread

Evo

Tribdog, you're one of a kind. Just don't get your fingertips close to any heat sources.

karen03grae

acetone will do it. Soak em'

tribdog

I just heard my neighbor outside looking for her nail kit. I waved to her and she waved back and I've got a big ol thumbnail, but she didn't notice.

tribdog

I don't have acetone. I don't even have peanut butter. I'm a bachelor, living alone.

Tsu

Take a $10 bill and hold it in the hand that doesn't have the thumbnail. Now put the $10 in your easiest reached pocket. Now put your hand with the thumbnail in your other pocket. Go to your local drugstroe and buy some acetone, but do NOT pull the hand with the thumbnail from out of your pocket in the store or you get those same looks that folks give gay guys with only one or two fake nails on one hand. Now, go home, pull your hand out of your pocket and soak it in some of the acetone that you bought. If you're lucky, it might come off. If it doesn't, just tell people that you are learning guitar picking and fake nails make excellent picks.

Moonbear

Um, what Tsu didn't tell you is that when you go to the drugstore to buy acetone, it will be conveniently called nailpolish remover. Make sure you read the label and get one that has acetone in it. They make non-acetone removers just for the purpose of NOT melting fake nails when people actually put them on to keep them and paint them. If anyone gives you strange looks about buying nailpolish remover, just grunt something about a super-glue accident. It's the only acceptably manly response to explain that purchase. Or buy a lot of condoms with it to cover up that you're buying nailpolish remover (don't mix the two though!).

Y'know...I'm starting to have second-thoughts about you tribdog. I'm really wondering if I can handle a guy who reheats a ham in an oven set to "clean" and then does his nails on New Years just to see if he can! I mean, sure, I'll be endlessly amused, but I'm starting to picture life living with Tim "The Tool Man" Taylor from Home Improvement!

Math Is Hard

ha ha ha!! Moonbear, living with tribdog will be good practice for when you have toddlers running around the house. Like tribdog, you can't leave them alone for 5 minutes. And when they're quiet, it's time to worry!

Moonbear

LOL! And if I could tribdog-proof a house, I have no doubt it would be childproof! It's much harder to tribdog-proof houses. I don't know, after a week and a half with my 18 mo-old nephew, I'm not sure I have the energy to keep up with a toddler. How do parents do it?

Artman

Ha! Tribpuppies!

franznietzsche

I'm gonna have nightmares now. That is truly a scary thought.

Chrono

It's a lot scarier than that "Please Daddy" thing he gave us.

franznietzsche

I don't recall that.

Moonbear

Oh, good heavens! No tribpuppies! That would be far too much to handle! I was thinking more along the lines of just one little Mooncub perhaps.

Artman

Aww, but can't you just picture it, a whole bunch of tribpuppies running around, melting things to the carpet, gluing fake nails on stuff...it would be fun.


What "Please Daddy" thing?